[spiraljane23]

My boyfriend is constantly comparing me to his mother. For example, when I cook something, he talks about how his mother cooks something similar and how wonderful it always turns out. This makes me feel like I have to prove myself to him that I am as good as his mother is. I know that this needs to be talked about, but I don't know how to bring it up without offending him or his mother. I know that he has a wonderful relationship with her and I think that it is great, but sometimes I feel that he forgets that he is an adult and needs to leave the whole "mama's boy" attitude with his mother. I am very anxious now about everything I do because I know that if I screw up he will bring up the subject of his mother, or worse yet, he will call his mother on advice on how I can fix my mistake, which makes me feel completely embarrassed and inadequate. I know that he doesn't mean to make me feel this way, he really thinks that he is helping, but it only makes it worse. Please advise me on how to bring this up with offending anyone. I don't want to feel bitter about his mother anymore, and he is moving in in 2 weeks I don't think I could handle this constant comparison.

[southerntinkerbell]

Mine too say well then be with your mother!

[Krs]

I think you need to express how you feel how you just did on AMHD. You spoke in a mature manner and he shouldn't get annoyed or upset with you, especially if express your issue to him exactly like this.

Communication is the key

Good Luck.

[missk]

I had to approach my boyfriend about this. I just simply told him how I felt exactly like you did on your post. I don't think he even realized what he was saying. It could be a good thing-comparing to mom, but I know how you feel. After a while he backed off. I think he started to think more before he spoke.

[rol]

First of all I would tell him something positive he does, and then perhaps mention the negative about comparing you to his mother, in a nice way.

Then ask him what he likes and dislikes about you.

This will get your communication going well instead of focusing on a 5%flaw. Focus, ponder, churn up the 5% and it will grow 10, 20, and 60%.

[talaniman]

Just tell him how you feel, or else he will never know.

[spiraljane23]

Thanks I will try these