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    Lexilulu's Avatar
    Lexilulu Posts: 69, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Apr 28, 2010, 10:06 AM
    How to act around a guy so that he feels comfortable
    Asking another boy-related question, of course. Sorry:)
    Okay, I'm a major tomboy, I like hanging out with guys that don't start useless drama like most girls. But I don't know if they are comfortable around me though. Most new guy friends are super shy around me, and occasionally crack a joke. I don't act like a girly girl almost ever, but I do like doing my hhair and putting on a small amounts of eyeliner. But how should I act around guys so that they feel comfortable around me?
    excon's Avatar
    excon Posts: 21,482, Reputation: 2992
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    #2

    Apr 28, 2010, 10:12 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Lexilulu View Post
    But how should I act around guys so that they feel comfortable around me?
    Hello L:

    You act like yourself. You don't want 'em to like you cause they think you're somebody else, do you? You want 'em to like you, because you're YOU. If they DON'T like you, because you're YOU, throw 'em to the curb. You don't need to pander to get friends.

    excon
    Lexilulu's Avatar
    Lexilulu Posts: 69, Reputation: 6
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    #3

    Apr 28, 2010, 01:05 PM

    This makes a lot of sense. But when I am myself, they get shy. I don't want to change myself completely, but I would like to know what guys are most comfortable to be around. Like now, I'm talkative and make a lot of physical contact *Like putting a hand on their shoulder, punching them lightly, one armed hugs, high fives(soo many high fives), fist bumps, etc etc, you get the point:)*, I have to have eye contact when I'm talking to someone, and most recently, I stare (actually I start daydreaming about something and then I realize I have been starring at someone for the last few minutes. I know when I use to be shy I use to be uncomfortable when someone would touch me or even talk to me. Now I've come out of that and I don't know when a guy is feeling akward around me or if he is just shy. Like I said before, I don't plan on changing myself completely, just so that I won't make people feel uncomfortable when I'm around them. Thanks, Lexi:)
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
    Experts
     
    #4

    Apr 28, 2010, 01:10 PM

    Most likely, they're shy at first because they're not sure how you'll react to things. If you show them that guy-talk doesn't bother you, then they should loosen up.

    If you're worried about physical contact throwing them off, then try to limit it until you've been around each other longer and he's seen the way you act with the rest of your friends.
    geezhenry's Avatar
    geezhenry Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Apr 28, 2010, 02:00 PM

    If you find yourself starirng at a guy he's probably not for you. All you have to do is what you're doing. Believe me. Guys like girls that aren't afraid to be a little physical. You seem to be friendly enough, don't go overboard though. Guys don't like a pushy girl. Keep talking. Find out what he likes and go with it. You're having fun and that's what the teen years are all about. :)
    Lexilulu's Avatar
    Lexilulu Posts: 69, Reputation: 6
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    #6

    Apr 30, 2010, 09:22 AM

    Thank you for the help! I was also wondering, can this be a stage? Because I have noticed the difference between hanging out with cocky, horny, 13 year olds, and shy 16 year olds. Thanks again, Lexi:)

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