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    HiddenSecrets's Avatar
    HiddenSecrets Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 6, 2013, 01:33 PM
    I hate my mum so much, is this normal?
    Okay so basically me and my mum were okay.
    When my grandad moved house, we had to help him pack his things because he can't keep going up the stairs.
    He had a box of all our family photos. My baby photos, school photos etc.
    And I find out she threw them out, so me and my sister have no photos now whatsoever!
    This may be weird but, photos mean a lot to me. So now I'm mad at my mum. I was just wondering if I'm going over the top by being annoyed at her?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #2

    Nov 6, 2013, 01:36 PM
    Those were the only photos in existence? Doesn't your mum (and other relatives) have any?
    HiddenSecrets's Avatar
    HiddenSecrets Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Nov 6, 2013, 01:37 PM
    When my mum and dad divorced, she threw away the photos she had :(
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #4

    Nov 6, 2013, 01:38 PM
    No other relatives have photos?
    HiddenSecrets's Avatar
    HiddenSecrets Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Nov 6, 2013, 01:40 PM
    They have recent ones of me from say about 2 years ago, but I have no baby photos now, or there's none that I know of, this is why I'm annoyed :l
    Oliver2011's Avatar
    Oliver2011 Posts: 2,606, Reputation: 746
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    #6

    Nov 6, 2013, 01:59 PM
    You know you can't really pick who your parents are going to be and parents do make mistakes sometimes. Sometimes we make mistakes too. Do you think "hate" might be a little strong for this situation?

    You know what I would do? If someone threw out my photos, I would take more photos. So start snapping pics!
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
    		  
    #7

    Nov 6, 2013, 02:39 PM
    I know exactly how you feel.

    My mother did exactly the same thing, and not only pictures. She threw away awards, ribbons, brownie badges- everything.

    I have never forgotten how it felt to learn all of my stuff had been tossed into the dump.

    But, I did learn to forgive. It was only in later years that I realized that she was under a lot of strain and stress. Recently divorced, and dirt poor. We were forced out of our home, with pretty much the clothes on our backs.

    But, we were together, and eventually life improved for all of us. I still miss all my things though, and the pictures thrown out included cousins, relatives, birthday parties- everything.

    So, while it is understandable that you are hurting over this loss, I urge you to forgive whatever caused it to happen in the first place. The reason may never be known fully- your mother is entitled to her reasons, and to keep them private.

    Accept that they are gone forever, and let the anger go. There is a lifetime of memories and pictures that are yet to be realized.
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