[Homegirl 50]

I think he means what he said. He enjoys spending time with you and it works for him but he knows you want more and he doesn't.
You have only had 5 dates so just chill and enjoy the dating. You're in law school, do you really want to get into a relationship" thing?

[starrynightz45]

The problem is that I never brought up getting into a relationship or moving to the next step. I was going along with things, going with the flow.

I think in his view, since I am only open to progressing in a monogamous relationship, there is no point to continue to contact one another. I know I'm in law school, but I'm just not the type to get physical outside of a relationship. So our goals are just not compatible.

I think he means what he said. He enjoys spending time with you and it works for him but he knows you want more and he doesn't.
You have only had 5 dates so just chill and enjoy the dating. You're in law school, do you really want to get into a relationship" thing?

Also, I don't understand why he would start dating me in the first place. Because of both of our cultural backgrounds/the way we were raised, I'm almost sure he would have known that I wouldn't even consider a casual, FWB sort of arrangement. He must have known that I'd want a relationship at SOME point, though not after 5 dates. So, I guess it doesn't make sense to me why he'd even bother dating me.

[talaniman]

Why shouldn't he take a chance to see if he can get laid? He is a guy, and that has nothing to do with culture, breeding, education, or intentions.

What's to understand? Your youthful inexperience is showing.

[starrynightz45]

Why shouldn't he take a chance to see if he can get laid? He is a guy, and that has nothing to do with culture, breeding, education, or intentions.

What's to understand? Your youthful inexperience is showing.

What I'm saying is that there was no point for him to try and see if he could get laid, he would have known it wouldn't happen with me. Hence him NEVER trying. Your lack of cultural understanding is showing.

[Homegirl 50]

People do date just to date. You go out and have fun. After only 5 dates maybe he is saying you are nice but not his type.
As far as getting laid and the cultural component, people do things outside of their culture all the time. Culture has nothing to do with it.

[talaniman]

Oh please, woman of your culture NEVER give it up casually? And a guy of any culture will try. Look you keep asking questions, and the simple answer is usually the most accurate.

Maybe you over analyze... a little?

[JudyKayTee]

"What I'm saying is that there was no point for him to try and see if he could get laid, he would have known it wouldn't happen with me. Hence him NEVER trying. Your lack of cultural understanding is showing."\

I guess I missed the reference to what culture "we're" talking about -

"It wouldn't happen ..." I suggest you read through the posts. If I had a dime for every "it wouldn't happen, am I pregnant" thread...

Biting the hand of people trying to feed you is never smart in any situation.

[shalinisharma]

Regardless of what he means, he does not want a committed relationship with you. He just wants to hang out occasionally, maybe have a sexual relationship but keep his options open. He wants to date around. Before you invest anymore time and emotions on this guy, tell him you understand and then move on.

I agree

[sushmita585]

Do you know I sushmita is also facing the same problem. I know why people are so much casual and cavaliar and play with our emotions...

[JudyKayTee]

You know why? Let us know. I'd like to hear the reasons from someone else's standpoint.