I wouldn't recommend piercing yourself, but if so and if it was only the ears - you would probably use a darning needle, as far as sterilization most people use a lighter to heat up the needle and burn off any germs and bacteria. You can't really numb a piercing site - Ice would work, but only momentarily. Usually you use a cork behind the site of the place you want to pierce to catch the needle. The only thing with doing it yourself. Is that you can't use a hollow needle unless you specially order it online - and when you don't use a hollow one the flesh isn't taken out, instead it's just pushed to the side, this can cause complications with keloids and such afterwards.
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