[sadface]

Just to give you all a brief idea.. my husband is a handy man.. and on Sunday my good mate and her mum broke their front door lock...
They were stuck outside for hours, no one could help mainly because it was a Sunday, so in the end my husband went to help , called the crane operators to help etc and he helped them out basically. Monday was a holiday and on Tues he went to buy them a new lock and installed it into place and charged her for his work.

My husband told me that besides that they wrote him a list of things to do around the house and he couldn't help them as he had other worked booked. So he installed new lock, hung a mirror for them and left.

Anyway to get to the point of my story...
Later that afternoon I was on chat to my friend and this is how the conversation went

Asked how her day was,
And she replied, upsetting really,
I asked why
And she said its OK, I just have to speak directly to the person,
I asked who,
She said I don't want you to get involved so its best I deal with it direct to the person who did some work for us,
So I said , are you referring to my husband?
She replied saying I am but you have nothing to do with it so when I'm able to speak to him direct to him in person, it's better for me,
So I said why don't you just call him,
She said, Nothing to do with you so! When I'm free to explain I will, just under shock at certain behavior.

I was stunned by now..

So I said, what are you about??
She said.. No problem as I said its better for me to discuss it with him. Sorry but better like that xxx

And that was the end of my conversation with her, so after that I approached my husband as he doesn't have a clue what she is on about..

Should I dig in deeper..? What should I do? Ignore her? I mean I am already involved now seeing as she sort of told me she is shocked but won't go into detail with me..


Im stunned at her certain behavior... upset and angry!

Please note i have know this girl for 18 years.. longer then i have known my hubbie!

[Oliver2011]

If it were me based on the little information we have to go on I would just ignore her. Is she a drama queen normally? It sounds as if she could be. Being stuck outside is annoying, but upsetting? Don't worry about something until there's something to worry about.

[sadface]

Yes she generally is a drama queen and a moaner and quite negative... but I am still very upset with what she said after all its my husband is on about and he did her and her mum a favour.. my thinking may believe she may have thought he charged too much and didn't do the ' little extras' they asked for without prior notice.. if its not about this I have no idea what she means by under shock with certain behavior relating to my husband

[sadface]

Yes she generally is a drama queen and a moaner and quite negative... they were stuck outside on a SUNDAY he was the only who went to help and this conversation I had with her was on Tuesday after he went to install their new door lock..

I am still very upset with what she said after all its my husband is on about and he did her and her mum a favour.. my thinking may believe she may have thought he charged too much and didn't do the ' little extras' they asked for without prior notice.. if its not about this I have no idea what she means by under shock with certain behavior relating to my husband

[Jake2008]

Because this has to do with his business, his reputation is important.

She is implying that his behavior was somehow unprofessional with hints of inappropriate behavior. Especially when she said, "When I'm free to explain I will, just under shock at certain behavior".

She can't just drop a bomb like that without an explanation.

I would nip this in the bud, and fast.

Your husband needs to go over there, and find out what she meant by what she said, as her 'shock at certain behaviour' happened while he was there working. If she is a drama queen, and begins to spread rumours, then that is another reason to stop this before it gets out of hand.

An alternative would be for him to make a direct enquiry, by email, or letter. Have him make the enquiry about what she has said, in writing. At least that way, if you start to hear rumours from other people, she could be liable for slandering his name and business.

I would certainly not let this one go.

[talaniman]

She wants to do it her way without you, let her. I get your curiosity and concern are piquéd but she simply doesn't want you involved. You wait until she does.

[sadface]

I know my husbands work ethic, he is a hard worker and has many happy customers, he told me when he there and even before he left he didn't get a bad vibe. But he told me he went there with the intention to just install a door lock and there they were giving me extras to do... and he basically refused it because he is busy.

Shocked at certain behavior i should tell her did he get undressed and start running up and down your hall way!!

