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    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #21

    Aug 28, 2015, 03:01 PM
    If she asked you to rob a bank with her... would that make it all right?

    Seriously dude... there are lots of girls your own age... pick one of them. DO you know what people think of you when they see you fooling around with a girl that young? I'm going to be blunt.. but honest. The first thing in their mind is what's his problem? They think... #1 pedophile tendencies, or #2 serious personal and social issues that they can't find someone their own age group they have to find someone at a very impressionable age that has even less life experience to know when someone is playing them. In fact eventually she is going to think this too.

    I've lived in Europe for a LOT of time... I know how many are there to. There is no age group where men outnumber women. I also know its really not any more acceptable there than it is here.

    And at some point YOU will possibly have a 14 year old daughter....and I doubt YOU would be very happy about it either.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #22

    Aug 28, 2015, 05:41 PM
    I will merely way, this is a child, and at this age, it is wrong.

    When you are 30, no problem, now, nope
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #23

    Aug 28, 2015, 05:41 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by johanh12345 View Post
    I even told myself to just keep it at holding hands and kissing until she is 15 .
    This is where you really lost me. This indicates that you would not shy away from being intimate with her once she is legal. It also indicates to me where your mindset is. Its not love its lust.
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #24

    Aug 28, 2015, 06:38 PM
    Why do you keep trying to justify, the fact you think you are a man. A "Cradle Robber" would be a more accurate description. No one on here can stop you from being wrong so no need in trying to change our minds. You are lucky she is not my daughter. Grow up and do the right thing and move on.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #25

    Aug 28, 2015, 06:54 PM
    Of course she would ask you. She is 14 and a 17 year old is interested in her. You should have been the mature one and said no. This is one reason this relationship is wrong.
    duaaaa's Avatar
    duaaaa Posts: 20, Reputation: 3
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    #26

    Aug 29, 2015, 07:25 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by johanh12345 View Post
    I know I came here seekin answers but its 3 years apart and my best friend knows he can trust me I would never rape that girl I love her like seriously I live in the Faroe Islands its legal to date her when I'm under 18 and if we get together before I'm 18 its still legal


    You can be with this child love her , talk, hang out , share secrets But don't TOUCH her Don't HAVE SEX WITH her, even if its legal wait till she be 18 then you both should decide about that matter. Believe it this thing will make it serious and real.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #27

    Aug 29, 2015, 09:13 AM
    When are your birthdays?

    How long ago did you tell her how you feel? How long did she have blocked on Facebook? When did she unblock you?

    You say that you have been talking for six months, but you also stated that after you told her how you feel she blocked you on Facebook. So, how long have you actually been talking to each other?

    I think you need to talk to her parents.

    Frankly, I think you are infatuated with a young female who is beginning to mature. If you have known this family since you were six, I will almost bet you thought of her as a sister up until eight months to a year ago. Do you really "Love" her in a Romantic way or are you confusing attraction to a maturing adolescent who you care about with "Love"?
    johanh12345's Avatar
    johanh12345 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #28

    Aug 29, 2015, 07:36 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Cat1864 View Post
    When are your birthdays?

    How long ago did you tell her how you feel? How long did she have blocked on Facebook? When did she unblock you?

    You say that you have been talking for six months, but you also stated that after you told her how you feel she blocked you on Facebook. So, how long have you actually been talking to each other?

    I think you need to talk to her parents.

    Frankly, I think you are infatuated with a young female who is beginning to mature. If you have known this family since you were six, I will almost bet you thought of her as a sister up until eight months to a year ago. Do you really "Love" her in a Romantic way or are you confusing attraction to a maturing adolescent who you care about with "Love"?
    I do love her in a romantic way not just some hot peace of I want to take her out on dates go to the movies snuggle everything I wouldint dream of hurting his girl and when I told her how I felt at the beginning that's when she blocked me on Facebook which is 6 months ago. I got sad I felt lonely then 2 months ago she unblocked me and started talking again then she asked me to come out and I did and ever since then the feelings have grown back and now I'm just deeper in love than I ever was with her
    Oliver2011's Avatar
    Oliver2011 Posts: 2,606, Reputation: 746
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    #29

    Aug 29, 2015, 07:44 PM
    You must be very immature. We get that. Girls your age don't want you because you're immature. We get that.

    Bottom line is grow up.

