[donaldray]

Some say that confidence is instilled by a significant other while growing up. Some say confidence happens when you have success at something and you build on that success. Well I didn't draw on a significant other while growing up because Dad didn't have any confidence either. I seem to mirror him as I walk through life although I have had a few succeses in accomplishments. I figure maybe what I'm looking for comes from God but I'm not real sure on that one. Anyway all these inadequacies I feel come to their fullness as I take on something new--for instance a new job. I start Monday on a new job-----where most people are thrilled from the moment they receive news that they have the job, I don't feel good until I know that I can do the job and get along with the people around me. Fortunately the people aspect of this job is only an issue during my 3 day orientation. To this point in my life my confidence is reflected when I speak and the insensitve person picks up on it and it usually down hill from there. The only time I take medication(Xanax) is when I get in these type situations. I'm usually the one who is left out and left standing alone which I've kind of learned to accept but it does create a lot anxiety. In a nutshell----I'm not comfortable in my own skin---neither was my Dad----nor my brother and from what I see of them my sisters are the same way. I don't want to judge myself anymore---I want to be comfortable in my own skin----Any suggestions ?

[BattleAngel14745]

I am sorry that you lack confidence. I know all to well that lack of confidence goes hand in hand with low self esteem. I have suffered with both pretty much my whole life. I'm 27. My suggestion to you is to go and see a psychologist for the mental and emotional. They will help you with changing your ways of thinking and teach you skills to help you maintain and cope with negative feelings. (depression and anxiety) And a Psychiatrist for the body physical. It's possible that you have a chemial imbalance and taking daily medication will balance and help you out. It helps me. I am a totally different person when I'm on my medication. You have to except yourself and understand that you are a human and you are allowed to make mistakes and that you are not perfect. Surround yourself with people that care about you and that you care about and do things that make you happy. I believe just like the song. "If it make you happy it can't be that bad." Do things that make you happy. People want to be around people that are happy and confident.