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    togetherwestand's Avatar
    togetherwestand Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    May 7, 2007, 02:32 PM
    14 and depressed and crying all the time
    All right, I have never done this before, but I feel like I am lost and my daughter is so sad and depressed this whole year and I don’t know what to do to make things better for her, or how to help her figure it out on her own. I will start by telling you that she is 14 and she is in her first year in high school 2 months into high school she had a bad knee injury in soccer and she had to have surgery and that involved cutting her chin bone in half and moving it over and by that she was home from school for 87 days, she missed out on a lot and she found out all the good friends she thought she had, she didn’t have, very few came around and our house was normally the party house, we had any where from 15 to 20kids here all the time. She has been back to school for about 7 weeks now and she can't seem to handle anything, she comes home from school crying all the time and she locks herself in her room, I feel so helpless she is always sad and she never used to be like this, I asked her the other day what is she afraid of the most and why is she so sad and she said to me" I am afraid of having no friends" this makes my heart hurt so bad because this is a child that all the way till now she has hung out with a very large group of kids ,and to top it all off her best friend that she has had for 10 years decided while she was out of school to date her ex boyfriend so that was just the icing on the cake, her best friend is now ignoring her in school. What do I do as a parent step back and let her figure it out, what do I do where do I turn I am so confused I feel helpless.I know this might seem very silly compared to other problems teens have but I am afraid at where she is going with her depression.
    J_sarah's Avatar
    J_sarah Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    May 7, 2007, 07:20 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by togetherwestand
    Alright, I have never done this before, but I feel like I am lost and my daughter is so sad and depressed this whole year and I don’t know what to do to make things better for her, or how to help her figure it out on her own. I will start by telling you that she is 14 and she is in her first year in high school 2 months into high school she had a bad knee injury in soccer and she had to have surgery and that involved cutting her chin bone in half and moving it over and by that she was home from school for 87 days, she missed out on a lot and she found out all the good friends she thought she had, she didn’t have, very few came around and our house was normally the party house, we had any where from 15 to 20kids here all the time. she has been back to school for about 7 weeks now and she can't seem to handle anything, she comes home from school crying all the time and she locks herself in her room, I feel so helpless she is always sad and she never used to be like this, I asked her the other day what is she afraid of the most and why is she so sad and she said to me" I am afraid of having no friends" this makes my heart hurt so bad because this is a child that all the way till now she has hung out with a very large group of kids ,and to top it all off her best friend that she has had for 10 years decided while she was out of school to date her ex boyfriend so that was just the icing on the cake, her best friend is now ignoring her in school. what do I do as a parent step back and let her figure it out, what do I do where do I turn I am so confused I feel helpless.I know this might seem very silly compared to other problems teens have but I am afraid at where she is going with her depression.
    I'm sorry to hear that ma'am, your daughter is going through a rough time right now, she is upset because she feels that one day she will have no friends. You should sit her down and tell her that some one is looking out for her, she still has friends, maybe she is crying a lot because, her best friend is ignoring her, and she is losing all her friends.
    I think you should talk to her teacher, or better, her principal.
    Your daughter will get through this, and one day, all her friends will come back.
    I hope my answer has helped you.
    Good luck, and tell your daughter that I wish her the best.
    anonymousteen09's Avatar
    anonymousteen09 Posts: 30, Reputation: -2
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    #3

