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    Ela2219's Avatar
    Ela2219 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 4, 2012, 08:05 AM
    Sexuality Question
    Hi, I have been searching and searching for a website were I can ask a question on sexual proplems feely and get advice any one know a website? Or can I ask it here? (Iam only 14 female)
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Mar 4, 2012, 08:29 AM
    Depends on the question - and you are on the teen site, which is good.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #3

    Mar 4, 2012, 09:22 AM
    So what is your question?
    Ela2219's Avatar
    Ela2219 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Mar 4, 2012, 09:29 AM
    Is this considered a pedophile?
    Hi, something is bugging me and I need an answer from anoutside source. If someone around 14 is only atracted to boys 8-12, is that considered a teen pedo? Idk cuase usually pedos are over 18 therfore aking their status illegal if they were to do anything. I just need to know because I have never been "attracted" to kids my own age... Only younger ones... Am I going to stay like this 'tilI'm 18?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #5

    Mar 4, 2012, 11:21 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Ela2219 View Post
    Hi, something is bugging me and I need an answer from anoutside source. If someone around 14 is only atracted to boys 8-12, is that considered a teen pedo? Idk cuase usually pedos are over 18 therfore aking their status illegal if they were to do anything. I just need to know because I have never been "attracted" to kids my own age.... Only younger ones... Am I going to stay like this 'tilI'm 18?

    First, I don't know if you are a male attracted to young boys or a female attracted to young boys.

    And what do you mean by "attracted?" Dating, sexually, being friends, something else?

    I'm not trying to pick you apart. I'm just trying to understand what you are asking. If you are a male (or female, for that matter) attracted to younger males the attraction probably won't stop when you are 18. That is not a magic age where one sense of attraction ends and another begins. Pedophiles also ACT on their impulses. It's not a question of liking or being attracted - it's ACTING on those feelings.

    I don't know what you mean by "Idk cuase usually pedos are over 18 therfore aking their status illegal if they were to do anything" Any assault on a minor - no matter "your" age, no matter the minor's age - is a sexual assault. For example, a 14 year old and an 8 year old, that's sexual assault if there is sexual activity. The charge could also be at a higher, more explicit level. I don't know, I've never read, that "usually" pedophiles (the correct term) are over 18.

    I think I need some more info in order to give you an opinion. Are you comfortable posting more?
    Ela2219's Avatar
    Ela2219 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Mar 4, 2012, 08:09 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee
    First, I don't know if you are a male attracted to young boys or a female attracted to young boys.

    And what do you mean by "attracted?" Dating, sexually, being friends, something else?

    I'm not trying to pick you apart. I'm just trying to understand what you are asking. If you are a male (or female, for that matter) attracted to younger males the attraction probably won't stop when you are 18. That is not a magic age where one sense of attraction ends and another begins. Pedophiles also ACT on their impulses. It's not a question of liking or being attracted - it's ACTING on those feelings.

    I don't know what you mean by "Idk cuase usually pedos are over 18 therfore aking their status illegal if they were to do anything" Any assault on a minor - no matter "your" age, no matter the minor's age - is a sexual assault. For example, a 14 year old and an 8 year old, that's sexual assault if there is sexual activity. The charge could also be at a higher, more explicit level. I don't know, I've never read, that "usually" pedophiles (the correct term) are over 18.

    I think I need some more info in order to give you an opinion. Are you comfortable posting more?
    Hi thanks for answering. I'm brand new to this site and can't get haw to reply to your reply O_O lol >quote isolated for you<
    Reply: For one yes, I am a girl, I am not gay or bisexual. Second, attracted as in just a crush or "likeing someone" lol. And finally no I will not act on my actions because I go to a private catholic schooland don't plan to become sexualy active until I am married. And yea I don't really become friends with the boys because they are not in my class and next year is high school. I am just worried I feel really impure and wrong every time I think about this, I guess I just need some closure. Thanks
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #7

    Mar 5, 2012, 04:47 AM
    At 14 you have raging hormones. If the attraction you feel is romantic and not sexual, then I don't see a problem. It probably just means that you are not as mature as you may think you are. And older boys intimidate you. Or it may be more of a control issue. You may feel you can control a younger boy.

    In any case, I do think you would benefit from talking to a therapist about these feelings. I believe there is a root cause that you need to get at.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #8

    Mar 5, 2012, 09:10 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Ela2219 View Post
    Hi thanks for answering. I'm brand new to this site and can't get haw to reply to your reply O_O lol >quote isolated for you<
    Reply: For one yes, I am a girl, I am not gay or bisexual. Second, attracted as in just a crush or "likeing someone" lol. And finally no I will not act on my actions becuase I go to a private catholic schooland do'nt plan to become sexualy active until I am married. And yea I don't really become friends with the boys because they are not in my class and next year is high school. I am just worried I feel really impure and wrong every time I think about this, I guess I just need some closure. Thanks


    I'm finding a kind way to say this. I was raised Roman Catholic so I understand the "impure" and "wrong" part. There is nothing impure or wrong in liking someone younger... or older... or anything in between. I always had a problem with what is and what is not an impure thought. I think it's acting on thoughts that become a problem.

    At any rate what you are experiencing, feeling, is natural. Don't beat yourself up over it.

    I never argue or discuss religion but the "impure thought" area has always troubled me.

    You're "normal" or "natural" or whatever category that is... you don't need to worry.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #9

    Mar 18, 2012, 10:27 AM
    Threads merged

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