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    Bim1er's Avatar
    Bim1er Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 3, 2014, 08:50 AM
    Should I talk to a girl which my girlfriend does not like?
    In short, the girl was a good friend of my girlfriend. My girlfriend does not like it when I talk to her due to her "knowing" that the girl loves me. She has proof that the girl does. The girl was a really good friend of mine and I never saw anything awkward between the girl and I. Recently my girlfriend and I are now not able to see each other now due to family issues. So it's like a long distance relationship even though we live like really close. And the funny part is that my girlfriend never told to me stop talking to her just that she doesn't like it when I talk to the girl. But then again I never really had a problem with her talking to other guys. And in time I am absolutely sure my girlfriend and I will part ways due to the distance. The girl also texts me asking what's wrong and stuff. And now my girlfriend and I don't even talk much so it's like I don't even have a girlfriend anymore. So do I talk to the girl?
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #2

    Mar 3, 2014, 09:02 AM
    Sounds like she has a jelous streak in her that's not at all endearing.

    Also sounds like you are both really young. How old are you both?
    Bim1er's Avatar
    Bim1er Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Mar 4, 2014, 12:51 AM
    Does age really matter?
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #4

    Mar 4, 2014, 06:24 AM
    Yes age matters... because this is a very immature behaviour.. it matters if she is 15 and doesn't know better... or 55 and should.

    Much advice is age dependent....this very much is as well.
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
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    #5

    Mar 4, 2014, 07:01 AM
    First, break up with your girlfriend. Then think about why you want to talk with this girl. If she has a crush on you, leave her alone unless you feel the same way. Let her know you see her as a friend only.
    Bim1er's Avatar
    Bim1er Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Mar 8, 2014, 08:50 AM
    Okay for one thing the my friend has never told me she loves me and denies it even if I ask her if she does. She has made it clear we're friends. But I don't want to break up with my girlfriend. And for one the way I described my situation may make us look young but we're both in our 20s. And why I want to talk with this girl? Maybe it's cause I want to reconnect with an old friend?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Mar 8, 2014, 09:26 AM
    Why even make trouble just to get some attention in the absence of your girlfriend? That's what this is about and it's a common thing to look around for attention when things are rocky in your relationship.

    Don't be deceptive, be honest with your girl friend and handle the relationship issues and leave the going behind her back off your list of options. You know this talking to this friend will not bode well if she finds out since they are friends. I doubt she sees this as a harmless reconnection of good friends and you know that. If you don't, you are only fooling yourself.
    Bim1er's Avatar
    Bim1er Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Mar 8, 2014, 09:30 AM
    Thank you talaniman. Like that is the exact answer I've been searching for. I just needed to hear it from someone I don't even know. You precisely have cleared my head. Kudos to you!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    Mar 8, 2014, 09:58 AM
    You're welcome and keep it real. Life is hard enough without the drama.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
    		  
    #10

    Mar 9, 2014, 07:04 AM
    Think about it.

    Think about the freedom you have to associate with any person you like, without fear of prosecution.

    Why would you give up your freedom, which is what it is, to choose who you talk to, or associate with.

    Good grief.

    Talk to whoever you like, and don't think twice about doing that, but, think twice about someone elses' insecurity and control in wanting to take that away from you.
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