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rajkumar89 · Sep 12, 2013, 08:35 PM

I am a young boy in a love relationship with a girl since few years. We both are loving a lot to each other and I can't imagine my life without her and she also felt like this...

From my family side there is no problem they like my girl and ready to accept to marry to me and my family does not have any caste feeling we are from BC category..

Actually the problem is my girl(ST category) side family is not accepting my love just because of different castes.once I talked with her father but he didn't convince and nothing works and he replayed we are from different caste how its possible its impossible to make marry nothing works forget my daughter..

How can I forget her sir its impossible and what is caste feeling sir is it created by god every caste peoples having same kind of human structure...

Plzz every one should think about two hearts not for caste feeling... please help me sir now what I should do and how to convince her parents

Wondergirl · Sep 12, 2013, 08:44 PM

Unfortunately, the caste system won't disappear until more women become educated and have jobs, more people mentally move into the 21st century, and the older generation dies off.

There probably isn't much you can do. If you are both over 18 and she is willing to leave her family, you could elope and hope her family someday accepts you, especially when children are born in your marriage.

rajkumar89 · Sep 12, 2013, 08:57 PM

I am 21 years old and she is from 19 years.. but we thought it once if we convince our parents they will feel happy

Wondergirl · Sep 12, 2013, 09:02 PM

Originally Posted by rajkumar89

i am 21 years old and she is from 19 years..but we thought it once if we convince our parents they will feel happy

Well, how then to convince her parents? It doesn't seem like her father is open to being convinced. And her mother will do whatever her father says.

rajkumar89 · Sep 12, 2013, 09:09 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Well, how then to convince her parents? It doesn't seem like her father is open to being convinced. And her mother will do whatever her father says.

Yes obviously whatever her father said her mother will do but the problem is how to convince her father with my words

Wondergirl · Sep 12, 2013, 09:16 PM

Originally Posted by rajkumar89

yes obviously whatever her father said her mother will do but the problem is how to convince her father with my words

You have tried and got nowhere. He is caught in tradition and in your country's culture. The caste system is actually a man-made thing for division of labor and power, but I'm guessing he believes it had a religious beginning, from ancient times.

I do not know of anything you can say to him to change his mind.

Would your having a good education and job, and a promising future, influence him at all?

rajkumar89 · Sep 12, 2013, 09:23 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

You have tried and got nowhere. He is caught in tradition and in your country's culture. The caste system is actually a man-made thing for division of labor and power, but I'm guessing he believes it had a religious beginning, from ancient times.

I do not know of anything you can say to him to change his mind.

Would your having a good education and job, and a promising future, influence him at all?

I completed my b.tech recently now searching for a job if I get good job even though if her father said no we are from different caste it will not work then what I should do..

Wondergirl · Sep 12, 2013, 09:26 PM

Originally Posted by rajkumar89

i completed my b.tech recently now searching for a job if i get good job even though if her father said no we are from different caste it will not work then what i should do..

If she is not willing to leave her family for you, then you and she will not marry.

My suggestion is to find a good job, save money, remain friends with her (if she is willing), and take it day by day. Maybe he will soften as he ages and will want grandchildren. How old is he now? Does he have other children?

rajkumar89 · Sep 13, 2013, 03:14 AM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

If she is not willing to leave her family for you, then you and she will not marry.

My suggestion is to find a good job, save money, remain friends with her (if she is willing), and take it day by day. Maybe he will soften as he ages and will want grandchildren. How old is he now? Does he have other children?

He is around 50 to 52years old and he had one elder son and elder daughter my girl friend was younger in her family