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-   -   Family hates me. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=140280)

  • Oct 13, 2007, 01:58 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Family hates me.
    Well I'm 16... my birthday is on halloween... ever since 2 years ago I've been in trouble and I met a girl that I love with all my heart and I would do anything for her I've been together for a year and 4 months and all my family wants me to do is live with my mom because they want nothing to do with me and that would make it so hard to be with my girl friend my family is always calling me names or calling me fat I weigh 160 and I'm almost 17 all they say to me is hurting me really bad I really don't want to live here anymore but I don't want to leave my girl friend it tears my heart out to see her upset but its so hard to sit here and get put down everyday I'm in a lot of talking sessions with people my mom wants me to live with her but I hate it at her house cause I hate the people I go to school with and I smoke so my parents also hate me for that I have a step mom my 2 sisters hate me and my sisters boy friend is a dumb who hates me also they do little things for me and say it was a huge thing like if my car is out of gas cause I go to school and work so I try to do the best I can and I don't do anything else I was a huge drugie but I quit I do the best I can in school but my father still isn't proud of me and all I want to do is make it better for me here and nothing I do makes them happy I don't know what to do anymore I just need help or advice to help me anyone have any suggestions?
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:18 PM
    Clough
    Do you like yourself?
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:21 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Yeah I mean there's nothing wrong I think I'm just really upset with my life right now its just a big wreck
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:28 PM
    Clough
    Please realize that by my asking you questions, I'm just trying to sort out what is going on with you, so that I, or others might be able to help you better. Okay? So, do you mind if I ask you some additional questions? It sounds like you have a lot going on.

    There are quite a few people on this site who are really excellent at helping people and also want to help people to sort out what is happening in their lives so that the person who is troubled can have a happier life.

    By "talking sessions" with people, do you mean that you are in counselling?
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:37 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Yeah a lot of it too
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:40 PM
    Clough
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by wowineedhelp
    yeah alot of it too

    I'm not quite sure what you mean by the above statement.

    I just want to also let you know that others who really care about people are aware of your post.
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:47 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by wowineedhelp
    ever since 2 years ago ive been in trouble

    Let me start with this --

    What do you mean by being "in trouble"? Do you mean with how your family members think of you and how they treat you? Or do you mean something else, like with school or with the police?
  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:48 PM
    Chery
    Hi dear,
    At 17, you've been a druggie? You are overweight?. and apparently you've developed a very fast style of communication. I had a little trouble following you because of your hurried texting.

    You use the word 'hate' a lot.. Where did your self-respect go, and when did it take such a turn. Could it be that you did not like the idea of your biological parents breaking up and now you have a problem with your father's new life? Is that maybe why you've given up on your life, except for your girlfriend?

    At your age, with so much confusion and helplessness, you really need to talk to someone near you on a regular basis to get yourself acquainted with who you are and what you want in life. It is going to take a while for you and it will be a lot of work, but if you start now, you'll not regret it.

    Talk to your parents and tell them that your present state and attitude is not working for you and that you need professional help to straighten out your life. They have a responsibility to help you, so don't hesitate.

    It's great that your girlfriend is supportive and caring, but you need more than just that. And believe me, if she is for real, she will understand that you need to work with yourself. She will probably help you and wait for you, if not, then she does not understand the severity of your issue.

    School and work will also be better once you've started liking yourself. And, that, young man, is the first thing you should start working on. You must see yourself as NO LOSER, just a confused individual who needs a bit of assistance in getting back on a better track of life.

    See what groups, counselors, and other professionals are in your area and make a plan for yourself.

    I hope that you get the help you deserve, you have a right to be a happy person physically and emotionally, and don't let anyone tell you different.

    Keep us posted. We'll help all we can here, but I believe that you should also seek help from a professional you can trust.

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  • Oct 13, 2007, 02:59 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Welll the past 2 years of my life I have realized a lot of things are wrong I'm not over weight I'm really skinny for my age actually it just bothers me that they say that I've been in the mental hospital because of them for a week I flipped out cause they were calling my girl friend names like a whore and and she doesn't do anything to them my dads parents fought a lot and my real mom and dad split when I was 9 and my dad got re married and so did my mom I've always had a grudge against both of my parents so reason I keep personal my dad is over weight and my sisters boy friend is always saying I will turn out like him and so does my sister and Wondergirl the past 2 years I've been involved with drugs and probabtion because I acted out in school as the class clown or a fighter I've cleaned up and I have a lot of self respect now but I just don't like anything about my family or what they do I hate them and I don't want to be apart of my family all they do is tell me to live with my mom or they want to send me to a foster home I'm a really good kid at least that's what my mom says and my girl friends mom I do play spots like football and I play gutair bass and drums I don't know why my family hates me so much I mean I do nothing to them unless they start in with me if they call me something I have to fight back its just my reaction I don't trust anyone it's a personal problem I have and I just don't like my family those are my problems if you guys want to help me out more I would total be happy to talk with you guys
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:10 PM
    Clough
    Are you currently taking any medications? If so, what medications, please?
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:11 PM
    Clough
    If you play guitar, bass and drums, I can definitely identify with you there. I am also a musician.
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:17 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Yep seroquel concerta and seterline
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:18 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Nice I love what I do I play in a band
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:21 PM
    Clough
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by wowineedhelp
    yep seroquel concerta and seterline

    What are you taking these for?

    Also, I do want to thank you for your short responses. It is much easier for people to get a handle on your situation if we just take things one at a time or in bits and pieces, rather than the many facets of your situation and troubles that you are having all at once.
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:23 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Well one is for depression another is for adhd and the seraquel is for bi polar
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:23 PM
    Clough
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by wowineedhelp
    nice i love what i do i play in a band

    What kind of places does the band play at? Also, do these other musicians that you play with help you to try and figure out what to do about the problems that you are having?
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:26 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Anything we can mostly just shows we get invited to and my band members are all my best friends and they do everything they can for me I stay at our lead gutiarest house whenever me and my family get into huge fights so yeah they help me a bunch
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:29 PM
    Wondergirl
    Is there some way you can become a peacemaker? If someone tries to pick a fight, don't go with it. Walk away or get busy doing something useful. If you feel like ragging on someone, leave the room or do something constructive.
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:30 PM
    wowineedhelp
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    Is there some way you can become a peacemaker? If someone tries to pick a fight, don't go with it. Walk away or get busy doing something useful. If you feel like ragging on someone, leave the room or do something constructive.


    I try to just walk away sometimes it works sometimes they just come and bug me when I practice my drums or something or do something useful
  • Oct 13, 2007, 03:33 PM
    Clough
    How old are your other siblings?

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