Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    shakeelm922's Avatar
    shakeelm922 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 18, 2014, 01:16 AM
    Would You Help To Make This Letter Better, Please?
    My salary has increased since Jan 2013. But my work permit still with the previous salary. So I am going to write letter to update it.
    Subject: - Request to update salary on Work permit
    Dear Sir,
    With all due respect, I would like to inform you that my work permit salary is not matching with what I am getting, as my salary has been increased 18 months ago.
    My work permit is going to expire three months later. So, it is requested you, please update my new work permit as per my actual salary.
    Thank you
    Sincerely,
    Catsmine's Avatar
    Catsmine Posts: 3,827, Reputation: 739
    Pest Control Expert
     
    #2

    Jun 18, 2014, 02:08 AM
    Rather than starting with "Dear Sir," it is more professional to use "Sir/Ma'am:" with the semicolon.

    You could skip "I would like to inform you that my work permit salary is not matching with what I am getting, as" and simply inform them of your salary increase.

    To make subject and verb agree, you might wish to change the "three months later" to "within three months."
    smearcase's Avatar
    smearcase Posts: 2,392, Reputation: 316
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jun 18, 2014, 01:06 PM
    I agree with catsmine's comments. and-
    Instead of subject (usually used in internal memos), use Re: (abbrev for Reference identitifying what the letter is in regard to)
    Don't forget a date for the letter, (near top of page), which makes all other references to time- more easily understood.
    Save the respectfully as a word by itself just before your signature, or simply-"Sincerely"
    'I would like..." followed by anything is a very weak use of English and has become a cliche'.
    As in "I would like to thank you for ..." Better to say "I thank you for...: "would like to" implies that you never quite got to actually doing it.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

How can I make program in java that convert capital letter to small letter [ 2 Answers ]

How can I make program in java that convert capital letter to small letter

Make Quotation Letter [ 4 Answers ]

Write quotation

What do you make of this letter? [ 2 Answers ]

Dear , I am writing to you to warn you to stop being such a jerk. I know we're not friends, but we once were and it just KILLS me that we don't speak anymore and walk around school like the other one doesn't exist. And surely you've realised you acted like a jerk back in the "innocent" days...

How to make a proposal letter [ 0 Answers ]

I would like to ask to all who reads this, on how to make a proposal letter for a catering services. I would like to cater an event, but it needs to have a proposal letter so that the customer would be more like our catering service...

Commitment letter given & contract of buy is signed, can denial letter make/break? [ 4 Answers ]

My parents "were" in the process of selling their home. The buyers had gotten approved for the loan and signed the contract to close on the house. They put down 1/2 of their down payment as one of two. The second payment would be transferred at closing. The shady buyers decided they...


View more questions Search