Originally Posted by ceriphante
....seriously mate, been through similar situations to this one a couple of times, myself, it only all seems to end in pain and suffering if you hold out and keep being nice...
there are a few things to consider here though, if she doesn't have enough faith in you and your relationship in the first place to break up with you, then you actually hold up your end of the bargain and get out of the rut and get the job, then what is it worth?
This is very true. This is what I have been wondering myself since the day she ended it. I have yet to understand why, when I was holding up my end of the bargain, did she end it.
also if she's already playin around with other guys then she is either 1 the kind of gal that does this stuff deliberately (sadly many of them do) to mess with you or 2 the kind of gal that is confused but acts stupidly before thinking things through properly, either way all she is showing you is disrespect,
I would have to probably go with the 2nd choice.....actually that sounds very accurate. She never thought things through before she acted upon them. She never learned to think first either. Which would further my belief that someday she will realize that she didn't really think things through and made a mistake giving up somene that loved her as much as is loyal and honest......is this unrealistic to think? Actually she admitted that she hadn't really thought things through, but that this was what she HAD to do. I do believe that her brother was a huge influence in the situation though, which also goes to show that she wasn't acting on her own thoughts, but that still doesn't excuse her from being the bi$ch she has been I also believe her friends, who are majority restaurant employees as well whom enjoy spending their nights dropping the dollars they earned on their shift, at the bar getting wasted, were also a big influence. Of course they only knew me at a bird's eye view as well.
another bit, any female that mistakes kindness and love for weakness doesn't deserve to have you in their life in ANY way at all, if I were in your shoes I would just use the one thing that will let you get on with your life, (unfortunately it will actually mess her up more than you realise but what goes around comes around)
I wish I could print this on every billboard where she lives, so that she could see this. You can't put it any better than you did here. I couldn't agree with this more, and its nice to hear that she is the odd one out, and not me.
first up change your phone number, secondly ignore EVERY and ANY advances she makes, tell your friends that as far as she is concerned you don't want to know if she contacts them and if she does to have them say something like look the guy loved you so much and all you did was burn him, laugh and then say ah cry my friend a river and get over herself then hang up, (btw if your friends are willing to say this then you have some good solid friends, mine have and would again when I had crazy gals calling them lol)
Yeah, this is something I need to take in to mind. I always hear when she contacts my friends, and therefore that keeps me thinking about her, and then sometimes, I wonder why she is willing to contact my friends, but couldn't even take the time to contact me......but now I realize that she doesn't even deserve my time, unless she is wanting to for sure come back. ...but I don't think she is the type that would just come out and say, "i want you back".....so after how many times of her contacting me, if she ever does again, do I respond?
then I would keep workin the good job and saving and then move on with your life, you have better things to do than live days of our lives episodes with a stupid girl repeatedly, and there are girls out there that are highly intelligent, caring, sophisticated, communicative and respect their partners, find one like that :)
Yeah, I am planning on just working this job and doing as much work on the side as well and saving as much as possible....these are things that will benefit me. I will continue to make myself a better person, and maybe she will then realize how much she messed up.....so that is what drives me each day! Or, if she doesn't realize, then I guess maybe someone else, sophisticated and communicative, and appreciative of my unconditional love will!
regardless the outcome all the best!!!
oh and as for how you're feeling right now, try not to let your mind focus on it, think forwards in time, consider 'hey in a year from now am I going to even remember this girls name?!" chances are the answer to that is no, I have a beautiful girlfriend/fiancee/wife depending on what you want :)
Thank you for your responses.....you really hit the nail on the head.
Regards
Greg.