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eeclops · May 5, 2007, 02:45 PM

Hi,. I was with my girlfriend for a little over a year. We broke up December 06'. We have not seen each other for about 5 months. The relationship was unsettling as she was diagnosed as clinically depressed. When things were good,. it was good. But she had problems I just couldn't help her with, although I tried to, especially with her emotional and financial troubles. The stress took it's toll on me, and my personality. We decided to try to be friends,. take a break, from the strain but that lasted only a week, before she flipped out and said it wouldn't work because she feared she'd lose me if someone else came along. Then she said in an e-mail last December, she felt we shouldn't even try to be friends, because it was way too painful for both of us. I've made e-mail contact with her, twice since the breakup, within the past 5 months. I wished her a happy birthday in 2/07. I got a very brief thank you email reply from her the same day. The second time I sent a condolence gift and sympathy card when her mother passed away in March of this year. She sent a very nice thank you card, with a little note wishing me her best. I haven't tried to contact her since, nor she contact me.. . I am torn at what to do. I still have feelings for her. She never told me not to contact her. I do know through some hearsay,. that she was still a little upset with me... even after all these months. I still want to be friends with her. Maybe contacting her is the wrong thing to do. Any help greatly appreciated. Thank you all so much... regards eeclops

Bluerose · May 6, 2007, 12:50 AM

No. Let sleeping dogs lie. And stop texing and emailing it just drags things out. The red flags are flying don't ignore them simply because you are feeling a little lonely. I really don't believe that relationship will bring you anything but pain and sadness.

JoeCanada76 · May 6, 2007, 12:58 AM

Bluerose is correct,

Do not contact her anymore. No emails, no nothing. Let this one go.

Joe

radiant rose · May 6, 2007, 04:45 AM

Aww you sound an absolute darling, she should count her lucky star on meeting a nice guy like u pity it wasn't me that met u first. U deserve better.

AW805 · May 6, 2007, 11:03 AM

It's time to move on. Don't make anymore contact with her even if you want to be friends. She's made herself clear - she's doesn't want to be in any type of relationship with you.

You may want to seek some counseling though since it's been five months and you are still having problems getting over the relationship. If you have a pastor, please make an appointment for yourself. I think you'll find closure by speaking to someone about it.

talaniman · May 6, 2007, 02:15 PM

Leave her alone and go ahead with your life. You tried, it didn't work, nobodies fault, so move on.

s_cianci · May 6, 2007, 02:21 PM

I wouldn't contact her. It didn't work out and now it's over. Time to move on.

gypsy456 · May 6, 2007, 02:42 PM

Move on.

Sometimes you just have to let go.

By the sound of it you have had your share of problems in that relationship.

Life is too short.

saraispiel19 · May 6, 2007, 02:54 PM

They αre cαlled ex's for α reαson.

eeclops · May 6, 2007, 07:18 PM

You all have been very helpful, and most of all honest. I really needed to hear it from others, rather than create false hope. A couple of close friends that know the both of us have agreed with your opinions. It is hard to listen to outside advice when inside you feel differently. But you have all made so much sense of this, I'd be wrong to ignore. Thank you... Eeclops

jillygirl524 · May 6, 2007, 09:30 PM

If you want her back and think the two of you will be able to Handel or overcome her emotional problems then I say contact her, if you don't want her back then I would say let things go and move on

arnold strong · Jul 15, 2007, 03:24 PM

My ex was similar and I tried to keep contact when we split! But she met someone else and wouldn't leave me alone! She didn't want me but wanted me as her emotional support! It didn't wrk and she even emailed me last week and asked if I wanted to go to a concert - but didn't mention with her! But either way she chose someone else over me and its best to leave things because it just causes more pain! I know as I'm going through it myself!! Good luck wotever you decide!

NittanyBlue2002 · Jul 31, 2010, 08:55 PM

I could be totally clueless here, but I can't believe everyone was advising eeclops to walk away like that. Sure, they were going through some troubles... but she had some serious personal problems that she was trying to overcome. While the odds for success were probably unfavorable, I think the love was there and the relationship was worth revisiting. Just my humble opinion.