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Curlyben · Mar 13, 2014, 02:47 PM

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

Yes, they to know. They don't care about the age, they don't approve of him because he is Muslim.

They don't approve because they KNOW that you are being GROOMED and are trying to guide YOU to do the right thing.
Do you understand what GROOMING actual is ?!

This situation can only end in HURT !!!

Wondergirl · Mar 13, 2014, 02:47 PM

How did you make sure he is who he says he is?

Homegirl 50 · Mar 13, 2014, 02:50 PM

I find your parents not caring their 12 years old daughter is talking to a 17 year old hard to believe. Earlier you say they disapproved because of his age and him being a Muslim.
So which is it.

tickle · Mar 13, 2014, 02:52 PM

This is going around in circles; on line relationships very rarely work out, and this is one of them. He is in Pakistan you say. If he plans to come visit you I hope he has a lot of money for visas, passport and travel and he has to swear he has accommodation and enough money to stay his allotted time (allotted time because he will have to go back to his home country)when he gets here with a letter from an adult confirming that. You can't do that, you are not an adult.

bizzlelover · Mar 13, 2014, 03:08 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Girl, you don't even know this guy in 2 months time, and there is very little a 17 year old young man has in common with a 12 year old girl. This is an older guy talking to you and your hormones are probably kicking in.
I would bet the bank that he will not come to Canada to meet you. Any 17 year old in his right mind would not be speaking this way to a 12 year old.

I've been talking to him for about a year already, and we have found a lot that we have in common. I wouldn't care if he was older or younger then me, love knows no age. He is planning on coming to Canada in about 2-3 months.

Wondergirl · Mar 13, 2014, 03:22 PM

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

love knows no age

Ah, a great line from a romance novel!

He is planning on coming to Canada in about 2-3 months.

And how will you be able to see him if your parents don't approve of him? Where will he stay? He will rent a car? How, at 17?

Homegirl 50 · Mar 13, 2014, 03:26 PM

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

I've been talking to him for about a year already, and we have found a lot that we have in common. I wouldn't care if he was older or younger then me, love knows no age. He is planning on coming to Canada in about 2-3 months.

I thought the online communication was only for a couple of months. Your parents didn't have a problem with you at 11 talking to a 16 year old?
You sound just like a 12 year old, did he feed you this love knows no age stuff?
Where is he going to stay when he comes to Canada. Are your parents going to allow you to meet him.

bizzlelover · Mar 13, 2014, 04:04 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

I find your parents not caring their 12 years old daughter is talking to a 17 year old hard to believe. Earlier you say they disapproved because of his age and him being a Muslim.
So which is it.

They don't really like the age difference, but their OK with it. They don't like him because he is Muslim mostly.

bizzlelover · Mar 13, 2014, 04:09 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

I thought the online communication was only for a couple of months. Your parents didn't have a problem with you at 11 talking to a 16 year old?
You sound just like a 12 year old, did he feed you this love knows no age stuff?
Where is he going to stay when he comes to Canada. Are your parents going to allow you to meet him.

I've been dating him for a couple months but I've been talking to him for longer. My parents were fine with us talking as friends. And no he said nothing about 'love knows no age'. He might be staying with me, if we can talk my parents into it.

Homegirl 50 · Mar 13, 2014, 04:24 PM

You're not dating him, you chatting online.
You said your parents are fine with you talking as friends, (although I find that unbelievable) so I take it you have lied to them and not told them you are now talking as girlfriend/boyfriend.
Do you honestly think your parents would allow this young man they have never met to stay in their house with their 12 year old daughter? Seriously?
Girl you are delusional and definitely 12.
If this is true, this young man has problems. There is no way a normal young man would be talking to you since you were 11 unless he is in to young girls. Which make him a pervert.

smoothy · Mar 13, 2014, 05:24 PM

Only a 17 year old perv will have any interest in a 12 year old. The differences in maturity is massive. And as was mentioned... anyone that does... is an aspiring pedophile.

And he's also got to have serious issues if he can't get a girl his age to go out with him.

I'm sorry... but he is preying on a very young, very impressionable young girl who is easily impressed and vulnerable to being manipulated by an older more experience guy.

THe only way to prove otherwise is wait until you are 18 before pursuing anything. I bet he's not interested then. Assuming he's not in jail before then.

I remember being 12... I remember being 17... amazingly vividly. So you can't say I don't understand... I do understand all too well.

If his fellow classmates found out about this....he would be getting beaten up in gym class on a regular basis.

tickle · Mar 13, 2014, 05:59 PM

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

He is planning on coming to Canada in about 2-3 months.

Sweetie, you don't get this part do you? He is coming to Canada IF he can get a Visa, put up so much money to support himself while here; get a letter from another adult, who knows him, to tell immigration that he has a place to stay while here. If he can't fulfill these requirements (even if his age doesn't stop him) he won't be visiting Canada.

