[YourDarkMystery]

I've known him for a while and he's one of those boys who doesn't say a lot, but when he does he says too much, he's perverted and does drugs. It kills me because I care about him A lot. I always had a thing for him, but when I try to help, give advise or be there for him, he pushes away.

He always tells me how much he loves me. (I don't by into it tho) evn if he did, I want him to get better and then id love to start somthin with him

But this is where I question - why does he push away?

Is it because he's so use to being alone, he's afraid of having somthin, and having that fear of loosin it?

Is he still immature? I don't want him to die. It kills me to evn think that. I tell him all the time.

I just need advise, I'm scared, I love him, I just want him to be OK. And now that I'm 3,000 miles away I'm afraid to talk to him about it, because hel just ignore me. Do I care too much?

Please help

Thank you.

[JBeaucaire]

I know you like him, but the "like" part is automatic. It's not an intelligent choice, it's something that's happening on its own. I need you to admit that so you can make the next part happen smartly.

The intelligent choice part is when you get to know someone (whom you already like, beside the point), when you get to know how they really are... then you decide "if this is who they are and they never change, they stay exactly the same, is this what I want to hang around?"

It's got to be that simple. You only get a certain number of "inner circle" friends, the ones who are closest to you and actually influencing you for good or bad. Make choices to let in people who are influencing you for good.

He's perverted and does drugs, pushes you away when you try to be "helpful." The "why" part is you just trying to ignore the "what". You can't change him, so you're choices have to be smarter than the chemistry.