Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    Canja1211's Avatar
    Canja1211 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Oct 4, 2006, 10:32 PM
    Too early??
    I'm 17 and my boyfriend is 16 and we have been dating for about 3 months, andi know we love each other very much, but is it too early (early as in our relationship early, not our ages) to be talking about having a life together, you know like living together after high school and marriage and such?
    momincali's Avatar
    momincali Posts: 641, Reputation: 242
    Senior Member
     
    #2

    Oct 4, 2006, 10:38 PM
    Way, way, too early. Slow it down. Have fun. Living together at this age will wreck it for sure, even right after high school, too young. What's the hurry?
    Knowledgefinder's Avatar
    Knowledgefinder Posts: 45, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Oct 4, 2006, 10:49 PM
    I too think it's too early to be planning a life together. You both are still young and you don't know what the future is going to hold for the both of you yet. You've only been dating for 3 months, that's not really enough time. Give your relationship more time to grow first.

    Hold off on such thoughts until you're both at least out of high school and you've been dating for a long period.

    It's wonderful to dream of the future, but don't go rushing into anything, wait and see where your future is going to take you first before planning it out.
    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Oct 5, 2006, 12:47 AM
    WAY WAY TOOOOOOOOOO EARLY...
    SLOW DOWN!!

    What's the hurray. If you end up living together now you will just wreck what could be a potentially strong relationship in the future.

    Living alone together has a lot of commitments, too many to consider for teenagers.

    Enjoy the best part now, don't get serious to early.
    Make plans, talk about the future, but there is just NO rush for all of this.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Oct 5, 2006, 02:29 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Canja1211
    im 17 and my boyfriend is 16 and we have been dating for about 3 months, andi know we love eachother very much, but is it too early (early as in our relationship early, not our ages) to be talking about having a life together, you know like living together after high school and marriage and such??
    The short answer is yes it is way to early.

    The problem is at your age you can't understand why because you have the teenage mentality that you know how the world works and your right and everybody else doesn't know anything. You have absolutely no perception of reality because you haven't ever experienced life outside of school or home. We all had it so, it's nothing new and I'm not picking on you but you have so much to learn and experience, and the ONLY way to do it is by living life, getting knocked down, dusting yourself off and getting back up to do it again. I can tell you that after 3 months your not in love but rather in love with the idea of being in love. High school love is much different than real world adult love. I'm not saying you can't find that with this guy but it's way to early to think about the rest of your life together.
    K_3's Avatar
    K_3 Posts: 304, Reputation: 74
    Full Member
     
    #6

    Oct 5, 2006, 03:01 AM
    Most relationships are great for 3 months, they change the next 3 and the next 3 etc. You are young and it is wonderful making plans and dreaming. Unfortantly it is just dreaming and living a fantasy. You are too young to make commitments, read some posts here. There are many hurt people because they were young or started making plans early in a relationship and a few months later one of them wants out and the heartbreak sets in. A person grows so much from the time they get out of high school for a few years that they often do not even have a lot in common with their old friends. Give yourself time to grow up. Do not end up divorced at age 22 with a child or two. Or married and your husband out with the boys each night because you got married too soon. Enjoy dating and have fun. No serious life plans.
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
    Ultra Member
     
    #7

    Oct 5, 2006, 09:26 AM
    Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too early. How qbout having this talk when your 25 - Ok? No sooner. You guys are in lust - love struck.

    So many more people to meet - only setting up for hurt.
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
    Uber Member
     
    #8

    Oct 5, 2006, 05:28 PM
    After only 3 months it's definitely way too early. You hardly know each other yet and you want to talk the rest of your lives together? Slow down or you'll get burned.
    beautifuldiva's Avatar
    beautifuldiva Posts: 79, Reputation: 8
    Junior Member
     
    #9

    Oct 5, 2006, 05:48 PM
    K.. I'll try not to say the same thing as everyone else as you are probably tired of reading it.. lol NOT THAT THEY ARE WRONG!! Lol all are 100% right on.. however maybe a little experience will help here...

    When I was 16 I met the "love of my life". We had been together for, you guessed it three months when we started planning a future together. I put so much of my time and commitment into that relationship. We planeed and we talked about marriage and he even got me a ring. I'm 20 now.. and where is he? I couldn't tell you. Things didn't work out.. I started to feel trapped.. we realized that we were both pushing things and it turned into resentment towards each other.. caused a lot of tension.. (not saying that that would be the case with you two.. ) The thing is we both got wrapped up with the idea of being in love, as mentioned before, and wanted what every teen couple wants.. an adult relationship they think they are capable of handling.

    You sound like an intelligent girl who may very well have plans for yourself after high school. College? Career? Some advice my wise aunt said to me was that at that age it is definitely OK to be selfish! Lol not in that bratty childish way but in the way that you do everything you can to become an independent strong woman who makes opportunities for herself... and has not had to depend on a man or a relationship.

    I know you think that you are in love. And in rare cases, high school sweethearts grow to become happily married.. but how often does that happen? I'm not saying to break up with the guy... but BE FAIR TO Yourself! And to him and give it time... love true love can stand the test of time any lenth of it and if you are meant to be waiting should be an easy task. But please be mindful of these posts... you might save yourself a ton of unnecessary heartache!!

    Best wishes to you
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
    Ultra Member
     
    #10

    Oct 6, 2006, 07:59 AM
    The human brain doesn't stop developng until age 25. There is no reason to plan things at age 16 - just enjoy each other company. Work harder at school - that's the priority. Work harder at your extra caricular activities. Hang with your friends. Don't make this person your life - your way too young... there's going to be a world of heartace soon.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

Early to Mid '90s Sci-Fi [ 1 Answers ]

There was a show about an alien who looked like a human man and he had a companion giant eyeball looking creature who had a glassy reflective front and was constantly harassing the main character about hostility. What was this show?

Early withdrawal [ 5 Answers ]

I need to withdraw my 401 K funds but have been told I can't do it because I am still working for the company. My total is fully vested. I don't qualify for a hardship withdrawel & already have 2 loans on it. Is there anything I can do?

Early invitations... [ 4 Answers ]

Okay, first let me say that our wedding is FAR from traditional. Classy, but all our own. My fiancé and I are having a destination wedding. The guest list consists of 30-32 people, who all happen to be family or part of the bridal party. My initial thought was to send out invitations now. They...

Is This An Early Sign? [ 2 Answers ]

This question is for anyone familiar with tracking ovulation via basal body temp, cervical position & cerv. Mucous. I've been tracking my ovulation this way for the past several months, and I've been pretty predictable by all three factors. This month, it's different... I was 'scheduled' to...

Early discharge [ 8 Answers ]

I live in st. louis, MO and am tryingtoget off probation early,but the judge keeps denying me. Should I get an attorneyorwhat should I do? Anybody know a good attorney that will notcharge me an arm and a leg?


View more questions Search