    May 8, 2007, 07:39 AM
    First off, I am a teenager. I can't say I know what your daughter is going through, but I have a similar experience. All my friends turned on me and said that my father molested them because I made them all mad. This happened when I was in 8th grade and in the middle of my 10th grade year we had the trial court. I had to testify for my dad and he was found FALSELY guilty. I felt like my whole world was over. My bestfriends did that to me. I lost them and I felt so betrayed. My parents put me in a different school and I made new friends. So if I were you I would put your daughter in a different environment and let her meet new people, it worked for me and now I have new friends that I trust. Tell your daughter this quote "If a friendship is capable of ending, it never existed." A true friend wouldn't do that to her, therefore that girl was no true friend or even a friend at that. There are other people out there. I see that the last person who commented said that your daughters friends will come back to her, your daughter shouldn't take those friends back, she should show them how strong she is inside and that she can make newer and better friends. You just have to let her meet them. That's about all I can say. Best of luck ma'am.
    lOsT_iNsIdE_eMo_GiRl's Avatar
    lOsT_iNsIdE_eMo_GiRl Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    May 10, 2007, 01:47 AM
    Well I can tell you one thing... she's not the only one... :'(
    lovely24's Avatar
    lovely24 Posts: 12, Reputation: 0
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    #5

    Apr 26, 2008, 06:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by togetherwestand
    Alright, I have never done this before, but I feel like I am lost and my daughter is so sad and depressed this whole year and I don’t know what to do to make things better for her, or how to help her figure it out on her own. I will start by telling you that she is 14 and she is in her first year in high school 2 months into high school she had a bad knee injury in soccer and she had to have surgery and that involved cutting her chin bone in half and moving it over and by that she was home from school for 87 days, she missed out on a lot and she found out all the good friends she thought she had, she didn’t have, very few came around and our house was normally the party house, we had any where from 15 to 20kids here all the time. she has been back to school for about 7 weeks now and she can't seem to handle anything, she comes home from school crying all the time and she locks herself in her room, I feel so helpless she is always sad and she never used to be like this, I asked her the other day what is she afraid of the most and why is she so sad and she said to me" I am afraid of having no friends" this makes my heart hurt so bad because this is a child that all the way till now she has hung out with a very large group of kids ,and to top it all off her best friend that she has had for 10 years decided while she was out of school to date her ex boyfriend so that was just the icing on the cake, her best friend is now ignoring her in school. what do I do as a parent step back and let her figure it out, what do I do where do I turn I am so confused I feel helpless.I know this might seem very silly compared to other problems teens have but I am afraid at where she is going with her depression.
    Well.. first off soccer was her only way of getting her anger out and her fillings then when she hurt her knee she didn't know where to turn I'm 14 to and I know that teens need a sport or something to keep them happy and take there fillings out on why don't she get back in to soccer or you can take her shoppin every tueday or something do something to make her fill like she is specail and for the friends part all teens go threw that she will find more but b-4 she dose she needs to get out there and have fun let her get out more and meet new people don't let her get out of control but let her have fun and be a teen and tell her that you and her need to start talking about yalls proplems or if something's on one of you mind not to hold it in to let it out to each other and 4 now be her friend she needs you spend time with her take her out and talk to her about stuff let her know you are their for her but remember be a mom first...
    IheartEdward's Avatar
    IheartEdward Posts: 203, Reputation: 4
    Full Member
     
    #6

    Apr 28, 2008, 11:35 AM
    I'm really sorry to hear this and I think what anonymousteen09 said about moving school was a good idea but that's whether she wants to or not.

    Good Luck
    miss_carter's Avatar
    miss_carter Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Nov 15, 2010, 09:42 PM
    Hi I am a fourteen year old girl and I have been depressed as well.
    I know how my mother feels when she sees me all sad and messed up.
    So as a mother I know how you feel for your daughter.
    All you can do is be there for her and if she needs space give it to her do not ask to many questions if she is not willing to open up right away she will with time. Now about her friends help her find new ones and distract her mind from her problems I know that hepls me .
    I can't say it works 100 percent but it does help.
    And try to be her friend take her out have fun with her.
    And if she needs to cry let her cry that helps me .
    As for her ex boyfriend screw him she can do better : ) I know she's probably going through a hard time with him as well but it's a battle there really NO cure for a broken heart just keeping busy will help... all I can say is I wish you both the best I hope she gets better and time heals all it going to be hard for you to see her go through this but let her figure it put on her own :)

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