I came home again today around 3pm and m 17 year old was not home. I can't believe she would live so recklessly. In this day and age, we have talked about the safety aspect of it. Boy, have I blown it.

If you're asking how to get your teen to tell you where she is going when she leaves the house - don't give her a choice. If she doesn't tell you where she's going, she doesn't haver permission to go. If she goes anyway, she comes home to find her iPod (or whatever) has been taken away and locked up. Then her computer, then her TV, and so on. If you stick with it, it will get through to her.

Warning her about safety will only sink in so far; so many teens think they are immune to the harmful things in the world, so telling her "You could get kidnapped or raped or murdered!" may not sink in. Best to bring up stories of girls her age who go missing or have harm done to them in a neutral environment, like over dinner ("Did you hear about that girl three town over who was walking home and got attacked? How scary....").

If you can afford it, get her a cell phone with a GPS tracker. Don't tell her it has a GPS tracker, because if she knows she might not carry it with her everywhere. Then you can log onto the internet and figure out just where she is...

You haven't blown it, you just need to try new tactics!

She's probabley fine, at the worst she's probably out with her friends just partying or something trying too feel rebelious. You should just talk too her don't get angry teens exspecially hate that just let her know that you have been really worried about her and set up a plan like maybe she has too write a note or at least call like before a certain time for her safety and yourself also. But whatever you do don't give her a lecture you don't want too push her anymore; teenagers have enough problems these days they don't need parents, yelling at them just make sure to be there for her no matter what.

I'm sorry but that story about 3 towns over does not work it will just make her want too go out looking for trouble so she can show her mother that she's fine and she's and adult, and a gps tracker she would hate even more would you like your parents tracking you down where ever you go you want too make sure she knows she has your trust.

Lik my point about bringing up a story about a missing girl is to do it in a neutral environment; not to stand over her and scold, "Look what could happen to you!" but to talk about it in casual conversation, as one would discuss the weather. That way, mom isn't saying directly, "Look what could happen to you!" but rather "Look what happened to this girl, how scary." The daughter can then make her own conclusion about her safety. If the story isn't directed TO her, but just in her presence, it may have a different effect.

As far as the GPS tracker, the daughter has shown she cannot be trusted. She leaves without telling anyone where she is going. Yes, she will hate a GPS tracker, which is why she doesn't get to know it's there.

Um... trust has to be EARNED.

Of course her mom can't trust her! She can't even write a note or make a call to let her mom know she's okay!

As far as "kids have so much to deal with today without parents...blah blah blah"... well TOUGH. Parents need to be parents, too. PARENTS have too much to deal with these days for their kids to think they can do whatever the heck they please.

I agree that if her daughter can't live by her rules (ie, checking in and letting the mom know where she is), then she doesn't get any privileges either. First thing to go would be the car (or car privileges), then the music, then the TV... Life is tough. Her daughter will learn to deal with it better if she understands that there are rules.

You're daughter seems irrespnsible, but than again she is 17. I am not saying that's an excuse, Im saying that's an excuse for her. Your daughter proably feels that she's already an adult when sdhes still a teen. You should sit down with her and talk to her as a friend, a responsible friend though, like "Honey, I know youre growing up... but I just want you to be safe" if she gets mad or plays along w/o actually changing, start grounding her like taking aaway possesions. She shouldn't feel like she has no boundries justr because she's not 10 anympre doesn't mean she's 21.

Saddly I would have to say you only have a few options

1. Do what my Mom did. Kick her out. For her own good. Honestly it helped me.

2. Keep the lock and key on her I mean serious! Get her a babysitter send her to relatives don't let her spend one second that you can't account for.

Don't let her walk all over you

Thanks, for all the answers this time . It worked out I took her phone. Today, waited until I came home then asked to go hang out with her boyfriend. How hard was that. It doesn't last but I will take her TV and iPod if it happens a gain.

Exactly! You take away the good things in their life if they don't want to respect you. The problem with teens today is that there aren't more parents like you. I commend you and your willingness to protect her.