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lalala222 · May 4, 2007, 12:52 PM

We have a friend, who has lied to us consistantly since day 1.
It's only been recent that we as her group of friends have come together and noticed her obvious lies. We've also looked back on some of the absoloute shes told us.
For example:
Sleeping on a bench/door step in Camden with some friends we have evidence she made up. (considoring this was when she was 13)

Saying she was in a band and played guitar, however she only knew the chords, yet she was the lead guitarist. However, when we asked someone who does actually play guitar to teach us some chords and we asked her to show us several of the chords he'd taught us. She didn't know how. We also asked a band member if they knew her. They didnt.

She once told me and a friend one of her friends had been jumping on a trampoline, got so high he landed in the bath tub in a second story house via the window. Got up and did it again.

There are so many other lies i can't even begin to list more, she does it regularly. She has been confronted more than once, first time denying it and eventually backing down. She has lost several friends due to this problem and we're sick of it. It's like she thinks we're complete mugs and believe everything she says when really we would quite like to smack her in the face.

We looked up her condition..Compulsive Lying and need to know how to deal with it and preferably stop it. We know its for attention.

She also brings glasses into school on random days claiming she need them. We all know she doesn't. It's weird.

How can we make her stop whilst she's still young?

AltaVista · May 4, 2007, 01:09 PM

Other than the gentle-confrontations and trying to get an explanation from her, this is a deep seated problem that's going to need professional help. She's probably covering up some sort of insecurity or other serious issues. This is obviously Far beyond simply making up a few stories for the fun of it. And while it may have started that way in childhood, this has moved into the mental health realm.

kanicky73 · May 4, 2007, 01:28 PM

I completely agree AltaVista! This is obviously a mental health issue. I would be willing to bet that her home life is not the greatest, maybe even past or current abuse in one way or another. Maybe you should sit her down and ask her questions about home and what goes on there with mom and dad or whoever she lives with. If things are bad, I am sure she will tell you. You also face the problem that she may lie about that too. A therapist is the best answer here.

1badchoice · May 4, 2007, 05:50 PM

This is one of my biggest issues with people. Definite grounds for ending friendship. Maybe she has reasons, maybe she is ill, who knows. What I do know is that you can only take care of YOU. No one can change someone else. Is this a behavior your willing to accept? What about the consequences of losing your trust in people who have done nothing to deserve it... all due to learned behavior, on your part, that people lie. Personally... would not be able to be friends. It doesn't make you a better person to be a friend to someone like this, it just tears down some of the good in you.

pshyic helper · May 20, 2007, 03:26 PM

Originally Posted by lalala222

We have a friend, who has lied to us consistantly since day 1.
It's only been recent that we as her group of friends have come together and noticed her obvious lies. We've also looked back on some of the absoloute shes told us.
For example:
Sleeping on a bench/door step in Camden with some friends we have evidence she made up. (considoring this was when she was 13)

Saying she was in a band and played guitar, however she only knew the chords, yet she was the lead guitarist. However, when we asked someone who does actually play guitar to teach us some chords and we asked her to show us several of the chords he'd taught us. She didn't know how. We also asked a band member if they knew her. They didnt.

She once told me and a friend one of her friends had been jumping on a trampoline, got so high he landed in the bath tub in a second story house via the window. Got up and did it again.

There are so many other lies i can't even begin to list more, she does it regularly. She has been confronted more than once, first time denying it and eventually backing down. She has lost several friends due to this problem and we're sick of it. It's like she thinks we're complete mugs and believe everything she says when really we would quite like to smack her in the face.

We looked up her condition..Compulsive Lying and need to know how to deal with it and preferably stop it. We know its for attention.

She also brings glasses into school on random days claiming she need them. We all know she doesn't. It's weird.

How can we make her stop whilst she's still young?

This is most likely cause she has had a bad or unstable upbringing and wants to feel better in her self the best thing to do is honestly to keep telling her when you have found out it's a lie u know it is and she will stop the worst thing to do is to ignore it she needs to feel axcepted trust me