[smearcase]

He charged her too much (in her opinion) for the work he performed?
She was shocked that he didn't stay longer and do everyhting on her repair list? Both based on her close friendship with you?
My wife and I used to help a lady from our church who was disabled with many ailments and extreme obesity.
One day as we were leaving her home I gave her a little kiss on the cheek with my wife standing right beside her.
She went into shock also. She was very embarrassed and worried about what my wife would think of her and what might be going on.
As time went by and we continued to do work for her, we realized that she had a lot more problems than her physical limitations.
What I am saying is- your friend may have created something in her mind that doesn't exist.

[sadface]

I reckon so, she thinks he charged too much to just install a new lock but she doesn't know the calls he had to make to get one for her seeing as this happened on Sunday and bank holiday Monday.. all the driving around he did also for her... and his work!

Again I could be completely off guard and its something else but I don't think it could be she thinks he was inappropriate towards her because in that case in know her and she was tell me something like that .. immediately..

[Cat1864]

It stopped being a 'favor' when he charged her for his work. At that point it became a job and needs to be treated as such. Are you involved in the running of the business? If not, you need to step back. Allow your husband to handle it as he would any customer complaint.

This is coming from the wife of an exterminator who owns his own business and has friends and neighbors as clients. It isn't easy to step back, but it doesn't sound like you were there on Sunday or Tuesday to know what was said and done. It might not even be him. It could be the 'crane' operators or someone else who was involved.

If she has a complaint, she needs to talk to him. He may or may not share it with you. That's his choice.

Keeping professional and personal relationships separate is part of his job. Trust him to do it.

[sadface]

I keep asking him to call her but he won't :/

[Alty]

I keep asking him to call her but he won't :/

I agree with Cat. This is his business. He charged her for the work he did for her. At that point it was no longer a favor, it was a job. Do you work? If you had a problem at work would it be okay for your husband to barge in if you had an issue at work? Of course not.

I realize this is your friend, but any issues she has with the work she paid for your husband to do, needs to be addressed by the two of them, not you. It doesn't matter if she's a drama queen, it doesn't matter that she's your friend. You have to forget about all of that.

In this instance she's a client of your husbands. She paid him to do work for her, and any issues resulting because of the work he did, needs to be addressed by the two of them and only the two of them, no matter how nosey you are and how much you want to hear the gossip.

[sadface]

I agree don't get me wrong but what I am pissed off about is how she first tells me she doesn't want to get me involved... and then drops a bomb shell saying she is shocked at certain behavior... is that is what is really making me cross. I have since then not spoken to her or messaged...
And my husband is stubborn and won't pick up the phone to call her!! and here i am stuck in the middle... thanks to both of them!

[sadface]

Ok the story is out :-

Her mum and my friend were SHOCKED at the cost of his work.. because in her eyes my husband was there for just under 1 hour installing a new lock!!

She said we never asked him to come on Sunday, we just asked him for a number but little does she know that the number he had to give her for the crane op people would not go up the crane themselves as they r just drivers, my friend nor her mum would go up 5 stories high on a crane to get in their balcony but my husband did..

Of course, this was on a Sunday.. she also forgot all the calls and driving around he did he made to find a door lock for them on a bank holiday... but only saw him 'working' for less then 1 hr on tues and charged them.. shocking she said.. its shocking!!

[talaniman]

I imagine she is shocked that she had to spend so much. You don't have to be in the middle unless you put yourself there. Your husband and your friend are adults. Let them handle it there way.

[Cat1864]

And that is where he gets to sit down and explain the charges. Part of business. Hopefully, they can work it out and you can stay completely out of it from this point on.

You may end up finding out what price they put on friendship. If they allow this to affect the friendship are they worth having as friends?

[sadface]

No not over 50 euros!!
she still insisted to us that her neighbours where with them since 8am on sunday and didnt ask for money.. but how can you relate what her neighbours did to what my husband did...
He went up 5 stories in a crane firstly which is a big risk in itself!! and the rest.. but she does not get it.
She said we are friends for years and you rip us off this way for just added a few screws in a lock!

[Fr_Chuck]

The worst customers in the world is a friend. It got so bad, I always tell my friend, to call 2 of my competitors and get a price, (if close friends) I will do for 1/2.

I have lost friends over that, since it was not free.

[sadface]

I am very upset :(

[talaniman]

Too upset to be objective? Or stay out of this?