[amily]

I know that I should forget him, I know I should move on and get on with my life. I am confident girl and I know that sooner or later I will meet someone who I may fall in love with again..........but each time I see him and talk to him, I just dont want to do it, I cant.....

Last night we had a student party and I knew he was going to be there. I could have missed and didn't go, but I wanted to see him at least once more, before he leaves for good from this town, he is finishing uni now and going back to South of England. I had a great night, was se-rounded but loads of nice and friendly friends, I have heard loads of good complements regarding myself and I know I have loads of admires, but as soon is Rob there, I dont really need any of it...........He has really good friends and all of his girlfriends are really friendly towards me and last night one of them, said that when they leave she want to stay in touch with me and that all think Im really nice girl. They wanted to me my friend and invited me to parties, but I didn't g there most of all because I knew he is there. Last night his mate come up to me and started a chat, I feel like he had a crash on me long time ago, but I can't even think of it, I would never go out with any of Rob's friends, because its unfair on him and Rob is there only one I will ever love form their company. His mate took me to their company, I wanted to speak with john for a bit, but end up talking to Rob, because he saw me and when I said hi, he was straight by my side talking to me..........I think john can feel that there is no chance there and Im glad about it. We had the most friendly chat with Rob, talked about our last news, he was asking me loads of questions, I was answering. Inside I was trying to kill every possible feeling of attraction to him, but I just couldn't, every-time I touched his nee by accident I wanted to run away. He is the most nice guy I have ever met and Im still in love with him........I know it. I dont know if he knows it now, because when Im around him, I usually have a big smile on my face and look very happy, but I dont want him to know it
and I know if he wanted it too, he would have been back in touch with me long time ago......very long time........

I feel bad talking to him, because I every-time I see him all my feelings come back, but I know it will be awkward not talking to him too, because he is a nice bloke and although he split up with me, at least I know he was honest about his feelings with me and that means he didn't want to heart me and I know now he wouldn't. I want to be upset with him, but I cant...........his smile wont let me do that. Its hard to forget someone who is such a nice person........really hard;( You probably think I am sad person if I still do it and I can't move on, but Its really hard to explain when it was your first love and you only learn how to deal with it. Sometimes I wish I could erase him out of my memory, but sadly his is in the history of my life and how I wanted it or not but he still be there. I am glad that I have a heart and I can love, I am proud about it and I am able to let someone in my heart......its great feeling. Its amazing! Its just so far he is still there and each guy that comes up to me, for some reason isn't good enough for me and I am scared to let him in. Its weird, but maybe I love the idea of being in love with my ex? I dont want to.........I know he isn't coming back, I know since he go that will be it, but I can't help it................:(

[mckenzie134]

There's nothing wrong with that!! He was a huge part of your life. Only time will heal your pain you wil never forget him... when the person is so nice and it doesn't work out it makes it o much harder to move on. How can you be mad with someone who is kind and only doesn't want ou cause he doeant love you like that. ive been in the same position my ex gf left she wak so great and froiendly no arguing butshe just didn't feel it after a few years.
This happens and i won't forget her and find it hard to meet others but you can neve comparecause you will never find anyone as good if you do that. Its so hard i know what your think you don't want anyone else and this is the truth. Its not going to be easy and will take a long time. I still don't don't how i will get through it butit does geteasier as time goes on. Its amazing how they just seem to keep gooing so easy but they brokeiyt off with you they have moved on before they did it mot as much emotion for them but they stikll have there times when they probably think of you. Who knows really who cares don't let anyone control you... good luck

[SAB123]

I feel your pain, Even if my ex comes back I can't take her back. But I feel I will never stop thinking about her. And that make me sad!

[amily]

I know that is how I feel... very happy when I talk to him and very sad then I have to say by and go, because I know that I can't be with him and be in his arms... have a laugh and just be his girl... I think I would have died if I saw him with someone else... I could not take it:( its good to know that after he goes I will never see it and I will just care on with my life... he has seen me with other guys, because I tried to start new relationships, I didn't want to heart him and I knew I didn't because he finished it with me. I would rather him to think that I have moved on, then no that I still in love with him...

[amily]

Well its summer, sunny days, holidays and warm days... and to be honest in my heart I don't care...

Maybe you won't believe me but I can't forget him or maybe someone doesn't want this to happened, everything reminds me about him... music, friends, how people talk... the smell of burning wood, nature... animals... everything and I can't help it. I have tried to forget told myself that Im only 20, I'm attractive and clever girl and everything is ahead of me yet and I will be able to fall in love with someone again and it will be even stronger then now... but I can't it keeps coming back and I can't imagine that I will never be with him and we will never plan our future together. Everything about him is perfect, although I know there is no word perfect and no one is perfect in our life, but for me in my heart this particular guy is perfect and I love everything about him. I know this type of words has been said by many people and Im not the only one who is in love...

Sometimes seems like nothing make sense anymore... not music, not people, not nature, not the wold... nothing, because he is not there to share it all with me and I will never be there for him when he need it the most... there will be some other person who will make him happier and take a greater care of him that I ever did... I just can't bear a thought of it...

Its not make any sense at all, but I only knew him one month in my life and I love him like I knew him all my life... its scares me... why do I have to be in pain and why can't I just move on with my life and be happy again...

Sometimes days could be brighter and happier and then everything coming back again and I just can't help it... I end up being in my room with box of chocolate and loads of soppy movies that makes me cry and realize how miserable my life without him in it...

I don't like days like that, but I can't stop them coming and I can't think of anything else...

I still hope that one day he will want me back and we will leave happily ever after... Grow up, you would say to me, but I can't help it... this is the only way I could get on with my life to know that one day he will be back and I can hear his voice and how he plays his guitar... or how he doesn't like dressing up and always something ridiculous... but I don't care, that is the way he is and I love every bit of him and just for who he is... I would never want to change him... ever

It makes me cry... but Im proud to be in love with him and although he will never love me back, I'm so happy that we have that month together, because that month was the happiest month of my life and if someone ask me the question would I say no if I knew then it going to end like that I would still want everything to happned because I would rather live and know that I can fell for someone and love them that much then live and never experience these feelings... Im happy to know that I can love... I have a heart:)

[amily]

I feel your pain, Even if my ex comes back I can't take her back. But I feel I will never stop thinking about her. And that make me sad!

You are in love... you can love... you can feel:) If someone want to erase that month of me and him together out of my memory... I will cry, because those were the best days of my life and I was happy... End if that it's the price I'm paying for being happy once... I would say: it worth it... :)