[Mayada12]

My fiancé changed his mind? His family asked him to leave me. I am Chaldean and my fiancé is Chaldean. My fiancé and I broke up four days ago after being together for four years, after his sister sent me a text that says leave him alone and you will have a miserable marriage with him because she says he’s been unhappy. He’s never told me once that he’s been unhappy. My fiancé and I have been dealing with cultural problems and have decided we wanted to get married.

What’s worse is that when I told him that his sister texted me a mean text he started defending them and saying things like, you should have never told them our wedding date. My wedding was supposed to be on Oct 12th 2013 three months from now. When was he going to tell them?

He is the sole provider of his family and they have been trying to introduce him to other girls. He always verbally tells me he loves me and I always tell him I love him back. I have done nothing to his family. They don't like me because of my family. From his sister text it seems like he has been telling his family something different then he had told me. I am so confused and frustrated.

He had told me in the past that he needs to stabilize his family before he can marry me. He said he feel like a boy in his house and feels he needs to move out to become a man. He has been saying for the past 4 years that he will move out and he says things but never follows through with them. Last year he told me his 40 year old mean sister needs to get married before he does. The year before this he made some other excuse. I finally said enough is enough and he forced me to break up with him. He told me that he will never break up with me and I had to do it.

Please help I don't know what to think. I really love him and I am conflicted? Should I wait for him to come back? I don't want to call him. Will he ever come back? What is going on in his mind?

[joypulv]

While I sympathize, you were very wrong to tell his family the wedding plans. That was for him to do. If you were thinking that he never would because of the way he has been postponing things for the last 4 years, then you needed to make the decision to wait or leave, not cause trouble. I think you should leave. I do feel sorry for both of you, and although I admire a man who cares about his family's wishes, he needs to make decisions and not try to have it both ways. It's not his fault that his sister isn't married.
I'm sorry you didn't just wait until October and get married, and leave then if it fell through. Too late now.

[Homegirl 50]

You may have dodged a bullet. If after four years he cannot make plans aside from his family, cannot stand up for you, things would not have gotten better. Knowing how his family feels about you, I don't know why you told them about the marriage but now you know your life with him may have been unhappy.
I would not wait for him. Move on.

[Fr_Chuck]

You are and will be second to his family, I doubt he was ever going to marry you, esp if he will not even tell family about it.

[talaniman]

Doesn't matter what on his mind because his actions speak volume so don't wait on him any more as 4 years is way to long already.

[smoothy]

Move on... you really don't want to be with someone that can't make their own mind up anyway.