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    missimoo1973's Avatar
    missimoo1973 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 19, 2007, 08:20 AM
    Terminating the father's rights
    I am currently 24 weeks pregnant and the father has walked out on us and wants nothing to do with this pregnancy and is not willing to help in any way. I am having a complicated pregnancy and am unable to work probably for the duration of this pregnancy. He seems to think that once the baby comes he will be able to be a part of her life no questions asked and I'm not willing to let that happen. What legal grounds do I have to have his parental rights taken from him and possibly put this baby up for adoption? I have two other children form my 1st marriage and I don't want them to suffer because I am financially unstable.
    collinsmom's Avatar
    collinsmom Posts: 45, Reputation: 3
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    #2

    Apr 20, 2007, 03:26 PM
    The birthfather has to agree to terminate his rights to the child. In otherwords, he would be served papers stating he has X amount of days to file whether he will parent this child. I would recommend that you talk to an adoption lawyer or adoption agency to seek their advice. In the case of my son's adoption, our agency served the birthfather the letter and he never responded in 30 days, so our adoption went through. I hope this helps a little. If you would like the name of our agency for counseling or advice, let me know. It's completely free to birthmothers. I hope things get better for you in your pregnancy. Take care.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Apr 20, 2007, 07:08 PM
    If the father wants to have things to do with the child after the child is born, sorry he will be part of the child's life, you can't stop him. So short of you moving to spain before the baby is born, he can sue for visitation, even joint custody and unless he has things wrong with him drugs, criminal past and the such, he can get visiitation, And even with issues, he can still get supervised visitation.

    So any idea of taking away his rights if he wants to keep them is just not possible.
    vlee's Avatar
    vlee Posts: 454, Reputation: 109
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    #4

    Apr 20, 2007, 10:24 PM
    No matter how much you despise him, you have no say in whether he chooses to be a parent to your child. It is completely up to him.
    don8's Avatar
    don8 Posts: 75, Reputation: 16
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    #5

    Apr 21, 2007, 12:28 PM
    Well you said tha he want to be a part of the babies life after it is born but you are considering adoption for the baby. So why not sit down and talk to him and see if he would be willing to take the baby when it is born and still let you see it so then both problems are solved. He will have his child and you can see it if you choose but to try to keep it away from him simply because he is not coming around right now, I mean my hubby lives here with me and I am two and a half months pregnant and there is really nothing that he can do for me right now so what do you think that your ex could do there if he was around? And he has expressed that he will be there when the child is born so maybe if you sat down and talked to him??
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Apr 21, 2007, 07:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by missimoo1973
    I am currently 24 weeks pregnant and the father has walked out on us and wants nothing to do with this pregnancy and is not willing to help in any way. I am having a complicated pregnancy and am unable to work probably for the duration of this pregnancy. He seems to think that once the baby comes he will be able to be a part of her life no questions asked and I'm not willing to let that happen. What legal grounds do I have to have his parental rights taken from him and possibly put this baby up for adoption? I have two other children form my 1st marriage and I don't want them to suffer because I am financially unstable.

    First I am sorrry if I came across perhaps a little mean on my first post, it was strictly legal. I know this is a hard time, you are pregnant and the person who was special to you turns out to be a dog and now they turn out to be also abusive by threatening you with this legal or that legal.

    And if you don't have help, check with your local social services. They have help with food and help medical check ups and a lot of other services if you need them.. And all the legal junk can wait till after the baby is born. And if you don't want the baby, the father can either take it, or both ofyou give up your rights to allow the baby to be adopted, there are many couples that are just waiting for a baby. I know how hard my wife and I had tried for a baby and had looked ourselves for a couple of years to adopt but was not able to, so there are a lot of great families out there.
    babydestinysmommy's Avatar
    babydestinysmommy Posts: 15, Reputation: 3
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    #7

    May 17, 2007, 05:28 PM
    To be honest I don't believe that you should want to terminate his rights. What us women fail to realize a majority of the time is that our realationship with a man should have no impact on a father - child realationship. I don't know the full story but to be honest if there is nothing wrong with him mentally and he has no history or drug use or abuse you should be happy if he wanted to assume the responsibility of fatherhood. There are women who do it on their own and would give anything to have a father in their children's lives. It sounds to me you're a little bitter due to the fact he left you... which is understandable. But, what you have to realize is that just because you don't like him or what he has done he is still the Father and you cannot change that.

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