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    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #1

    May 7, 2007, 01:41 AM
    Top Ten Signs You Know You've Joined A Redneck HMO.
    10. Your Viagra prescription includes a Popsicle stick and some duct tape.

    9. The only 100% covered expense is embalming.

    8. Your Prozac comes in colors and has little "m"s on each pill.

    7. Preventive Care Coverage includes "an apple a day".

    6. Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.

    5. The Lone Star Bar and Grill is an approved pharmacy.

    4. The only proctologist lists his address as Rotorooter.

    3. The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

    2. Directions to the Dr.'s office include "Take a left when you enter the trailer park".

    1. The annual breast exam is conducted at Hooter's
    Matt3046's Avatar
    Matt3046 Posts: 831, Reputation: 128
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    #2

    May 7, 2007, 01:50 AM
    Your Dr. also sees the family dog.

    The nurse is named "bubba"

    Your Dr. tells you to eat less roadkill.

    You live in North Carolina.
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #3

    May 7, 2007, 02:06 AM
    You are correct! (As usual!)
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
    Uber Member
     
    #4

    May 7, 2007, 02:14 AM
    Hey, Matt!

    By the way, my Live Advice Rate (USD/min) is $100,000/min. So, I think that you might want to upscale yours a bit to go with the flow?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #5

    May 7, 2007, 04:10 AM
    Smiling in my coffee, what a great way to start the day, LOL
    NeedKarma's Avatar
    NeedKarma Posts: 10,635, Reputation: 1706
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    #6

    May 7, 2007, 04:30 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Clough
    1. The annual breast exam is conducted at Hooter's
    That reminds me of this:
    YouTube - Canadian Breast Exam

    [yes, it's safe for work.]
    Matt3046's Avatar
    Matt3046 Posts: 831, Reputation: 128
    Senior Member
     
    #7

    May 7, 2007, 08:01 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Clough
    Hey, Matt!

    By the way, my Live Advice Rate (USD/min) is $100,000/min. So, I think that you might want to upscale yours a bit to go with the flow?

    If only someone would call me. (and pay me)
    Matt3046's Avatar
    Matt3046 Posts: 831, Reputation: 128
    Senior Member
     
    #8

    May 7, 2007, 08:03 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by NeedKarma
    That reminds me of this:
    YouTube - Canadian Breast Exam

    [yes, it's safe for work.]

    Cam is brilliant. (silly Canadian)
    magprob's Avatar
    magprob Posts: 1,877, Reputation: 300
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    #9

    May 7, 2007, 05:46 PM
    During your rectal exam, you notice that both of the doctors hands are on your shoulders.
    Matt3046's Avatar
    Matt3046 Posts: 831, Reputation: 128
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    #10

    May 7, 2007, 05:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by magprob
    During your rectal exam, you notice that both of the doctors hands are on your shoulders.
    Or instead of coughing he tells you to squeal like a pig. (deliverance)
    Matt3046's Avatar
    Matt3046 Posts: 831, Reputation: 128
    Senior Member
     
    #11

    May 8, 2007, 06:51 PM
    You live in West Virginia

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