[pfieffer]

As previous owners of a much loved chow/retriever mix who was incredibly affectionate we were excited to find a similar puppy mix a year or so after our first dog's passing. We've had our new girl abouut a week and find that she is almost entirely disinterested in us and only seems to withstand our affection when necessary or if there is some sort of food or play reward involved. This is heartbreaking. Anyone had similar experiences with a happy outcome? We need some hope or advice in the worst way.

[labman]

It could be she lacked contact with people or at least very many different people. There should be a good chance she will warm up to you as long as she is less than 12 weeks old. A lack of contact with people between 6-12 weeks can lead to problems. Even if she is a little older, try some of these techniques to aid bonding.

''Elevation for small puppies: Sit on the floor and gently put your hands around your pup's middle, below his front legs, and lift him up. He is facing you. Hold him for 15 seconds. Repeat until he no longer struggles. If he is past 10-12 weeks, lift his front feet off the ground, but don't pick him up.

Cradling for small puppies: Hold your puppy gently on his back, as you would cradle a small baby. If he struggles, hold him firmly until he quiets for 10-15 seconds. With larger pups, you can do this as your sit on the floor, with your pup between your legs.

Quiet lying down: Place your pup on the floor on his side, with all 4 legs pointing away from you. Use your hands on his neck/shoulder area and middle, to hold him in this position. When he is quiet, praise him. Lengthen the time that you keep him quietly in this position. When he accepts this position well, handle his paws and muzzle, while keeping him quiet.''

The quotes mean this isn't my original work. It is copied from my Puppy Raising Manual. I have long used these or minor variations of them, and they are very effective. You may want to give him a belly rub while he is on his back too. Helps bonding. There is a big difference between him rolling over and demanding a belly rub, and you choosing a time to roll him over and rub his belly. The latter cements your place as pack leader.