My 10 year old son is making extremely bad choices lately, in regard to stupid lies. For example, when ask,"Did you brush your teeth?" His response is yes.. Several different occasions. Then when checked - he didn't brush his teeth. There is no family dynamic change. He is active in school, sports and overall is a great student. We, as a family, discourage and hate lying. We go to church and really stress the importance of character. I have grounded, spanked, made him write but nothing I do is changing the behavior. HELP!

I don't know much about this sort of thing, but I think its common for children to tell little white lies here and there. And some kids do have punishment/discipline issues no matter how great their parents parenting skills can be. However, it could also be that your son is in the very early stages of turning into a pathological liar. And I think pathological lying usually stems from an underlying mental illness/disorder. If you've found that you've tried everything with no progress, have your son speak with his school counselor. Tell the school counselor about his constant lying, and that you're out of ideas on what you can do. Not to scare you, but it could be more than you think. Maybe something is bothering him, and its his way of getting attention... idk. Check it out with the school counselor.

If he lies, take away "things" if he ends up with a mattress on the floor and only given the clothes for the next day. Treat him like a child, make him brush his teeth in front of you and so on.

Then as he proves his trust, you let him have more back.

Its very common for kids to tell stupid little lies like with the teeth brushing. Just don't let him get away with it. When you check and find he has not, then brush them for him. So that he sees, no matter what he does, they WILL be brushed, and him lying and not doing it only delays the inevitable.

My kids' dentist gave us a mouthwash that revealed (in red or blue?) unbrushed areas of their teeth. I'm sure something like that still exists. Maybe that could be your checkup on his toothbrushing skills--and he would enjoy doing it, be properly horrified. Of course, a good second brushing will remove the colorful stains.

If you do this, don't tell him what you are up to. Just let him use the mouthwash and then grin into a mirror.
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My son went through this stage. It was very distressing to me. I abhor lies.

We sat down and talked to him about it, but that didn't work. We took away toys and privileges and that didn't work.

Grounding, a spanking, you name it. Just like what you're going through. None of it worked.

Then one day he came to me and asked if we could go to see a movie at the movie theater. He really wanted to go. Earlier that day he had lied to me about having finished his homework. I was going to say no to the movie because of that lie, but instead I told him we'd go on Saturday.

Saturday was 3 days away. For 3 days he couldn't stop talking about the movie. He couldn't wait to go.

Well, on Saturday I told him we weren't going. He was shocked "but mom, you said we'd go!" My response "I lied. How do you like it?"

He's 13 now, and occasionally he'll tell little white lies (lies that everyone tells), but never a big lie, and if I ask him a straight out question, he'll always tell me the truth.

I know that fighting fire with fire isn't ideal, but it works. Maybe your son needs to feel what lying does. Maybe he has to be on the receiving end of a lie to truly grasp how bad it is.

My thought on this is that he needs his eyes opened a bit; for example
When he lies about having brushed his teeth, set him down and have a TALK, no argument no O MY YOUR IN TROUBLE, but a talk. Make him feel like he's part of the conversation not being persacuted. Teach him the dangers of developing a habit of lying (talk to him about this often, once he starts getting it then ask him why what how and so on). Also teach him the importance of brushing his teeth (or whatever the case may be) tell him that he could lose his teeth, develop oral problems as well as put him at a higher risk for heart disease.
He needs to have a relationship with his parents where he feels he can talk to you about anything, that he doesn't have to lie or cover up about things. His lying now about small things could soon turn in to lies about big things. He needs to learn about trust and how vital it is to human relations.
I personally like to turn to books when it comes to these things, to get more perspectives and advice as well as more ways to approach the situation. When it comes to my boyfriends son (who I love like my own) I like to find workbooks that really get him thinking about the issue at hand, then we talk about it and he tells me how he feels. Sometimes we'll do excersizes where we'll role-play a situation with our roles reversed so that he's the one that's being lied to or something (keep in mind this is just an excersize and he knows that) so that he can see what it feels like.
The best way is to take a positive approach, don't down him on it that will only intesify the situation. He's getting to an age where he wants to be respected and treated like an adult. Use that to your advantage, show him that too get that kind of respect he's going to have to give it first.
Good Luck