So this guy first asked me to go over to his place for a first date to watch some movies. Then he asks me if I'm the type of girl who kisses on a first date and I said "it would depend" and he ended up not kissing me. That night was cool and he kept texting me everyday after that night until we went to a rave together and I ended up having sex with him the second time I saw him. After that he still kept texting everyday and arranged to meet again just to hang-out and stuff. On our third meet, we just stayed at his place with his friends and watched TV. We made out but I wasn't in the mood for sex so I told him I didn't want to fool around. He took me home and still kept texting me until we saw each other again 3 days later. He picked me up from home and we went to his to have sex for a bit but I had training so I had to cut it short. Then he drove me to training and kissed me goodbye. He texted me after my training a couple of times and then didn't the next day so I initiated a text conversation. Then I somehow managed to tell him that I wanted sex that night and he made me come over and I stayed the night. We had a fantastic time watching movies and other things. He also cuddled lots in bed and it felt nice.

The problem is.. I'm not sure about what I want from this relationship. If my attachment is purely sexual or if I am starting to like him. He has not bothered to text me after that night which was strange but I texted him after a couple of days and he texted back.

Is he still interested or should I just move on?

It's sexual. You have not even gone out on a date. To make sure invite him out to a movie. Don't have sex with him and see if he contact you again.

How old are you. I don't necessarily agree its totally sexual, but obviously that's a big part of it.

You do need to re-examine your own values after giving into to sex on a second "date". Or even going on a first date that involved watching movies at the boy's house.

I think maybe you should go out instead of at his house. I think this is sexual situation and nothing more.

The problem is, even if you do like him, because you slept with him so soon he will now or probably already has, put you in the category of hook up only type. That's how guys work. I never give in that soon when I'm dating a new guy or interested in someone, because I've learned the hardway. You can't take back but what you did, but it sucks because you jumped into things too fast and he probably will only want to use you and hook up.

p.s how old are you? When you have feelings for a guy, you will know, it will be mutual and you both will talk on it. You won't have to guess. But be careful because if you continue to sleep with him so soon in the game, your only setting yourself up for hurt, since women's emotions get in the game that way, and guys... well they take awhile longer.

Try to keep the relationship "dating" go out, don't have sex on every date. If he still calls then it is a relationship, if he only calls to have sex, then that is what it is.

I would go hide under a rock! The date process is over, before it even began. He didn't even need to buy you dinner. Do you even know anything about this guy to think you like him? You haven't gone anywhere together or spent quality time. No, cuddling doesn't count. Everyone like to cuddle. Don't sell yourself short.

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Originally Posted by brkfstatiffs

p.s how old are you? when you have feelings for a guy, you will know, it will be mutual and you both will talk on it. you won't have to guess. but be careful because if you continue to sleep with him so soon in the game, your only setting yourself up for hurt, since women's emotions get in the game that way, and guys ...well they take awhile longer.

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I'm 20.

To be honest, I never really had the intention to keep seeing him after the first time we had sex. But when we had the chance to hang-out with his friends, he seemed like the type of guy I would want to be a relationship with. Well, I'm not assuming that he is since you guys are totally right about me jumping ahead of time before I even got to know him. But at this stage, we both admitted that we liked each other but we're both confused as to how we do like each other- If it's a pure sexual thing or if we enjoy each other's company. Actually after we fooled around the second time, he told me that he's not sure about what he wants but right now he just wants sex without hurting anyone or being hurt. I kind of felt the same so I agreed on our plan to keep fooling around but I told him I totally don't mind being romantically involved with him eventually if something develops and he said he's on the same boat.

We have stopped seeing each other for a few days because we're both sick and I just got back to school with loads of work to do. But my plan is to sort out my feelings by agreeing to meet with him in the weekend if he asks. I'm totally not sure if I should keep fooling around with him or not though.

The fact that you are 20 does mitigate this a bit. From your OP, I assumed you were a teen. I would still cool it a bit.

Since you already jumped so far in the relationship process, it could be hard if he really does feel attracted to you or your body. I think you should talk to him and ask him if he really loves you for who you are and not for how well you can (do it) , but don't harass him about it either. In the end the best possible thing I can tell you is to find someone else who loves you, truly. And next time find out more about the person your going to bed with.

