[Hinafarooq]

Assalam you alaikum,
My husband had a difficult childhood,his father murdered a man and spent 10 years in jail,his mother worked in people's houses in his absence.Both his parents were very hard toward their children,as neither of them had experienced parental love themselves,they gave their children just bare necessities of life .They crushed the personalities of their kids,giving them the idea that they themselves were nothing,only their parents knew how to do everything,father didn't say his prayers ,mother followed the easy Islam saying prayers and reading Quran,while backbiting,swearing and fighting was the habit of their family.Now one child was Genius studying in common schools he acquired scholarships and became a successful software designer.All of the children were respectful towards their parents barely raising their voices and afraid to speak in their fathers presence.When they got married (elder sons) they listened to their parents ,and beated and cursed their wives and quarreled with their inlaws,all of this happened on smallest mistake in household matters.They married their educated son to a rich mans daughter,girls father was a business man,they just looked at their business.After marriage the girls parents were helpful and completely respectful towards their son inlaw and his parents,they girl spent money that was given to her by her parents,her husband gave every penny he earned,which was more than the elder brothers to his parents.Even then the boys parents weren't happy as he didn't cursed and beat his wife or quarreled with his inlaws.inspite of his obedience ,his love and respect for them they cursed him,cursed his wife ,beat him ,quarreled on minor household matters,and prayed that their son and his wife should come to harm.I want to ask you sir in the Name Of Allah help me,I am this mans wife ,and in spite of all our efforts my inlaws are never happy,they pray for our destruction,I am a mother of three children and my life is emotionally shattered due to their behavior,I am a practicing Muslim ,I was a student of Al Huda,I can never be cruel ,I obey my husband,and in spite of all our efforts his parents are always quarreling with us ,they want to take every penny of their son,they are rich but they spend nothing,I am scared when my husbands mother invokes Allah's curse on us,we are innocent what should we do?

[ZackeryBurch]

Assalam u alaikum,

I am a follower of Jesus Christ, but I wish to respect your religion. Just know that a lot of what I am going to tell you is going to come from my religion and my beliefs. One day I will read the Quran that I might better understand your religion. Until then, please accept any help I can offer. May your Allah be with you, but may also my God be with you.

As an outsider looking in, I would say you very much lucked out. Your husband sounds like a very good man and he sounds like he truly loves you. As far as your in laws go, the Quran says that they should treat you as they do their own daughters. If that IS how they treat their own daughters then I will counter with the fact that the Quran states that it is very much in the favor of a mother or father to have a daughter and that "If one has got a daughter or two sisters and he provides them with sustenance, I will be with them in Paradise." That's coming straight from your own Quran. Now, as for your own children you must do what the Quran tells you to do for them. The Quran says to "Obey Allah and the messenger", now your mother in law is outside of the obedience of Allah if they do not provide you with sustenance or do what is necessary to love you as their own daughter. Now you must obey Allah for your children and do everything to raise them as you are commanded. If that means not doing what your mother and father in law demand of you, that is okay you have that right since they are outside of the will of Allah.

Now, as a Christian I would urge you to fall on your knees in prayer and love your in laws as Christ Jesus would demand of you. To love and raise your children in the loving eyes of the lord. I would urge you to look to God and beg him to help your situation. But this is my religion, this is what my God tells me to tell you, that Jesus Christ will save you by his grace.

I hope I helped you with your question. It is my privilege to offer guidance to those who seek it and to love all who wish to see shelter in the Lord. I will pray for you on my end and ask the Lord to help guide you, but in the end, it is you who must accept his forgiveness and grace.

[joypulv]

I would gently talk to your husband about moving far away from his parents.
And keep his money for his new family, you and the children. His parents don't need it.
I am not a Muslim but don't think any laws of Islam require that you put up with cruelty such as this, and he wouldn't be disobedient - just too far away to abuse.
You could all visit once a year, no more than a week.

[afaroo]

I agree with Joypulv, Wish you all the best.