Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    Kylie233's Avatar
    Kylie233 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 25, 2013, 05:13 AM
    Obsessive ex
    I have been with my boyfriend for 6 months now and everything with us could not be going more perfect, but, he has an obsessive ex girlfriend! They were together for a year before we got together, and him and his friends tell me she was extremely controlling of his life, along with the help of her mother. She has used everything to keep in contact with him.

    At first I didn't mind so much, thought it would pass but it has got worse. It started with her talking to me, now she is using her grandfathers death to talk to my boyfriend again asking for sympathy, to now having searched out my sister on social media asking for a friend to help with her break up and has minuplated her.

    I have got to the point where it's really starting to affect me and making me unhappy. My boyfriend and I are looking at getting a house next year and everything. I just want to be able to have a peaceful life without this constant drama! Any advice would be really appreciated!
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
    current pert
     
    #2

    Nov 25, 2013, 05:24 AM
    I do understand how easy it is to get embroiled in this, but somehow you have to stay away from her completely, and deal exclusively with your boyfriend. Try not to quiz or nag (not saying you have!), but let him know that you can tolerate only so much, and if he wants you to stay with him, he needs to go no contact with her, 100%. Playing on sympathy is ludicrous enough after two young people break up after only a year, no children, but he's being just as ludicrous if he falls for it. Your problem is with HIM.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #3

    Nov 25, 2013, 02:12 PM
    I agree with Joy.

    I would only add that when and if he does the zero contact with her, that could put her into hyperspace, and she could begin to do more.

    IF that happens, record everything. Where she shows up, any email, phone calls, messages, texts, etc. Keep your distance, but at that point, if it happens at all, then call the police.

    In the meanwhile, I agree that it is your boyfriend that needs to get rid of her behavior as far as contact goes. All he has to do is make up his mind not to deal with her, and then stick to it.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Nov 26, 2013, 07:15 AM
    It's your boyfriend and sister who need to shut her down.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

My obsessive ex/boyfriend. [ 5 Answers ]

Hello. I'm 17 yo and I've had had a problem with my "boyfriend" for about a year. I met him about 6 years ago, and two years ago we started going out. He's 5 years older than me, which , by me, is OK. The thing is, he is obsessive, he is a psycho, and he is really jealous.Two months after we got...

Could I be Obsessive compuslive? [ 2 Answers ]

I was watching a how on OCD and noticed one of the girls on it had a little in common with myself. I was just curious, are these examples of OCD? Say there is something I REALLY want to do, like travel, or I REALLY like the colour purple or the number 16 or am REALLY into a sport, as soon as I come...

Am I too obsessive? [ 107 Answers ]

Its been a month and a half of NO CONTACT. I finally stuck to it. But the only thing is that I'm hurting over my ex-girlfriend. It wasn't like she went around the world and back for me. I was the one going out of my way for her. But I'm still hurting. Can't stop thinking about her and the...

Obsessive Cleaning [ 2 Answers ]

I'm 13 and I have a problem. Over the past few weeks, I have been feeling the need to clean things. The feeling usually comes when I notice that something is dirty, but I also just want to wash myself sometimes. It has been getting worse, an I am not sure what to do about it. Possibly the worst...

Am I obsessive with my fianc? [ 35 Answers ]

Right, ths is kinda hard to explain so ill cut it down a bit lol... My fiances parents live in scotland, im in england, and he has a job in scotland so he's up there most of the time. When we're together in life, he is the most adorable person you could ever meet, but while hes up there he rings...


View more questions Search