[confused2013]

Now to anyone who has helped me with my previous problem, thank you. My ex with the hygiene problem/being clingy was dumped! The problem kept coming back and after the third time it happened, I couldn't deal with it anymore...


I'm now however faced with another problem. Please judge everything based on this story only, and give me some advice please...

Basically to cut long story short, I met my ex in 2010, we were together for 3 and half years on and off. The relationship was a bit up and down, but mostly up but then bam! He cheated on me. He didn't do anything physically but online flirting with different women, that's still cheating right? He apologised and begged me so much that he was turning up unannounced at my house, ringing my mum, sis, friends, my workplace to speak to me. I eventually got him arrested because this went on for a month/more and he just wouldn't stop. His family told him to give me some space but he wouldn't listen which was why I made the decision to get the police involved. After this, I wouldn't talk to him and he attempted suicide on two different occasions. He was then forced to take up counselling and he's been doing that.

I started talking to him again during his counselling and I feel he's been completely different from what he use to be. I've always told him he needed therapy even when we were together as two of his younger brothers passed away when they were only young and he's not coped well since. He just bottles a lot of things up.

He wants us to work things out and I am considering it. The problem is, my family will NEVER accept us being together and his family are being silly about things as well especially because I got the police involved.

What do I do? I genuinely feel like he could be or shall I say becoming a changed person after this counselling and I would love to try again. I mean it might not work out again, but I feel like I need to try, to know for sure. Life is about taking chances. If we do try, what do we do about our families?

[Oliver2011]

There are good chances to take and there are bad chances to take.

Have you seen the movie Perks of Being a Wallflower. There is a line in the movie that goes "We accept the love we think we deserve."

If it were me, which it isn't I know, I don't believe in going backwards. Stalking type behaviors can lead to more serious issues down the line. You should shoot for the stars for the man you want to be with. This sounds like you are shooting more for the dumpster.

[odinn7]

Ok...for me, I wouldn't deal with him again. I've been there before in my past and it doesn't seem to work out as well as you think it should.

With that said....

Since YOU want to do it and feel that you need to, I assume anyone here telling you not to won't matter much so here is where I will go with this:
YOU want to get back with him and give him another chance. You are 24...what does it matter what your family says? You can't let them direct you for the rest of your life. Do what you need to do and move on. Just remember that in most cases, what family says is just an attempt by them to try and save you from what they think will be bad and painful. It doesn't always seem that way but most of the time, the intentions are good. So be prepared to hear it and just do what you are going to do.

[talaniman]

If you want to recycle old BS and drama, the complications with your family you deal with or don't. If you want to take a chance try something better and move forward, not back. Explain why are you even considering taking another chance with a failed partner? Oh that's right, he is cured from being an idiot, right?

I think it's a waste to get the losers out of your life, and then take them back.

Good luck then, or do you need a prayer, or both?

[confused2013]

Lol thanks everyone, I see where you are all coming from...

[smoothy]

Get rid of him... odds are he will eventually fall right back into old habits. People very rarely ever change for good... you wasted enough of your life.