It seems like most of the guys that I have dated lost interest in me if we started dating fairly quickly and easily. It seemed to happen even more quickly once we were in a relationship and I asked if we could go out to certain events or see certain things.

Then most of the guys that have asked me out on dates and it was difficult for us to find a time to get together were interested in me, but not me to them. So these guys didn't seem to lose interest in me.

I don't want to generalize, I just want some opinions. What does everyone think?

I guess if it took a lot of work to date you they may work harder at the relationship due to the amount of time and effort they put in just to get started. The old saying treat them mean keep them keen comes to mind. Its true that some men (not all) enjoy the thrill of the chase or get bored when its too easy. They want you because you're sociable and busy and in demand. So being unavailable gives off that impression.

If you're willing to go on a date with anybody, then any guy you date (who knows this) won't feel wanted and they'll lose interest before they even show up.

Maybe you need to smarted up and date guys that are into you and not only you into them. In your other thread you talk about the current guy your with and you shouldn't be with him. You need to know what you want in a guy then go out and look for guys with those qualities or at least someone your compatible with. Stop settling.

In a relationshiop you already have to keep things fresh because otherwise things can get boring once the "honeymoon" stage is over.

Well,I lose interest in people sometimes or maybe some of them people aren't ready.

I think my question was a little confusing. I meant:

Do guys lose interest when they go from dating to relationship really fast? For example, if a girl and guy met in January and started a relationship by the end of February?

Too much, to fast, crash, and burn.

Men love sweet and easy.

Hmm, conflicting opinions. Interesting. Hahaha.

If a relationship is meant to last it will. Each person might be able to hold on a little longer by being more accommodating, or by compromising, but if the core of a happy relationship is not there it won't last, regardless of who made the first move.

What agenda do you have when you are dating these men? When you are out on a date are you just enjoying yourself with this person or do you have some hidden agenda like when to have a boyfriend, get married and have children? Men can pick up on this stuff and he may not be interested in that, at least not right away and it sends them running faster then you can say marriage and kids. I tell people to engrave this in their minds. "Date to have FUN not to find the ONE." The reason I promote this is because #1- It creates a very comfortable and relaxing dating experience for both... the guy will not feel that you are judging him to an agenda. #2- It allows the man to develop that wonderful feeling of wanting to see you again. #3- As the man developes more of that wonderful feeling it eventually turns into something more serious. Of course there are many more wonderful benefits to this, "Dating for FUN," concept because it allows you to just be you. By not taking any date to seriously, even though you would LOVE for this guy to fall madly in love with you, you give the space for that to grow.

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Originally Posted by teastalk

It seems like most of the guys that I have dated lost interest in me if we started dating fairly quickly and easily. It seemed to happen even more quickly once we were in a relationship and I asked if we could go out to certain events or see certain things.

Then most of the guys that have asked me out on dates and it was difficult for us to find a time to get together were interested in me, but not me to them. So these guys didn't seem to lose interest in me.

I don't want to generalize, I just want some opinions. What does everyone think?

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Guys like a challenge! When they had to work hard to get you, the will not only feel accomplished but they will have the security that a random dude can't come into your relationship trying to steal you away. He will remember how hard it was for him to get you, and will have more confidence in you. I have two brothers and I've really noticed that. That's why the guys we don't like always want us so bad because we make it hard but the guys we do want are relaxed because we make ourselves so available. I don't believe in just dating for fun... you leave a part of you with everyone who breaks your heart... sometimes you carry backage. So its better to be selective and know what you want and what your goals are. Don't just date him because its fun... so wrong... date him because of how special he makes you feel and because you see a clear future with him. So next time you like a guy... make plans, have hobbies so that you're not always available.. even if your dying inside wanting to be with him every second... take it slow... make him work!