My 32 year old daughter (she has 2 older brothers) said she never wants to see me again, that was 2 years ago. We have always been extremely close. Even when she moved 60 miles away, we saw each other a LOT. I was extremely close to her 3 children and often drove the 60 miles to pick them up for a few days then drove them back home. We shopped together, talked on the phone & computer and spent all holidays together. Then she decided that I shouldn't invite her older brother to family gatherings because he has some mental/substance abuse issues. I explained to her that all three of my children would always be welcome at my home no matter what and she was furious. She started coming up with every excuse under the sun as to why she was mad at me... father never loved her... I didn't come visit enough... brothers hated her... I never did enough for her and the kids... I didn't like her husband... she says everything is always about what I want and she's sick of it (none of this is true). She won't take my calls, she won't talk to me on the computer, letters and birthday cards are returned unopened. How can this relationship be fixed if she won't talk to me? It's been two years and I miss my daughter!!

I always hope time heals all things.

It might be that the more you try the more she rejects you.

I hate to suggest legal action but, depending on your State, you MIGHT be able to get Court-awarded Grandparent visitation. That, of course, could make the situation with your daughter even worse.

Was there a specific problem between your daughter and her brother, something personal just between them? Did he say or do something out of line to her or her family? Sometimes you have to invite X separate from Y but I agree - you invite, whether they want to show up is up to them.

Sounds like your daughter has issues of her own. There is absolutely no way of knowing what they are.

Is there a possibility that another family member could speak with her or would that make things worse?

Thank you for your answer. I don't know of anything specific about issues with her brothers, except that she used to complain that they ignored her family. If they did, I didn't see it, and besides her brothers are ages 40 & 35, so I really can't do anything about it (even if they WERE ignoring her). She refuses to talk to her brothers, to me & my husband and she has bascially stopped talking to everyone that we know. She says she has "new" and "better" friends in the new town she moved to. There are no grandparents rights in our state, unfortunately.

Here is my concern - this is not what you have posted on your other thread. On this thread you don't understand the conflict.

You explain the conflict on the other thread.

If you are not going to be entirely truthful there is nothing I can say. https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/emotio...ng-575320.html

I am asking that both threads be combined.

It's all true, I'm just doing a poor job explaining the sequence of events. Daughter's toddler son was diagnosed autistic in 2006. She was stressed out and started complaining about everyone in the family (they weren't helping enough). Her range of complaints was WIDE, but seemed to center on her oldest brother. At the time, since she seemed to be complaining about anything and everything, I didn't take it too seriously (there's always been sibling rivalry). When I didn't take it seriously, she turned her anger on ME. In 2009, it came to a head and she refused to talk or correspond with anyone in the family. A year or so AFTER that, we were told by a friend that our oldest son was spreading vicious lies about us. We checked into it and discovered he had been doing it for years (we had no idea). We tried to contact daughter to tell her that we now knew what she was trying to tell us was true, but she won't talk to us, she sends back letters, etc.

Again, this is not the story as presented, in or out of sequence.