I need to write a letter to a friend who has a terminal illness.

What can I say in such a situation?

It depends on how close you two are,

If you are very close and he/she knows that he/she does not have much time, then send a prayer written for him/her,
A prayer for peace in life and after death.
And a thank you for the memories you two have together,let him/her know what you appreciate and love about him/her.

Are you male or female? Is the friend male or female?

Is this your first contact with your friend since you found out he/she's dying? Will you be writing more letters to this friend, or is this your goodbye letter?

Wondergirl-
We are both male. It will be my first contact since I found out that he is dying. I fear this will be a goodbye letter.

Tell him you were shocked to hear the news (or however you want to phase that--I'm female, so I don't think like a male). Write some positive memories of better times when the two of you had fun together -- be specific and colorful, get him to laugh.

Sort of like this --

Dear Bob --

I was shocked to hear the news and am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

You have been such an important part of my life and are in many of my memories. Remember that night you and Bill and I snuck into Mr. Meyer's pasture and tipped over three of his prize dairy cows? I've never laughed so hard in my life when one of the calves butted Bill and knocked him over. The calf must have been objecting to what happened to his mama. And then there was the county fair. Oh my! [Etc.]

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Tell him you were shocked to hear the news (or however you want to phase that--I'm female, so I don't think like a male). Write some positive memories of better times when the two of you had fun together -- be specific and colorful, get him to laugh.

Sort of like this --

Dear Bob --

I was shocked to hear the news and am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

You have been such an important part of my life and are in many of my memories. Remember that night you and Bill and I snuck into Mr. Meyer's pasture and tipped over three of his prize dairy cows? I've never laughed so hard in my life when one of the calves butted Bill and knocked him over. The calf must have been objecting to what happened to his mama. And then there was the county fair. Oh my! [Etc.]

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Wondergirl, you just hit me with a mighty power. I don't think I would have thought about it as simple as that but that was so perfect. Thanks. And Gollum, take good care, I am sorry about your friend. Hugs, Start

I did that once and it ended up being the eulogy at my grandfather's funeral. Unfortunately it got to him an hour after he passed.

Make sure it is heartfelt, make sure you include the good times, memories that will make his family, friends and loved ones laugh. Do not concentrate on the sad times, only the good.

Mine went something like this (as far as I can remember, I chose not to save it so that it would remain between me and him (he was buried with the letter)...

Dear Grampa... It's me, your little ballerina... I was thinking recently about our trip to Alabama for vacation. Remember the 8-track tape player? I was so stuck on Barry Manilow, all you could do was call him Hook Nose. It's been a while, but I want to apologize for the 14 hours of torture I put you through on that trip down there.

It ended up being 5 pages long (on legal paper, front and back), it took weeks to compile. But at the funeral there were very few tears and quite a few laughs.

Make sure you let him know how much he will be missed and try to cheer him up. If he knows he doesn't have much time left then he's probably pretty sad.

I like all the answers on here. J, I bet your letter was great. I am now thinking of the people I love. I fear some are old and it is going to be a great loss with them gone, but the gain while they are here is unforgettable.