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    brokerbytheminute's Avatar
    brokerbytheminute Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Sep 18, 2006, 08:30 PM
    Proper etiquette
    One of my closest friends is getting married and I am in the wedding party. Things are getting quite pricey between dress, shoes, bridal shower, bachlorette party, not to mention the cost of the hotel room for the weekend. The reception is at a very nice place and unfortunately that nice place comes with a nice price tag. She is paying about $150 per plate. My boyfriend and I are both attending so if we want to cover our plate it will be about $300. So I guess my question is the bridal party expected to give gifts after spending over $1000 on all other expenses?
    CaptainForest's Avatar
    CaptainForest Posts: 3,645, Reputation: 393
    Ultra Member

    Sep 18, 2006, 09:18 PM
    I would have thought that the bride/groom would pay for the bridesmaids dresses.

    I assume the hotel is not where you live? Hence the staying in the room?

    So, don't give 300 bucks. Give 200.

    Rule Number 1: Give what you can afford. If you can not afford all this, TELL HER. Maybe she should pay for the bridal shower (or her mother or whatever)

    If it is going to cause you a huge financial burden, then do NOT do it.

    I don't care who she is, weddings should NOT bankrupt anyone. But, unfortunately, they sometimes do.
    BlueRuby's Avatar
    BlueRuby Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Sep 27, 2006, 09:00 AM
    Technically, bridesmaids are responsible for their own attire... I wouldn't feel obligated, however, to cover your plate cost! That's not how gifts are suppsed to work! $100.00 should be plenty. Or, if you really can't afford it, $50. A gift might be better because the price isn't obvious.
    starryeyed's Avatar
    starryeyed Posts: 49, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member

    Oct 4, 2006, 11:55 AM
    If you're close, old friends, it's possible to give an amazing present that doesn't cost much at all...
    If you're childhood friends you could do make something like a recipe book of childhood recipes, with memories you share for each recipe...
    Or you could make the bride and groom a photographic history of their lives - baby photos, how they met, what their story is... up until a spot for them to put their wedding photos... Together with a written narrative - their own fairytale picturebook... It doesn't have to be expensive to be meaningful! And that's a much more valuable gift than cutlery...

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