Me and my boyfriend are 19.. he's not a partier but sometimes I can be. I used to party and drink every other weekend before we started going out but I stopped when I started dating him because he didn't really like it unless he was around. Plus he doesn't want me doing anything that's bad for me or my health. Understandable. So we've been in a serious relationship for ten months.. but we were best friends in high school since sophomore year so I know the whole deal with the "youll never marry ur high school sweetheart" okay okay but that has nothing to do with this... soo no answers like that..

The problem:
After 10 months of only drinking a total of 3 times with him and only at weddings, I decided to go to a party last night because I haven't gone and I missed some of my friends. I got pretty drunk and this girl (who is a lesbien who loves to make out with girls at parties) dragged me into one of the bedrooms and started talking to me. So I talked back but then she started kissing me and I couldn't really stop because I knew what I was doing but I felt too drunk to make the right decision. It was like about 4 minutes total probably of making out so it wasn't bad but we did tongue and she had her hand up my shirt and down my pants (she kept saying please to let her do other things to me but I was able to say no). We stopped at that was it.. I passed out woke up went home. I told my boyfriend about the party but not about the kissing thing. I didn't tell him about the kissing thing because he got pissed about the party. So I figured if I told him about the kissing he would probably break up with me or be really hurt. We just ended our phone conversation and it wasn't that great... but I Just don't know if I should tell him. It was 4 minutes of kissing and stopping and me saying no but I couldn't completely stop and I don't like girls I mean I was always curious but I learned my lesson and I know I don't like girls now and that it was okay to experiement but I don't know if I should just not tell him and forget it happened or if I should tell him. Some of my friends say to tell him.. and some say don't because it was only 4 minutes and I didn't want to anyway. Please help?:(

What you did was wrong.

You did cheat on your boyfriend,
Even if it was with a gril or you had too much to drink
You cheated.

Of course you should tell him and see how he takes it.

You need to tell him. Its cheating whether you are with a male or female. Its still kissing someone else. The sooner you tell him the better. And honestly if you love him could you deal with the guilt of him not knowing about this say on your wedding day? It isn't fair to keep secrets like this because you fear breaking up you did the wrong thing its time to fess up and let him make a decision. You made yours. 4 minutes is a long time. If you didn't want to - you wouldn't have. Simple.

Yes, and lucky a lot more did not happen since you passed out.

Not the behavior most boyfriends would ever want their girlfriend to do.

And the problem I see , I am not sure this type of thing could not happen again, since there is no real remorse, no statement that you are not going to party again, and so on.

Yes yes you made a mistake so tell him. Tell him soon and either be prepared to give up parties all together because of this or your BF.

You are still young and it's very hard to give up those kinds of things at this age so think pretty hard on this and don't waste any more of this guys time if your not ready for a real commitment.

No the thing is I do feel really bad and I'm taking ownership in it... I told him I wouldn't party again and I honestly don't want to after that. And I guess 4 minutes is long.. but when I just spoke to her she said it was more like 20 seconds because I kept talking and telling her to stop which I was unaware of. And also.. I was drunk and she was not. So does 20 seconds change anything?

First thing, being drunk is not an excuse! If you can't handle your alcohol then simply don't drink, it's like knowing you can't swim but jumping in a pool without any help, it's just not smart.

Second, I've been pretty wasted in my time, while I'm LEGALLY old enough to drink! And never have I done something like that or cheated on a person I dated.

Third, you cheated and your looking for justification, which there is none. Accept the responsibility for your actions and tell him.

Fourth, you are blaming everyone else except yourself. You are obviously not mature enough to accept responsibility so obviously you're not mature enough to drink either.

Listen you did the big mistake in your life not to listen someone who cares about you , how do you feel now cheating with someone it's hurt right well I'm sorry you did bad thing very bad for me as a man I would say don't tell him he walk away from you , I'm sorry that what happen if you don't listen to the people who cares about you and love you and your boy friend was clean guy but you burn every thing up

All you can do is hope your boyfriend don't mind it.

*I knew that song would cause a lot of no good... *

What a lesson you have learned about how you act when drinking. Your good to go for anything. Don't forget it.

Since you have chosen to tell some friends about this, maybe its better to come clean with your b/f , but be ready to live with the consequences of your actions, even if you get off lightly with "I told you so" from him.

What's the difference of that or maybee there was a cute guy you thought you might like, but you didn't no so you guys kissed cause you wanted to but you realized you didn't like him... OR kiss a girl because you didn't know if you liked her and now you realized you didn't... cheating is cheating.. tell your boyfriend, its not fair for him not to know and to be with someone who is lying to him.