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-   -   How can I make him love me again? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=169102)

  • Jan 5, 2008, 12:35 PM
    tinat
    How can I make him love me again?
    Pleaseeee helppp mee pleasee I love this guy so much he used to love me before but he's just fallen out of love, ino there is still love for me but I don't knoe how to relight it pleaseee I am hurting so much pleasee help meeee.it will mean the world to me..
    Hi me and my b.f been going out for like 1 and half years but for a couple of months things have been rocky, and we have broken up and got back together several times, and now he said he don't feel the same way about me he don't love me anymore he cares about me but don't love me and want to be in a relationship.I told him how I feel I've begged and cried but none of that seems to be working.I just wish someone out there knows a way to get oyur lovved one back. I was heartbroken and he said after my exams our relationship is definatlely going to be over because he don't want the hassle.he is only staying with me because I said I don't need to be upset while doing my exams, so after he said were definitely going to break up.so basically I have a month with him before he says its over.I need him want to be with me and not break up. Please help I want him to love me like he did before. I love him so much that id do anything for him please please help me he is my 1st love. I just want the relationship to be how it is beofre
    Don't tell me to move onn because I can't atal and ino deep down he doesn't waant to eithr.
    Thankyouu
  • Jan 5, 2008, 12:55 PM
    Mirandaead
    I'm sorry for the way you must be feeling right now. But it sounds to me that you are giving way too much and he's not giving anything in return. In order for a relationship to work there has to be some balance of giving and taking. Sounds to me he's just taking. I know you don't want to but what you should do is cut him off. If he's planning to break up with you and you know it why would you stay with him? Leave with some dignity. Trust me there will be plenty of other guys that would be willing to give you what you deserve. You deserve better than this guy. I think you should just tell him that you don't want to be with him anymore and that you deserve better. Ignore his calls and everything. It'll be hard. But it'll make him realize how bad he messed up. You might consider going out with your friends and doing things you couldn't do while you were with him to pass time. Anyway. This is just what I'd do. Take it for what its worth.
  • Jan 5, 2008, 01:32 PM
    tinat
    Hi I don't want to leave him because I got my a level eexams in a week and I don't need to go through the heartaache of not being with him while in my exams ,because I will mess them up, ino inside he does care for me but I just need him to realsie that, can you tel me how to re establish the love that we had, I can't leave him not now anyway.I would fail my exams and be in tears evryday.trust me its already hapeend once and I don't want it to happen again please help me I'm madly in love and id do anything. How can I I make him lovee me like he did before>?
  • Jan 5, 2008, 01:46 PM
    red_cartoon
    He is staying with you so that you don't have to be uspset through your exams. That shows he cares about. At this point you should prepare well for your exams. After your exams you'll get plenty of time to discuss things with him.
  • Jan 5, 2008, 02:01 PM
    crushedovernover
    Get a grip first off. Relax. It is not the end of the world. Tomorrow will come along with many other days and months. And just chill out about it... Coming from a guys view the more of a deal YOU make it the more he will make it. If you shrug it off like nothing happen and just be yourself, yourself that doesn't need him then you will be OK. If you break up big deal.. He told you it is coming might as well do it now.


    Answer me this,, How are you any less stressed knowing he is going to do it after exams. You won't be any dif.. I would break up with him now.. If I were u
  • Jan 5, 2008, 02:08 PM
    tinat
    I am less stressed because I still think if he's with me now we have a chancce if I dump he now ino it will be harder to get him bback, and it is less streess because I don't have to go throguh a break up while my exams are going on, yeah it is going to be at the back of my head but I won't be hurting as much as not being with him.
  • Jan 5, 2008, 03:11 PM
    Kiwigal
    It's always hard to break up with someone you love deeply - I know, I've been there many times (and have shed plenty of tears). If you feel it is best that you stay together until after your exams then so be it, but I think you are setting yourself up for even more heartache by holding on to the hope that you will be able to convince him that he loves you enough to stay with you.

    He's already told you that although he cares deeply about you, he doesn't love you in the way you obviously want/need him to. You can't force or convince anyone to love you (I learned that the hard way with my ex husband). I was devastated at the time, but once I realised this, I was able to move on and find someone who really did love me, the way I wanted them to. By holding on to this person and being unable or unwilling to let him go, you are actually closing yourself off to other opportunities and future happiness with someone who really will love you the way you deserve.

    Of course, you will mourn the loss of your first love, but that's just it, it's your FIRST love - there will be second, thirds and possibly more in your lifetime. Your single days can be spend discovering more about yourself and spending time with other friends which can be soooo much fun. Each relationship you have will bring you that much closer to THE ONE, and will allow you to learn about how you act in relationships and what you want/need in order to have a long-term one.

    I'm not telling you to get over it, because it's not as easy as that - but there is soooo much out there for you, you're just at the beginning of the journey. He's not the one for you, but you will find your man in time, just like I did! Good luck with your exams, and gather your friends around you as you will need them at this tough time. :)
  • Jan 6, 2008, 12:16 PM
    talaniman
    You need to get a grip, because no one can make someone love you. Now do your exams and worry about everything else later. Calm down, your scaring everyone.
  • Jan 6, 2008, 05:50 PM
    babybrown
    Heyy I understand how you feel. Though I'm at the same point as you . Me and my ex dated for almost a year and he treated me like a princess. All of the sudden this one day he tells me he can't make time for me and doesn't want me sufering for him when he can't come out and make time. He said it was his grad year and he was very busy with skool and work. He got over me in a month and couple of days. He still cares about he because he always asks my friends about how I'm feeling but here's something that's holding me on to him I know he care and everything but he told me he doesn't feel the same no more . I really want him bacck because I 've tried everyhting to get over him its not seem to be working. I want him , I want everything to be how it was before. Is there anyway he can bring his feelings back for me.?

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