[3044Artemis]

My 72 y.o. brother who is a severe alcoholic has become incontinent and seems unconcerned. He sleeps 2 hours, gets up and drinks 2 to 3 beers and goes back to bed. The only income he has is social security. What options are there for his care? I live out of the state he lives in.

[Wondergirl]

Would he admit anyone into his house?

You could start here Contact NCOA and get help (a social worker) for him--IF he would agree to that.

[Jake2008]

Does he have a family doctor? Does he have friends that you know of who live nearby? Are there other family members that might be willing to assist, in helping him?

How long has it been that his life seems to resolve around drinking and sleeping. Does he buy groceries? Who pays the bills, and does he have any savings, or medical coverage or would he qualify for assisted living?

There is so much missing here. If this has been his chosen lifestyle for the past few decades, and he is managing, although not likely very well, I'm not sure what can be done. If he was drinking away his rent money, and the utilities have been turned off, that's another matter.

Have you talked to him? Would he be willing to speak to his doctor, and perhaps get a referral for assistance? I don't know what he needs, and you haven't said that he is starving to death, or ill with disease, although he sounds like he's in a bad situation with just the alcohol and the effects of that with the incompetence. If it is the alcohol. Perhaps he is pain of some sort?

More information would be helpful, including what you would like to see done, and what his immediate needs are.

[3044Artemis]

Does he have a family doctor? He did go to a dr. for an eye infection but I don't know if it was an eye doctor or MD.

Does he have friends that you know of who live nearby? He alienated the girlfriend who was helping him with bills, food, driving him around.

Are there other family members that might be willing to assist, in helping him? He has alienated his children who will have nothing to do with him even though they are in the same town. Two friends came to his aid when he was reported to be walking up the street in his underwear, going to the store to buy gatorade.

How long has it been that his life seems to resolve around drinking and sleeping. He has been drinking since the age of 12 from what he told me. Anytime we are in that town he is usually drunk and injured so he won't help us with maintenance. If he isn't drunk when we get there, in 2 days he is. The drinking/sleeping is more than in the past

Fall of 2013 when we were at the town twice, he took off and would not talk to us. Both visits we cleaned up tree debris from a severe storm.

Does he buy groceries? I don't know. He used to eat all the food in the house when my late-brother was alive but away. He never replaced it. There is a freezer partially full of meat that would require cooking.

After my brother died, I told him to eat up the food in the house and freezer. There was pudding and the like. He said he didn't eat that stuff. I didn't open the freezer last visit.

Who pays the bills. The former GF inputted payments on the computer for him. He pays the electric, gas, sewer/sanitation and thinks that's sufficient. It is not. There is house insurance and property taxes as well as upkeep on the house.

Does he have any savings? I don't know. I saw a cc bill where he was paying $600 per month which is more than what he said he got in SS.

Medical coverage? He did not sign up for medicare.

Would he qualify for assisted living? I am going to look into that. He is letting the house fall into significant disrepair thinking he will be able to pay a reduced price for it.

Any agreement he has made, he has welched on. Monthly rent, insurance, taxes, yard maintenance.

He's the trustee and refuses to take the property out of my late Dad's trust. My late brother left me his third. That went through probate so it's been to court once. My attorney gave him options submitted by me on living arrangements including him living in the house rent free if he willed me his 3rd and paid the insurance, taxes, utilities. No response. Other options were buy me out or pay rent.

From what I have read here, when I prevail in court, I will give him 30 days written notice to vacate; and if he doesn't, evict him.

[3044Artemis]

Wondergirl: I own 2/3 of the house. The deed is in my Dad's trust name and he, as trustee, won't do the paperwork. While the attorney's are hashing out the ownership fact, I am looking to what happens afterward.

[3044Artemis]

The girlfriend my brother alienated has taken on sobering him up. He was sober but very emotionally vulnerable when I saw him on July 2, 2014.

[ma0641]

Why not Medicare? Did he not qualify? If not, why not Medicaid?

[Fr_Chuck]

What does he want... no one can force care on him, unless he is wants it.