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slgjrm · Nov 25, 2013, 09:11 AM

Hi, I have been dating a male named james for a year and a half and we have recently moved in with his grandma and dad.. around 5 months of dating this guy (we didn't live together yet) I noticed some problems in sexual intercourse, he did great in foreplay but when we put the condom on it always went soft... (I was his first so I expected this) then a few months later it started too worsen, he couldn't really keep a hard on at all and when he did it always fell short of intercourse. This however got a little better until we had sex one night and the condom broke and I almost got pregnant. Ever since then (5 months ago) he now says he doesn't like foreplay and when he gets hard he wants it in.. But if we foreplay for 5 minutes he starts too go soft and I'm instantly turned off. Its like he isn't interested in me anymore.. I've cried in front of him before on this and now he thinks its his fault when I think its mine... I don't know what to do he's 18 PRIME TIME ( in our realationship he states that he's nervous of the people around or he has something else on his mind but how do I get him to have a normal sexual relationship with me?? )

CravenMorhead · Nov 25, 2013, 11:57 AM

So you're having sex in his parents house? That's a turn on. You're his first too. He's just easing into his sexual life so a little understanding is required. He's also sounding like he's a bit of lazy lover too, but that could be inexperience.

Experiment with different kinds of condoms. I know there is only one or two varieties that work for me. Other are too tight or just wear funny. Maybe look at getting the condom on and continuing foreplay so that the pressure of getting the condom on and on quickly is relieved.

How is he health wise? How does he masturbate? The reason I ask that is if he's doing something odd he could be training himself for something that could hinder your sex lives. I think it is good that you stick to your foreplay guns, I think you need to investigate penetration and birthcontrol a little farther.

slgjrm · Dec 1, 2013, 08:29 AM

He wants birth control but I can't even make an appointment and I don't know how he masturbates I'm guessing to porn lol and he tries to do things when were in bed but even when we foreplay and the condoms on it still goes soft even when the condoms off and were just foreplaying it goes soft and he says its cause were in his parents house but he says a lot just to make things better

CravenMorhead · Dec 2, 2013, 08:58 AM

In his parents house? That's probably the answer? Nookie in the parents house can be a buzz kill, but if his mom walks in? I am sure you wouldn't want your father to walk into him banging you like a salvation army drum.

Maybe experiment with different locations if possible.

slgjrm · Dec 2, 2013, 07:12 PM

But u didn't see in my paragragh I've been dating him for a year and a half its been going on almost a year I've only been living w him for 2 months

CravenMorhead · Dec 4, 2013, 02:03 PM

It's been a crazy week. How old are you both?

Has he been checked out by a doctor? This could a sign of a different more serious ailment. How is his health generally? Drug/alcohol/pot use? How are his stress/exhaustion levels? What we're looking for is a reason why he's going soft.