ScottGem · Mar 13, 2014, 07:03 PM

You started this off by stating you were more mature for your age and don't like dating guys your age. Well you have proven that you are not very mature, in fact downright naïve. What I see is a little child who thinks boy her own age are immature, typical for a 12 yr old. So you find someone claiming to be older who pays attention to you and plays up to you. So you think you are in love with him. What you are doing is falling for a line. The greater likelihood is this guy is a pedophile, grooming you.

Just the fact that you think you are dating shows how naïve you are. You can't date someone you have never actually met. You claim you waited until you were sure he is what he says he is. But someone asked you how you know he is. You didn't answer. What has convinced you? Just because he has told you?

You don't understand that we are adults with knowledge and experience. We know that this isn't a real relationship. That this guy is playing you. That you are heading for trouble if you continue this.

The only smart thing you have done is post here asking for opinions. But I don't know what you thought we would say, but clearly you really didn't want to hear it. Another sign of your immaturity.

I really want to know what convinced you he was telling the truth?

talaniman · Mar 13, 2014, 07:20 PM

Its also possible this fellow talks to many females online because its easy and young girls love attention.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 13, 2014, 07:56 PM

I will have to agree with the others, Also a Muslim who is a true believer would never change their religion just to date someone. ** And they should not. To expect him to, to believe most of what he has told you, shows such immature actions, it is obvious you are an average 12 year old girl.

The odds he is 17 is doubtful, normally much older and says that, to get closer to younger girls.

I would say, he is normally interested in getting you to send photos at some point, maybe not yet, Your parents need to be told of this. ** A real mature person would not be ashamed or scared to do this. And allow them to help you decide what is proper

micgibson · Mar 14, 2014, 12:20 AM

I think that you should first of all pay attention to the category you put this question to. This is not even relationships, this is Children. Plus you are a child and 17 yo is a teenager, the difference is huge and to be honest I can't even imagine common interests o you guys.

talaniman · Mar 14, 2014, 04:14 AM

To be fair, this thread was moved from DATING to here. Because a 12 year old is a child, and dating is different than as a teen. She isn't even a teen yet, but its easy to think you are older and more advanced when an older guy gives you face time and attention. Especially from behind the security of fantasy and distance.

Fr.Chuck is right though about the dangers of being groomed to do things online that she knows her parents especially wouldn't like, even though a few pictures seems so innocent.

Alty · Mar 14, 2014, 03:02 PM

I always love it when a child comes here and the first thing they post is "I'm very mature for my age". A truly mature person doesn't have to tell anyone that they're mature, they prove it by their actions, and words. You didn't prove your claim.

Bottom line, the internet is a scary place. We get a lot of posts from Pakistan, from guys in their 20's asking when they can marry the 8 year old they are in love with. How long do they have to wait to have her? Is two years enough? They never even question that a relationship with a grown man and a child, is sick!

How do you feel about pedophiles? Are you okay with men grooming children so that they can molest them? What's you're take on that? After all, you're very mature for you age, so prove it. Let's discuss the cold hard facts here. You're a child, he's almost an adult (if he's really 17 and not older). Do you think it's okay for an adult to show romantic interest in a child? If so, why? If not, why? Show the maturity you claim to have.

bizzlelover · Mar 14, 2014, 03:06 PM

Originally Posted by smoothy

Only a 17 year old perv will have any interest in a 12 year old. The differences in maturity is massive. And as was mentioned... anyone that does... is an aspiring pedophile.

And he's also got to have serious issues if he can't get a girl his age to go out with him.

I'm sorry... but he is preying on a very young, very impressionable young girl who is easily impressed and vulnerable to being manipulated by an older more experience guy.

THe only way to prove otherwise is wait until you are 18 before pursuing anything. I bet he's not interested then. Assuming he's not in jail before then.

I remember being 12... I remember being 17... amazingly vividly. So you can't say I don't understand... I do understand all too well.

If his fellow classmates found out about this....he would be getting beaten up in gym class on a regular basis.

I'm not very easy to impress. He is not a perv, I have talked to Muslims who have said that it is normal for a guy in their religion to like younger girls, also I've been told that he wouldn't be to hard on me if I messed up because I am younger. We are waiting until I'm 18, he has already proposed and we plan on marrying when I am 18.

Btw he doesn't go to school, he has graduated high school and collage.

Curlyben · Mar 14, 2014, 03:14 PM

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

I have talked to Muslims who have said that it is normal for a guy in their religion to like younger girls,

That is quite true and even more, it's a cultural matter that men of Pakistani heritage find young white girls the easiest targets due to their underlying gullibility and immaturity.
YOU ARE BEING GROOMED !!!

He is NOT your boyfriend and he is ONLY interested in you in a sexual way.
Once you actually realise that FACT the better things will be.

This is CLASSIC grooming behaviour and MUST be reported to the authorities for legal action.