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Jade Nicole · Sep 16, 2014, 07:58 PM

So I used to let's just say fool around with my roommate last year but we were also best friends. And then I started to have depression and anxiety issues and it made me freak out about her leaving me and I got to be a little much and then I saw something she wrote early in the year and we got into a fight but things were OK by the end of the year. Then I got a call from her in The summer saying she didn't want to be friends at the time but maybe sometime in the future we could. And since we've been back at school I'm friendly toward her but she goes between glaring at me to laughing at something I've said. And I mean I'm coming to the conclusion that I may have developed feelings for her last year and I still may have those and I've seen things she's posted and overheard her saying to someone regarding us that she has trouble sleeping now. And I'm confused as to why she's acting so aggressively and I'm here on the other hand being friendly and polite. I had a friend tell me they think she's acting this way because this is how she's coming to terms with those feelings. What are your thoughts?

odinn7 · Sep 16, 2014, 09:53 PM

I think you should try asking her what is going on. I know, it's a new and unusual idea but hey, give it a shot.

talaniman · Sep 17, 2014, 05:23 AM

My thoughts are you want to get closer to her and she doesn't want what you want. She may have mood swings toward you (that likely have little to do with YOU) and you are looking for signs that she is ready to let you closer.

I understand wanting someone that doesn't want you the same way, and how confusing that can be, but her confusion doesn't matter when she says she doesn't want a friendship with you now. That's not confusing at all, and you should take her word for it.

My final thoughts are that YOU shouldn't let her confusion confuse YOU, or give you any false hope of being close "friends" again any time soon, certainly not the way you were. I doubt that happens. I think you accept that and let her deal with her issues while you keep a healthy distance and move forward in your life and don't get caught up in her confusion.

Homegirl 50 · Sep 17, 2014, 06:59 AM

I don't know why you are confused. She has told you she does not want to be friends with you now. Back off from her, this is probably why she is acting moody towards you.
She does not want you as you want her. Move on.

smoothy · Sep 17, 2014, 07:21 AM

Avoid her... there are plenty of others out there.