You knew already what his intentions are and you feel you might fall for him. Women are emotional. Its hard to take a risk so I advise not to proceed with your set up. But of course the decision is yours.

Sex with a stranger, that's what you have gotten yourself into, and I think he is a rebound from your past relationship. Stop the physical, and find out if its JUST for sex, or not.

China,
It's sound totally sexual, but you never know with these kind of things. People are a curious sort. Just because he is a man doesn't mean that he doesn't want a relationship from you, and just because you are a woman doesn't mean that you should want a relationship from him. Just wait and see how things play out. If you want to you can ask him. If he gets antsy about it then my guess would be that he doesn't want the relationship.

Sidenote: Someone posted that he didn't take you to dinner. So what is she a prostitute now? I love that three dinner and then sex rule it makes me laugh. Let's do the math, if you figure the first date will be dinner, that can be about fifty bucks, then the second date will be a movie, let's say twenty bucks, and then finally the third date, dinner again, let's make it one hundred bucks. And the grand total is $170. You are worth $170 dollars, but I want to include all of the other women if a man is really trying to impress you, then you could be worth over a grand. I'm just being facetious, but going to out to dinner with someone or going on an actual date with someone doesn't make them worthy enough to have sex with you. It's what you do on those dates. Hell, I lost my virginity to a man that never took me out to dinner before we had sex, he was my best friend. But that doesn't matter anyway. All I am saying is dinner or no dinner, knowing someone two days or six years it doesn't matter. People should have sex when both parties feel that it's right, and not do it because they have some guideline of when it is the appropriate time to do so.

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Originally Posted by chinaware

So this guy first asked me to go over to his place for a first date to watch some movies. Then he asks me if I'm the type of girl who kisses on a first date and I said "it would depend" and he ended up not kissing me. That night was cool and he kept texting me everyday after that night until we went to a rave together and I ended up having sex with him the second time I saw him. After that he still kept texting everyday and arranged to meet again just to hang-out and stuff. On our third meet, we just stayed at his place with his friends and watched tv. We made out but I wasn't in the mood for sex so I told him I didn't want to fool around. He took me home and still kept texting me until we saw each other again 3 days later. He picked me up from home and we went to his to have sex for a bit but I had training so I had to cut it short. Then he drove me to training and kissed me goodbye. He texted me after my training a couple of times and then didn't the next day so I initiated a text conversation. Then I somehow managed to tell him that I wanted sex that night and he made me come over and I stayed the night. We had a fantastic time watching movies and other things. He also cuddled lots in bed and it felt nice.

The problem is.. i'm not sure about what I want from this relationship. If my attachment is purely sexual or if I am starting to like him. He has not bothered to text me after that night which was strange but I texted him after a couple of days and he texted back.

Is he still interested or should I just move on?

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If he texts you back and you want to have sex don't let him know that, and neither should you show it because then they will always call you just for sex like there booty call.
You should go out like to dinner or the movies then you should see if its just a booty call or if you just want to be him for sex.

I never went on one single date with my husband. We were friends for several months, then one day we had sex. We didn't discuss our intentions really, we just had a good a time and one day we realised that we were in fact a couple. I'm not exactly sure how it happened but we've been together and very much in love for 8 years. Just goes to show that the 'socially accepted' way of beginning a relationship is not necessarily the only way.

The situation is what we call FWB (Friends With Benefits). It convienant and oh yea no commitement.

Thanks guys for your help. I've stopped seeing the guy but told him we can be distant friends. :-)

A relationship now adays for sure can be anything you want it to be. That is the first thing, to know what you want, and to share and be honest with the other party what you want.

PLEASE LEAVE THAT RELATIONSHIP ALONE ITS GONE.. THINK OF IT THIS WAY I PICK ANY OTHER RANDOM GUY KEEP HAVING SEX WITH THEM EACH TIME I SEE HIM OF COURSE HE IS GOING TO CUDDLE UP WITH me and pick me up.. EVERY TIME HE TALKS TO U HE IS THINKING HMM SEX.. he's a jerk move on he probably stop texting you because he is thinking you are starting to like him and he doesn't want to get to know you because he already had sex with u.. most guys are in it for the sexual/ physical get to know the person it's the mental and then worry about the sexual later because they have connected it messed up when u guys had sex he liked u for the physical but then u guys did it and BAME he is satisfied.. but if he comes back beware