    To be honest I'm not even believing this story anymore.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #30

    Aug 29, 2015, 07:54 PM
    She is a child and you are disrespecting her and her family. Talk to girls your own age.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #31

    Aug 29, 2015, 08:20 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by johanh12345 View Post
    I do love her in a romantic way not just some hot peace of I want to take her out on dates go to the movies snuggle everything I wouldint dream of hurting his girl and when I told her how I felt at the beginning that's when she blocked me on Facebook which is 6 months ago. I got sad I felt lonely then 2 months ago she unblocked me and started talking again then she asked me to come out and I did and ever since then the feelings have grown back and now I'm just deeper in love than I ever was with her

    WHy is my Bull Sh*t detector ringing off the wall.

    A 17 year old knows nothing of love or romance... sure they might THINK they do... but in a few years they will learn how wrong they were about almost everything they "KNEW" with such absolute certainty as a teenager living with mom and dad who really knows little about the real world except through a childs eyes, and not an adults that has to support themselves. But seriously, nobody else your age does either,

    I have to ask....you hang with the dork and the dweebs...and not the popular kids, right? Because there has to be a good reason you want an immature girl that knows nothing instead of someone your own age that at least has a clue....even if most of what they know is wrong.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #32

    Aug 29, 2015, 08:35 PM
    I believe it, and anyone who has grown up around the younger siblings of friends knows exactly what you are going through. I never tell younger people they aren't in love. You are but it's the mindless young love of youth with no other responsibility than to go with the feeling. It's as natural as breathing, but true love my friend IS about responsibility, and you are too old NOT to KNOW that.

    You were wrong to tell a 14 year old your feelings, and even wronger to go along with her acceptance of those feelings, and everything that's happened after. Sure you feel great now (Or so you think, but you still have that nagging feeling that something is wrong... you have doubt!), but you have complicated her life before she is ready, because even you have to know whatever she feels for you can never be what you think you feel for her. You did all of this without regard for her, just you, and that makes your young mindless love both selfish, and unhealthy. Of course you are so caught up in this love of yours, you failed to even think further than YOUR own selfish feelings, and it's affects on others around you.

    So what are you going to do now with this 14 year old you want to kiss and cuddle? Keep this a secret from her folks and yours? Use your friend to cover for you? Naw! The consequences of your actions have yet to come down on you... or her yet... but it will.

    Then you will understand the hard way why every adult here is telling you that you are wrong for what you are doing. Some do learn the lessons of good behavior the hard way, so best get ready, because the lying and deceiving her folk has already started. No good will come of that, and that's what makes your idea of LOVE a big fat LIE, since you fully intend to corrupt this KID for your own feel good!

    The worst of this is you are lying to YOURSELF. That never works out well. Hope you wake up before you screw up. At least think about what could go wrong while you are acting on your feelings so selfishly and thoughtlessly.
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #33

    Aug 29, 2015, 08:52 PM
    Unfortunately, I can't say what I would like to tell this self serving little boy. Some people come on here for honest answers and others are just "knuckle heads" who want to try to convince the world how smart they are, at 17. No point trying to change the mind of one who has made up his or her mind, that they are right. The bigger shame is there is no way for the parents of the girl to see the mind set of this boy.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
    Marriage Expert
     
    #34

    Aug 30, 2015, 03:25 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by johanh12345 View Post
    I do love her in a romantic way not just some hot peace of I want to take her out on dates go to the movies snuggle everything I wouldint dream of hurting his girl and when I told her how I felt at the beginning that's when she blocked me on Facebook which is 6 months ago. I got sad I felt lonely then 2 months ago she unblocked me and started talking again then she asked me to come out and I did and ever since then the feelings have grown back and now I'm just deeper in love than I ever was with her
    I notice that you ignored/missed the first question I asked.

    So, when are your birthdays? Why do I get the feeling she was 13 when you started having these feelings?
    johanh12345's Avatar
    johanh12345 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #35

    Aug 30, 2015, 07:30 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    I believe it, and anyone who has grown up around the younger siblings of friends knows exactly what you are going through. I never tell younger people they aren't in love. You are but it's the mindless young love of youth with no other responsibility than to go with the feeling. It's as natural as breathing, but true love my friend IS about responsibility, and you are too old NOT to KNOW that.

