[ineedanswers21]

Hi. I'm 16 years old. Me and my boyfriend have been through quite a lot in the 2 years we have been together, recently it's been getting harder between us because his family make him do all this stuff for them he doesn't get home till midnight then is tired and goes to sleep.. I only ever see him 2 or 3 times a week if I'm lucky.. But only for around 30 minutes and during that time his family keeps calling him and asking him to do work for them.. I told him a while back 'imsorry I cannot do this any longer, I'm upset and this is not how I pictured our relationship'. So we broke up. Some how we have started talking again.. He's making an effort but I'm scared it's going to go back to how it was.. What do I do? :(

[kou]

Um, your should take at least one or two days out the week to hang out.make sure you guys have plans through out the day to keep you guys busy together but have fun at the same time.tell him to complete all his work with his family before coming to hang with you.. but overall, your need to communicate and be honest with one another.. or maybe he is not ready for a fully committed relationship.. but good luck

[talaniman]

You are teen agers living with your parents so maybe you should both understand that you cannot have things the way you want and have to live within the rules of your elders. You are much too needy and selfish if you cannot understand that, and maybe setting him free from your immaturity is the right thing to do. He sure cannot control his parents. Nor should he disobey them.

And for sure you shouldn't hold that against him.

[mmresd]

You either respect what his parents are asking of him and are cool with hanging out with him with interruptions and all, or end it and find someone who is going to fulfill your needs.

[ineedanswers21]

It's my last year at school and my boyfriend left the same school 1 year ago.. He's quite popular and me not so much we have been together for 2 years and all these girls keep coming up to me saying he's doing stuff behind my back that he shouldn't be doing, we have made agreements like no parties without each other and girls are saying that they see him at parties with other girls.. I have heard it for months now and I'm over it.. I confront him and he tells me the truth I believe him.. He's Muslim so he says 'wallah' 'swear on my mums life' and even without that I know he would not lie to me.. I don't know what to do because it's pushing us both over the edge and we can't stop what is happening.. Also keep in mind when me and my boyfriend started going out the girls who come up to me now and say stuff have tried to break us up time and time before.. I have no idea what to do.. I can't just ignore what is being said.. I think to much.

[mogrann]

Your options are:
1. Ignore them and tell them you are not interested and walk away.
2. Break up(yes that is an option)
3. Have an united front. Your boyfriend and you go to the people together telling them to stay out of your love life.
4. Do nothing and let it continue.

Remember the school year is almost over and you say it is your last year so only a few months left. The choice is all yours on what you choose to do. There is not one answer that is better than the other as it is your life and your decision. Sit down when you are not stressed out and think over what you want to do.

[Wondergirl]

mogrann gave you good advice. I'd like to add that it might be fun to "agree" with these little tattletale bully girls (who are probably telling your boyfriend's friends about your unhappiness over his supposed "infidelity"). Smile broadly and say, "I sure hope he was having fun" or giggle and say, "I sure hope she wasn't cuter and smarter than I am."

You want to break that tattlletale cycle where these little bullies get satisfaction from making someone (you) feel bad. If you show them that their "reports" don't make you unhappy, they will stop tattling.

And please stop quizzing your boyfriend on his behavior and making "rules" for each other, like "no parties." That's the fastest way to lose him. It's controlling behavior and makes you look needy and clingy. You're better than that, I'll bet. If your love for each other is strong enough to last during separations, it doesn't need to be manipulated.

[talaniman]

Threads merged

Between demanding he spend more time with you, and reacting to others, I wonder when you have fun.

[Oliver2011]

It isn't complicated at all. It's teenage drama but not enough drama to make a good reality show. Why get so serious at 16 when you should be having fun? I would rather be having fun.

[Itsmebytheway]

Hii.. Im 17 :) If you are in a relationship you must learn to appreciate and overcome any obstacles. I know its hard.. but you could discuss with him and meet his parents maybe and talk about it? If that's not all right then try to use the time that you both have as much as you can.. He makes an effort because he wants the relationship.. If you really love him.. try making an effort too :) this might seem childish and troublesome but stuff like this could help the relationship not die down despite not having time with each other..

Example: 1) when his parents call, help him with what his parents are asking for.. there, you hve time together now.
2) Write a bunch of sweet notes like.. "You look charming today" or "everytime you see the colour blue, think of me/ imagine my face" stuff like that is childish but kind of works.. you feel loved everyday.. write a bunch of them and put it in a jar.. get him to do the same. You give the jar of notes you wrote to him and the same goes for him. Place the jar somewhere you can see every morning and when you wake up everyday, Pick one and read smile :) It could be anything.. like what you love about him etc..
3) Send short sweet texts or quotes to each other at least once a day.

No matter how busy he is.. there are 3 days you should be together, his and your birthday, and valentines day :) Relationships usually don't go the way we pictured them to be.. your only 16 now.. If your relationship works there will be plenty of free time for both of you in the future. I hope it works out, good luck :D