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Kylie233 · Nov 25, 2013, 05:13 AM

I have been with my boyfriend for 6 months now and everything with us could not be going more perfect, but, he has an obsessive ex girlfriend! They were together for a year before we got together, and him and his friends tell me she was extremely controlling of his life, along with the help of her mother. She has used everything to keep in contact with him.

At first I didn't mind so much, thought it would pass but it has got worse. It started with her talking to me, now she is using her grandfathers death to talk to my boyfriend again asking for sympathy, to now having searched out my sister on social media asking for a friend to help with her break up and has minuplated her.

I have got to the point where it's really starting to affect me and making me unhappy. My boyfriend and I are looking at getting a house next year and everything. I just want to be able to have a peaceful life without this constant drama! Any advice would be really appreciated!

joypulv · Nov 25, 2013, 05:24 AM

I do understand how easy it is to get embroiled in this, but somehow you have to stay away from her completely, and deal exclusively with your boyfriend. Try not to quiz or nag (not saying you have!), but let him know that you can tolerate only so much, and if he wants you to stay with him, he needs to go no contact with her, 100%. Playing on sympathy is ludicrous enough after two young people break up after only a year, no children, but he's being just as ludicrous if he falls for it. Your problem is with HIM.

Jake2008 · Nov 25, 2013, 02:12 PM

I agree with Joy.

I would only add that when and if he does the zero contact with her, that could put her into hyperspace, and she could begin to do more.

IF that happens, record everything. Where she shows up, any email, phone calls, messages, texts, etc. Keep your distance, but at that point, if it happens at all, then call the police.

In the meanwhile, I agree that it is your boyfriend that needs to get rid of her behavior as far as contact goes. All he has to do is make up his mind not to deal with her, and then stick to it.

talaniman · Nov 26, 2013, 07:15 AM

It's your boyfriend and sister who need to shut her down.