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    Fritzane's Avatar
    Fritzane Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 25, 2007, 09:35 AM
    She thinks I don't love her!
    If boys have struggled to love their babies then I am one of those.I put my effort,time and money but she still prefare to tell me 'I don't love you'.I only struggled to kiss her last week.I was very excited since I knew this is almost 50% of my adventure.Are you sure I can still win her love?Or I should not waste my precious time to look for another possible avenues?Please help me!
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #2

    Apr 25, 2007, 09:40 AM
    Leave.

    You are doing all the work and for what? To be treated poorly.

    If you like being a doormat, keep it up.

    Otherwise expect more for yourself and from yourself.

    She's not your baby... you are her butler.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Apr 25, 2007, 11:24 AM
    Her telling you that she doesn't love you is a good indication your wasting your time. Move on already.
    Rockabilly1955mama's Avatar
    Rockabilly1955mama Posts: 662, Reputation: 85
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    #4

    Apr 25, 2007, 11:24 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by kp2171
    leave.

    you are doing all the work and for what? to be treated poorly.

    if you like being a doormat, keep it up.

    otherwise expect more for yourself and from yourself.

    shes not your baby... you are her butler.

    Very good answer! Leave her before she has you on a leash.
    Fritzane's Avatar
    Fritzane Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 26, 2007, 09:07 AM
    My shyness and reserved character has really been one obstacle a major flaw to my success.I guess I need more courage this time.She invited me yesterday for dinner.You know what, we had a nice time with a delicious dinner.I still kissed her lips again.I think I am too weak to accept her flatteries.My christian background does not allow me to change partners at random.I am of a marraige-ready age and hope to be in marriage by now.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #6

    Apr 26, 2007, 10:05 AM
    My christian background does not allow me to change partners at random.
    Check me if I'm wrong, but dating is not a commitment to marry any one, and if its better to leave then why not?


    I am of a marriage-ready age and hope to be in marriage by now.
    Get out of this relationship, give yourself time to get over it, and then look for the right mate. There is no time limit on finding the right one. To be married though, I suggest you use great care and time to know the right one, before you get married. Marriage just for marriage sake is not conducive to being happy. Don't put that pressure on yourself, or let anyone else tell you when you should be married.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #7

    Apr 26, 2007, 11:42 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fritzane
    ...She invited me yesterday for dinner.You know what, we had a nice time with a delicious dinner.I still kissed her lips again.I think I am too weak to accept her flatteries.My christian background does not allow me to change partners at random.I am of a marraige-ready age and hope to be in marriage by now.
    So I'm confused. I'm Christian, so maybe you can enlighten me. You are with a person you call your "baby". She says she doesn't love you. You want to be married and feel like staying with a person who doesn't love you is your religious obligation?

    You've got to be kidding me.

    Your problem is much bigger than courage, my friend. You also have terrible desperation tied to religious misconceptions. I'm not saying that to be mean. I'm telling you this so you understand what is really wrong.

    Your desire to be married is understandable. Your recklessness at choosing to be with a person who is not in love with you is likely going to result in heartbreak.

    Please... don't use your faith as a scapegoat for settling for something that isn't right.

    Expect more for yourself and from yourself. Otherwise you are just kidding yourself.
    Fritzane's Avatar
    Fritzane Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Apr 26, 2007, 07:28 PM
    Folks,
    Thanks for your advice and comments.I've been reading all of them.Though I have that conviction that we shall get married I also don't believe in premarital sex.So her kisses are just enough to make me believe we shall maybe get married one day.My pastor told me to be patient and take time to understand her since she is at a very tender age and she still feels shy to express her to me likewise myself too.My dear brethrens in our congregation also cautioned me to be steadfast and put it in prayers if I really love her and want her hand in marriage,I told them yes.Since two days I have not seen her but she is sending me text messages just for greetings.I know she loves but she is still pretending to me tell me so and she knows I do since I spend my time and money for her to be happy.
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