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-   -   My boyfriend just stopped having sex with me (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=426021)

  • Dec 17, 2009, 07:38 PM
    sadgirl19
    My boyfriend just stopped having sex with me
    So my boyfriend for over a year just recently stopped having sex with me, its like it went from 3 or 4 times a week and slowly went to not having it for almost 2 months, every time I ask him why he won't play with me anymore he always says I don't know, I didn't want to make it feel like I was bugging him but I guess it just hurt when he said he didn't know? So I kept asking him and then I finally got a response which I just think he gave me so I would stop asking and he just said I feel like your getting bored of me. I've tried many times to tell him that its not really about the sex its about being with him and he still won't have sex with me.. I feel like I'm not wanted or I'm not good enough. I just want to know what the problem is, sex used to be a big part of our relationship and now its nothing.
  • Dec 17, 2009, 07:50 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    There is a problem, and it is only guess work unless he will say.

    Performance issues, he has another girlfriend, he has a STD, he decided he is gay, he has been medically ill and having issues.
  • Dec 17, 2009, 11:16 PM
    talaniman

    After the lust has faded, there has to be something else to keep the relationship going. This is what you have to explore, but as long as you take a lack of sex as being personal, you will never be looking to find out the other things you need to know, that makes him a good partner and build on it.

    Make love to his mind, and the body will follow.
  • Dec 17, 2009, 11:26 PM
    sadgirl19

    But its not me.. he used to want it all the time and he would always be the one to start it even when he knew I didn't want to and then was just like a brick wall that came out of no where and he stopped... kind of like as if he didn't need me anymore like he found someone else or something I really don't know..
  • Dec 17, 2009, 11:53 PM
    Gemini54
    I suspect that he's just not that into you any more... or, he hates being bugged about sex.

    Back off and don't talk to him about it any more. See what happens.
  • Dec 18, 2009, 12:57 AM
    amicon

    How old are the two of you? Does he have health issues ? Or any addictions?
  • Dec 18, 2009, 01:05 PM
    Devorameira

    Desire fluctuates from time to time, but 2 months is a lengthy period for a young couple. Has there been any other changes in the way he treats you or is sex the only issue?
  • Dec 18, 2009, 01:35 PM
    Romefalls19

    My fiancé and I also have hit these bumps before. Honestly, I can just say that after my day and then going to the gym. I am just tired, and maybe something is on his mind that has been emotionally draining on him. There are a lot of reasons sex fades, but as Tal put it, there has to be substance to the relationship rather than a simple physical connection
  • Dec 19, 2009, 01:47 AM
    white angel

    Try to seduce him.. wear a very sexy clothes and try not to talk with him about sex directly... if he hasn't any healty issues he will respondes for sure... he maybe has a lack of self confident.. and he thinks that you are a way better for him... and maybe you did something wrong and he get so hurt...

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