    You were wrong to tell a 14 year old your feelings, and even wronger to go along with her acceptance of those feelings, and everything that's happened after. Sure you feel great now (Or so you think, but you still have that nagging feeling that something is wrong... you have doubt!), but you have complicated her life before she is ready, because even you have to know whatever she feels for you can never be what you think you feel for her. You did all of this without regard for her, just you, and that makes your young mindless love both selfish, and unhealthy. Of course you are so caught up in this love of yours, you failed to even think further than YOUR own selfish feelings, and it's affects on others around you.

    So what are you going to do now with this 14 year old you want to kiss and cuddle? Keep this a secret from her folks and yours? Use your friend to cover for you? Naw! The consequences of your actions have yet to come down on you... or her yet... but it will.

    Then you will understand the hard way why every adult here is telling you that you are wrong for what you are doing. Some do learn the lessons of good behavior the hard way, so best get ready, because the lying and deceiving her folk has already started. No good will come of that, and that's what makes your idea of LOVE a big fat LIE, since you fully intend to corrupt this KID for your own feel good!

    The worst of this is you are lying to YOURSELF. That never works out well. Hope you wake up before you screw up. At least think about what could go wrong while you are acting on your feelings so selfishly and thoughtlessly.
    I don't quite understand what you mean. But I will think long and hard on this. Thank you for your answer

    Quote Originally Posted by Cat1864 View Post
    I notice that you ignored/missed the first question I asked.

    So, when are your birthdays? Why do I get the feeling she was 13 when you started having these feelings?
    Sorry. Yes I did miss that question she was 13 and I was 16 our birthdays are 1 month apart.

    Quote Originally Posted by smoothy View Post
    WHy is my Bull Sh*t detector ringing off the wall.

    A 17 year old knows nothing of love or romance... sure they might THINK they do... but in a few years they will learn how wrong they were about almost everything they "KNEW" with such absolute certainty as a teenager living with mom and dad who really knows little about the real world except through a childs eyes, and not an adults that has to support themselves. But seriously, nobody else your age does either,

    I have to ask....you hang with the dork and the dweebs...and not the popular kids, right? Because there has to be a good reason you want an immature girl that knows nothing instead of someone your own age that at least has a clue....even if most of what they know is wrong.
    You seem like you are a Bully to be hoonest there is no such thing as Dorks Dweebs and all that fat or skinny healthy or unhealty in faroe island we accept every person in the social life because one of the first things we learn in the schools are not to bully people but be nice to everyone. Maybe you should give that a long and hard thinking. Nothing is called the popular kids here absoloutly nothing.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #36

    Aug 30, 2015, 07:41 AM
    Ÿou are at the prime age to be learning about the difference between love and lust. While you may feel that you love her, love is something that develops over time, years actually, not months.

    A mature boy boy would not have stayed out with her overnight. Rather he would have told her that it was inappropriate if he truly cared for her and would have convinced her to stay home and get some sleep before school.

    At at the tender age of 13/14, she is incapable of knowing what true love is. She is enamored with the fact that an older boy likes her.

    I understand that her brother is okay with this, but what about her father? Have you sat down face-to-face with her father asking him if it's okay to date his daughter? If you don't feel comfortable doing that, you know the relationship isn't right.

    Her brother isn't her keeper, her parents are.
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #37

    Aug 30, 2015, 07:47 AM
    Time to pull the plug on this kid. It is going no where. He will find out one day if he ever does grow up that the information he received on here was right. Over and Out.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #38

    Aug 30, 2015, 08:17 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by johanh12345 View Post
    I don't quite understand what you mean. But I will think long and hard on this. Thank you for your answer



    Sorry. Yes I did miss that question she was 13 and I was 16 our birthdays are 1 month apart.



    You seem like you are a Bully to be hoonest there is no such thing as Dorks Dweebs and all that fat or skinny healthy or unhealty in faroe island we accept every person in the social life because one of the first things we learn in the schools are not to bully people but be nice to everyone. Maybe you should give that a long and hard thinking. Nothing is called the popular kids here absoloutly nothing.
    I've been direct and blunt with you.....not a bully, or should I really be talking to you like a child, instead of man to man? You really are clueless about the outside world. And you really don't know me at all. If you think I've been harsh... just wait until you have to pay your own way through life without mommy and daddy helping you. Or you get a real job... you boss is going to be a lot harder on you than I have been.

    I see a kid that is completely convinced he is right and really doesn't want to hear anything other than people agree with him. But nobody here agrees with you on this.

