[cal823]

I'm 15, creative, and quite independent and I hate it when adults interfere, and I'm in year 11 doing some TEE subjects and some non TEE
My parents are quite intrusive, they go through my bag and my room, and my dad knocks on my door, then enters the room without waiting for an answer, defeating the purpose of knocking. They enter my room whenever they want to, even when I want to be left alone or when I want privacy. They always try and interfere with my school/assignements, and constantly bug me and waste my time with this stuff, often taking hours of my time to go through stuff that should only take a few minutes. Everything has strings attached with them, they might ask me to do something, in a non commanding way, like its not something I have to do, but when I say no (I only say no if its an unreasonable request or I have more important things to do, like school work) they say "Ill remember that when you want something"
They don't speak nicely to me, they just yell and command and shriek, and when I try to talk to them about this, or try to ask them to be nicer or just listen to me, they laugh at me, or call me rude and disrespectful.
Im not even allowed to have an opinion, they just laugh at me.
They expect me to "Show some respect, be nice to us" when they treat me like I'm nothing, and refuse to be polite to me.
I work better if I'm left alone by parents, if I can organise my time without interference, when my parents interfere, they just get in the way.

[phillysteakandcheese]

In just a few years, you will be a legal adult and can leave this situation knowing you were being reasonable, respectful, and worthy of trust.

In the interim - It might be good to take a step back and take a good look at yourself and try to understand you parent's perspective. I would hope they at least think they are acting in your best interests, even if they don't understand or under-estimate you.

[ilovebyu]

Hi,
I'm really sorry that your parents act that way. I really can't realate, but my grandma puts her nose into everybody's business, not just mine. She really bugs me, and continues to. My best advice is to just grin and bare with it... I'm sorry, I can't think of more.

Just think... work super hard in high school, and then when you move out you can move a million miles away from your parents if you really want to.

[Bluerose]

I know things seem difficult for you just now but when you are a parent you will understand a parent's concerns for their child. I believe your parents are trying to keep you safe and take care of you until you can take care of yourself. That is what good parents do.

Perhaps it is time to have a grown up chat with them. This will reassure them and show them that you are growing up and becoming responsible for your own welfare. There is no harm in asking for a little more privacy. Speak calmly and clearly, do not whine or demand. Think through what you would like to say to them before hand.

Respect is not a god given right, it has to be earned. Start earning it now by putting yourself in your parents shoes.

Some say, too much attention is better than none at all.

[cal823]

Thanks for the advice, the "grown up chat thing" is what I've tried many times. I never whine or demand, its not dignified lolz.

[ally123]

Haha I had this problem but I'm younger then you I'm 13 and my parents never listen asked my big sis what to do I went <pretend> goth scared the out of them and one day they sat me down for a talk and I brought up the privacy thing and it went the way it should be I have my privacy they have a happy daughter

[cal823]

Lol, I went self harmy emosih, but it wasn't fake and it wasn't because of this, and nothing changed.

[chris_in_orbit]

O_O; um OK. Some of the advice you've gotten is a little disturbing. I've had this same problem with my mother. The biggest issue is that both sides are not hearing the other side and there is no compromise made. You've stated all of what your parents have done wrong but you haven't admitted to anything you may not be doing right. And don't say you're a perfect angel because no child is. Take a moment and think about what it is your not doing that they want from you.
Go to them and tell them "Hey when you get the chance can we all sit down and talk?" Don't ask for it right away. Once the time comes sit them down and tell them what you've been doing wrong and make a compromise. Not everything is going to go your way. That is something that has to be learned in order for any relationship to work (and it sucks that your parents haven't learned this for themselves but don't hold it against them because they are human.) Make a conscious effort to do the things they want from you and expect in return they will make a conscious effort to do the things YOU want. Its like you were saying before, you say no to them when their request seems outlandish to you or you have something more important on your plate. Look in their perspective: Having a child ask them to knock on a door that belongs to THEM because the house is indeed THEIRS seems pretty damn outlandish to me. So ask them if they can knock and respect your privacy, in return you do the things they ask of you.
If they STILL don't listen to you after this, and I sincerely doubt they won't listen, then you're just going to have to clench your teeth and ride out this last year you have with them. Having a good relationship with your parents is important, I undersand how you feel truly. I wouldn't have wanted to leave my mothers house on bad terms and having no plans to ever see her again. Well that's all from me.