Originally Posted by NJCUTIE77
Hi.. I am going to explain my entire situation to you all... hopefully it makes sense...But for some background info.. my boyfriend is a bipolar and also has OCD.. so I have a feeling this all plays a major role in ALL OF THIS! Maybe be long, but please read on:
I've been a wreck these past few days...I'm just very confused about what's going on... To make a long story short... Bryan (my boyfriend)moved into this house with this jerky guy.. He's a 40 year old man who has a beer pong table in the house, parties like 5 nights a week to cover bands, hangs out with all 20 year olds, in a band..and addiced to myspace... Just a weird guy if you ask me. .. Anyways, the guy got along great with me until one night we went out and there was this girl there I was talking to... These other girls showed up and I asked the one girl if she knew them and she said yeah, that her boyfriend supposedly hooked up with one... And I said that I heard about that... THAT WAS IT I SAID... Well the girl went back and said something to her boyfriend...twisting words around and the 40 year old roommate got mad...So, after that incident he was rude to me everytime I went over there... Then all of a sudden I started getting text messages sent to my phone by an unknown number...and they would say things like, "your boyfriend is cheating" among other things... Well, I told bryan and he confronted the people in the house about it... And the guy got pissed off... And then after that, there has been a lot of arguing there and such... And the guy starts bad mouthing me saying things like, "she doesn't want you here so she's doing it to her self"... Stupid stuff and that he's going to sue me for deformation of character (LOL) bc I tell people he's sending them lol.... Stupid guy....So, this past weekend, bryan was supposedly late with the utility bill and the guy called him at work ing about it... Then told him he was irresponsible and should leave. Well...he got very very pissed off about it bc now he has to find a storage place and find a new place to live... This all happenned on Sunday... And the conversation we had was fine until that issue came up... So, I told him that I felt terrible about it and that maybe I should leave because I felt like I was ruining his life... Even though none of this is my fault... But I feel so bad about it... He was like, "what is that going to accomplish".. And I was just like I don' tknow... So he said he wanted to call me later... And I haven't heard from him in 3 days... And stupid me.. I sent him flowers at his work today...I have never done that with a guy in my life... But I don't want this to end over this stupid crap...Now to what recently happenned:
So, on Saturday we met with each other around like 7:30... I pretty much laid everything out on the line.. Some of the things that he said were like, "did you give those girls a bad look and not realize bc I know sometimes you can come off as intimidating", "did that guy really say that to you"... (remember I told you about the instance with the friend with the guitar and I asked him to play something and got that snide remark), "can we agree that sometimes you say things (because I am frank) and people take it the wrong way"... it was almost as though he was indirectly blaming me for things. I laid everything out on the table and explained to him, "why would I have straightened everything out with that guy, why would I have told you to take the bigger room, why would I have bought you stuff for your place, why would I have tried to smooth things over with jay, if I really wanted you out of there".... Most of the time he was extremely quiet... and he was sniffling the whole time... He could barely look at me and when he did, he had such sadness on his face...his eyes were full.... So, then we sat in silence for a little while...I was really bad crying... and he said, "I think we need a break"... "I need to sort through things... everything is a mess... I have to find a place to live, I have no idea what's going on, they want me out of that house asap, etc...etc.. and I just need the time to just deal with all of this because it's a big deal"... So, I didn't argue with the break... I did say to him though, "i hope you find a place and i could be part of it" and he said, "i hope you will be too".... then I took my stuff and started walking out... His mother gave me a key chain that says, "I love Bryan"... i took it off and gave it to him along with the sticker that said, "i love you" on my phone... and he got upset saying, "see... there has to be compromise.. you get upset and walk out... that's not what I meant"... So, I sat back down and was like, "well what does 'take a break' mean.. I never did this before" and he was like, "neither have i"... and he proceeded to say that I just need a month or something to sort through things blah blah.. I said, "well what do we do... do you want me to date other people because I do not want to do that". He shook his head... then I said, "do you want me to wait" and he shook his head yes... so I said I would think about that... And he proceeded to say that he knows that sometimes a break will make things better and stronger or something... who knows... but he said, "i will call you"... So, then I told him that I didn't bring his stuff with me and I was like, "i could drop it off at your house or hold on to it" and he was just like, "hold on to it".. he owes me money from when he was sick and he had like $500... but I told him to give me the full amount in Cash. So, on that I walked to my car.. He came up behind me and hugged me and was crying a lot.. like tears coming down... the hug was very tight.. and he just kept saying, "I will call you, you will be ok, I will call you"... and I let go and was getting in my car and he went to hug me again.... that was it... then I was pretty hysterical... But, I just don't understand any of this at all....It is all so sudden... and I really think that a lot of this has to do with the illness because i know that bryan doesn't think the same way you or I do.... So, I don't know... but I am crushed... I really want things to work.... but this month for myself I am just going to stay mellow and think about things that I want.... If it works, I think we need to put everything out there and I would need to have to have a serious talk with him about all of this....Sometimes I have a good feeling about it, but others I feel like he will never call and want to work.. He knows how much I love him... and frankly, I think if it wasn't for me, he wouldn't be where he is...and I hope he realizes all that stuff... All I could really do now is just wait and hope....So, that is the story... I am kind of just numb about everything... No, I'm not ok and I probably won't be for a while.. but I do know that when he calls I am not going to show a hint of sadness to him.... His sister said that he thinks about a future with me.... that maybe this was a blessing in disguise meaning that something worse would have happenned with the roommate later on... how could he let a two and a half relationship go over this... he probably doesn't even feel badly about it...? Please help!:confused: :(