Please help me should I wait? I have a boyfriend who wants me to. Im 12 and mature. Hes 14. Should I?

I would not suggest having sex at 12. Sex at that age could lead to many problems psychologically in life, in your future relationships and in other things as well. Do YOU want to have sex at your age? What is your reason behind it? There is no right age for sex, as it depends on the person's belief, relationship, desire, communication, MANY aspects of their relationship with theirself and their partner. But at 12 years old, I would seriously not recommend having sex. Do you have your period? What if you got an STD or pregnant? What if you didn't fully want to have sex and then you did? What if your relationship ends 2 days later? What if you love him or what if you don't love him? What if you have many serious issues in several years with relationships- with your parents, with a boyfriend, husband, friends, etc. There's so many things to consider, but at age 12 you are very young and really should not be sexually active. And your boyfriend is 2 years older which many people will most likely touch upon. It is not a matter really of being mature exactly or not, if you are or aren't it is a matter of many complex things, but at your age especially I really would NOT think you should. Thank you.

Think of being 12, and getting pregnant. Think of long term consequences, and the very real risk of you becoming pregnant. Think of the complications because nature did not make your body at age 12 (because it is still growig), to have a baby. Think of where this 14 year old boy will be, with no income other than at best, a paper route. Think of going through labour, pushing a baby out of yourself, and the excruciating pain. Think of stiches, think of milk coming in your breasts, think of breast feeding, diaper changing, feedings every few hours, 24 hours around the clock. Think of no more social life, no more childhood, and being responsible for another human being, for the rest of your life. Think of the baby having to come first in everything you say, do, plan. You will be second behind all of your friends who did not have a baby, and they will quickly disappear from your life, because you no longer have the same priorities. Your life, as you know it, will be changed forever.

THAT is the risk you take. You are thinking about something that you have no business doing. When you are educated, earning an income, have money in the bank, are independent and self sufficient, with preferably a husband first, then, and only then, after careful planning and preparation for the expense and life changing experience, should you even think about risking getting pregnant. It is inexcuseable for you to take a risk that will likely have your parents footing the bill, and teaching you how to feed, bathe, dress and care for a baby.

And why. You can't say no? You can't control yourself better than an animal in heat? You want to put out for a boy because... why? Just what motivates you to have sex, and risk getting pregnant. You are not mature enough in any way to consider sex as part of your childhood.

Are you willing to ask your mother for advice, maybe see if she can foot the bill for your birth control pills? What would she say, and would she allow you to even date this 14 year old- does she know about him? What kind of mess would you be in if she found out, that at age 12, you were sexually active. What would those consequences be. Would she have to contact his parents for child support because he's too young to have a paycheque- or would she be stuck footing the bill, along with taxpayer welfare of some description. How would your father react, his father, your friends, etc.

Having sex is assuming a risk of becoming pregnant. You cannot ignore that fact. Even if your mother did buy you birth control, no birth control is 100%, as many women (not children) but women, have found out the hard way.

Don't have sex unless you are first able to understand what you are risking. For you, and more importantly, for a life you could bring into this world.

The last thing a baby needs is a 12 year old mother.

To answer your question. The right age is after its legal to marry and you have done so. Otherwise you risk way too many problems with your life.

Simple answer... no you shouldn't... and neither should your boyfriend. He is thinking only of himself, because if you got pregnant, he could walk away (he will tell you that he wouldn't). He is too young to even be able to help support a child. Not to mention that you risk serious physical harm to yourself and a baby if you did become pregnant.

Do not let yourself get talked into having sex. He may tell you that it is OK because you "love" each other... or try to make you feel guilty by saying you must not love him if you won't. He may tell you that he will take precautions so that you don't get pregnant (nothing will prevent pregnancy all the time except not having sex!). He may tell you that he will break up with you if you don't, (if he does, good that you find out he was only using you).

If HE cared about you enough, he wouldn't ask you to do something that can cause so many problems for you and your future.

If you feel any pressure from him, then he should not be your boyfriend.

Well look I lost it when I was 15 and 8 months years old and I regret it because I wanted to be a virgin till I got marry... All I could tell you is that wait till you think you want to do it and if you have your period use not 1 but 2 condums to be really protected but if I was you I wouldn't have sex because it really hurts for your 1st time and if he is asking you to have sex with him he just wants to have it and then leave you... And you shouldn't have sex with him because then he's ganna be telling people and your mom will find out just tell you boyfriend you ain't ready and if he loves you he will understand and if he doesn't leave him...

A bit unrelated from my answer, but this information is incorrect. Using 2 condoms heightens your risk of pregnancy more than using 1 condom, and you should never use 2 condoms that's a basic fact.
But for this thread, I still very much recommend to not have sex.

12, of course not, you are not near old enough and not near mature enough. ( no matter what you think)

Even 14 is not

Its better 2 because if 1 breaks he has another one and you won't be in a risk... and yea she's young but what if she does want to have sex it better to say to use a condum than a just be careful.

>>>>>>its better 2 because if 1 breaks he has another one and you won't be in a risk... and yea she's young but what if she does want to have sex it better to say to use a condum than a just be careful.


MIZZ.CASTANDEA,

I know this sounds like it would make sense, but the reason two at once is not recommended, even by condom manufacturers, is the increased risk of them tearing due to friction between them.

I agree that telling someone to use protection is better than just telling them to be careful, but in this case no one told the OP to be careful. She was told not to have sex at all and the various reasons it would be in her best interest not to. That she came on to ask whether she should, shows that she really already knows it's not a good idea.

Not only should you not even think about having sex until you're much older, you need to get your 14 year old boyfriend to stop putting any pressure on you to do it. One thing you're not too young to do is practice a little self discipline and self control. That will come in handy in your future. That means one of you has to teach the other the meaning of the word "NO".

First, NO ONE should be engaging in sexual intercourse until they are physically, financially and emotionally ready to have a child. You fail in all three.

Second, do your parents know you have a boyfriend? At 12 you are too young to be dating let alone having sex. And a 14 yr old boy having sex risks jail. Any boy pressuring you for sex should be dumped immediately.

And I will also add that if I knew that my 12 year old daughter was even considering this behavior, I would be sitting down with her boyfriends parents asap and we would be discussing what we need to do to fix this problem. You kids might think you have all the answers, but believe it or not you don't. Your still children, and may have entirely too much freedom. But you do need guidance that should come from your parents. And you might not listen to any of us, but you might listen to your mother or father.

Where on earth are your RESPONSIBLE PARENTS that are allowing a 12 yr. old girl to be alone with a boy and to be put in such an awkward position? SAD!

I'm 13 and personally I would not have sex at your age no matter how mature I thought I was. Seriously you have to think about the serious consequences. I would wait until I was older and an adult to do something like that. Because losing your verginity is something speacial why waste it at the age of 12? I'm sure you can wait till you're an adult. Trust me you will happy that you waited. Seriously!

One more point to add. Sex is not recreation. Sexual intimacy is something that should be shared ONLY with someone you are in a deep committed relationship with.

At 12 I wonder how long you you have been with this "boyfriend". It can't be long enough to have established such a relationship. And as mature as you might think you are, you are not mature enough for such a relationship. Which makes it even more a matter of he probably just wants to get into your pants. And once you allow it, he will drop you.

Tell him you are not ready yet and see how long he remains your boyfriend.

Please come back and tell us that you have heeded out advice. We are concerned about you.

NO! Wait 'till you're married. Sex should be reserved for marriage ONLY not for 12-year-olds.