    Dorks and Dweebs have nothing to do with being fat or skinny, or even being ugly. It has everything to do with people that act in a weird and unusual manner...outside of whats normal and average. They are the social outcasts...the ones that have trouble forming normal relationships in the normal way with others outside of their little group. That may very well be an American dialect slang you really don't understand well outside of having seen it in movies. But they DO exist in Europe...they exist today...and they existed 28 years ago...because I've seen them there. And I've seen them there every year I have been there. which is every year for the last 30 except for 3 years I haven't been there. I used to live and work in Europe..I own an Apartment there and spent time there every year.

    People can grow emotionally and intellectually to leave that group. If they try. They don't HAVE to be there.

    And quite honestly..if you ignore all the good advice you have been given here...and insist on molesting a little girl ( which is exactly what you would be doing shortly)....I can only hope Karma gifts you with a baby girl in the future and some other 17 year old boy starts chasing after her at this same age. Because right now that's someone elses daughter and it is you doing it.

    ANd before you start to argue I don't understand what a 17 year old boy thinks, I am a guy...and I remember being 17 VIVIDLY. And I was an average 17 year old (meaning everything involving a female centers around having sex with her eventually, and as soon as you can)...so you can't convince me otherwise. YOU might have convinced yourself otherwise....but most of us answering are guys...and we know EXACTLY what you are thinking before you even know it yourself. Because we've been there.

    THe fact I am taking time out of my day and writing this to you is because I have enough respect for others including you that I think you might actually be listening so I am being honest and direct with you...and not talking down to you like you are a little kid who can't handle the truth yet.
    Oliver2011's Avatar
    Oliver2011 Posts: 2,606, Reputation: 746
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    #39

    Aug 30, 2015, 10:31 AM
    Agreed. Incredibly bored with this topic at this point.

    Quote Originally Posted by catonsville View Post
    Time to pull the plug on this kid. It is going no where. He will find out one day if he ever does grow up that the information he received on here was right. Over and Out.
    johanh12345's Avatar
    johanh12345 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #40

    Aug 30, 2015, 10:47 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by smoothy View Post
    I've been direct and blunt with you.....not a bully, or should I really be talking to you like a child, instead of man to man? You really are clueless about the outside world. And you really don't know me at all. If you think I've been harsh... just wait until you have to pay your own way through life without mommy and daddy helping you. Or you get a real job... you boss is going to be a lot harder on you than I have been.

    I see a kid that is completely convinced he is right and really doesn't want to hear anything other than people agree with him. But nobody here agrees with you on this.

    Dorks and Dweebs have nothing to do with being fat or skinny, or even being ugly. It has everything to do with people that act in a weird and unusual manner...outside of whats normal and average. They are the social outcasts...the ones that have trouble forming normal relationships in the normal way with others outside of their little group. That may very well be an American dialect slang you really don't understand well outside of having seen it in movies. But they DO exist in Europe...they exist today...and they existed 28 years ago...because I've seen them there. And I've seen them there every year I have been there. which is every year for the last 30 except for 3 years I haven't been there. I used to live and work in Europe..I own an Apartment there and spent time there every year.

    People can grow emotionally and intellectually to leave that group. If they try. They don't HAVE to be there.

    And quite honestly..if you ignore all the good advice you have been given here...and insist on molesting a little girl ( which is exactly what you would be doing shortly)....I can only hope Karma gifts you with a baby girl in the future and some other 17 year old boy starts chasing after her at this same age. Because right now that's someone elses daughter and it is you doing it.

    ANd before you start to argue I don't understand what a 17 year old boy thinks, I am a guy...and I remember being 17 VIVIDLY. And I was an average 17 year old (meaning everything involving a female centers around having sex with her eventually, and as soon as you can)...so you can't convince me otherwise. YOU might have convinced yourself otherwise....but most of us answering are guys...and we know EXACTLY what you are thinking before you even know it yourself. Because we've been there.

    THe fact I am taking time out of my day and writing this to you is because I have enough respect for others including you that I think you might actually be listening so I am being honest and direct with you...and not talking down to you like you are a little kid who can't handle the truth yet.
    No I got what you are saying I might have been a bit to ignorant because I didn't want to believe the stuff that was being written here because I wanted to think I was right of course. But I do get your point and thanks. I will start thinking about it.

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