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Versace26 · Mar 12, 2007, 10:22 PM

Hello Dear Readers,

Well, what I thought was the greatest love story ever told... was not. I have had this driving intuition to contact my ex-boyfriend just to see how he is doing and show him I still care. I have had no contact with him in 4 years. I am the one who broke off the relationship (we only dated a brief period of 6 months) and he was heart broken with desire to continue it. In respect, I had no contact with him but I still prayed that he would be great and move on.

Will my attempt to contact him all this time later put pressure and cause him more inconvenience since I am the one who broke off with him? Or can it create some peace in his heart?

vlee · Mar 12, 2007, 10:26 PM

Originally Posted by Versace26

Hello Dear Readers,

Well, what I thought was the greatest love story ever told...was not. I have had this driving intuition to contact my ex-boyfriend just to see how he is doing and show him I still care. I have had no contact with him in 4 years. I am the one who broke off the relationship (we only dated a brief period of 6 months) and he was heart broken with desire to continue it. In respect, I had no contact with him but I still prayed that he would be great and move on.

Will my attempt to contact him all this time later put pressure and cause him more inconvenience since I am the one who broke off with him? Or can it create some peace in his heart?

I think what you are looking for is peace in your own heart. Feeling guilty maybe? Or, did you recently suffer the other end of a break up? No matter. This is one that is best let go, unless you have an interest in rekindling the romance.

grammadidi · Mar 12, 2007, 10:34 PM

I don't think it would create peace in his heart, but it could cause him great confusion and perhaps pain. It sounds like you need to examine your true motives here. You are exes for a reason and I think you should just leave well enough alone.

Didi

chuff · Mar 12, 2007, 11:51 PM

Originally Posted by Versace26

Hello Dear Readers,

Well, what I thought was the greatest love story ever told...was not. I have had this driving intuition to contact my ex-boyfriend just to see how he is doing and show him I still care. I have had no contact with him in 4 years. I am the one who broke off the relationship

You seem to be surprised that this was not the greatest love story ever told initially yet you are the one that ended it. So why would you now want to go back? Did something happen recently that made you realize how much of a sure thing you had back then?

Originally Posted by Versace26

(we only dated a brief period of 6 months) and he was heart broken with desire to continue it.

With all due respect there are people who have been married for 70 years. I'd say there love is real, lasting, solid and a better love story then a 6 month fling. Six months is not long enough to base genuine true feelings on someone. Your still learning about one another and your still in the early stages of the "honeymoon period." The excitement of the new relationship blinds you to what's really going on and who somebody really is.

Originally Posted by Versace26

In respect, I had no contact with him but I still prayed that he would be great and move on.

Will my attempt to contact him all this time later put pressure and cause him more inconvenience since I am the one who broke off with him? Or can it create some peace in his heart?

My guess would be that he found peace along time ago. You broke his heart once, there's no need to do it again.

JoeCanada76 · Mar 12, 2007, 11:54 PM

I think it is the worst idea you contact your ex. You only went out for 6 months. Come on and get over it already. Your lonely and obvously did not move on but that is your own problem. Do not bring somebody else in the mix. I am sure he is happy and moved on and married and kids already. To call your ex now after all these years would be a real stupid move. Not a good idea. vlee is right.

Joe

Jiser · Mar 13, 2007, 03:05 AM

Perhaps four years is long enough to heal, perhaps it is not. Do what you feel is right. Maybe you could strike up a good friendship, who knows. You have only one life, so take a few risks, could be bad, could be good. It might be that he is married with kids etc. Please look at the potential consequences.

And don't forget: Curiosity killed the cat!

JoeCanada76 · Mar 13, 2007, 03:07 AM

Jiser,

I was almost going to disagree with your post until I read the last sentence, which says it all.

Curiosity killed the cat!

Joe

Jiser · Mar 13, 2007, 03:56 AM

:)

rol · Mar 13, 2007, 04:14 AM

Why did you break off the relationship to begin with if you thought it was going to be the greatest love story ever told??

I think you are watching too many movies.

Jiser · Mar 13, 2007, 04:26 AM

I want to be the knight in white shining armor, take my ex off on a horse and ride into the sunset!

rol · Mar 13, 2007, 04:30 AM

Ha ha ha

Gosh all thses crappy movies! How different "real life" works!!
Someone should make a real one with all the stories listed here lol;-)

Jiser · Mar 13, 2007, 06:24 AM

Coming soon to a cinema near you, a love story to span generations, starring Leonardo Di Caprio as Jack and Vivien Leigh as scarlet, directed by Victor Fleming.

'I need Space'

"Frankly My Dear I don't give a dam"

Deary me! The stories wouldn't make good screen play!

talaniman · Mar 13, 2007, 07:46 AM

If your curious, and I think you are why candy coat it like some movie? Bring peace to his heart? What makes you think that's what he needs? Honestly please leave the daydreaming in your own mind and spare the guy the bad movie routine.

Versace26 · Mar 13, 2007, 08:56 AM

Hello all who responded to my question...

Yeah, I realize now that it would not be the wisest of choices to contact him. I guess I was feeding on guilt. For the record, I have not ended a relationship and I don't feel lonely... this feeling came completely out of nowhere. Insane I know!

No, I have not been watching too many love movies, in fact, I hate those! I do am passionate and believe in REAL magic and not the fake kind...

No one can ever truly understand a connection that two people shared but I value all your opinions!

Kate Winslet to Dicaprio: "I will let you go now deary...."

rol · Mar 13, 2007, 08:57 AM

<<No one can ever truly understand a connection that two people shared but I value all your opinions!
>>

so why did you break up in the beginning?

Jiser · Mar 13, 2007, 09:21 AM

Katy knew she had to let Jack go. She went on to a great life, but she never forgot the love of her life. Symbolized at the end as she threw the expensive jewelry into the Atlantic ocean, therefore moving on finally as she died.

Everyone has a unique connection in every interaction, no one is the same. But there are better ones to be had than others, same for relationships. Don't let curiosity get the better of you. Four years is a long time. What are you looking for in contacting him?

Versace26 · Mar 13, 2007, 09:27 AM

Originally Posted by rol

<<No one can ever truly understand a connection that two people shared but I value all your opinions!!
>>

so why did you break up in the beginning?

It's a little more complicated than that... I felt it was the right thing for both of us at THAT time. We were in different stages in life and all. I broke up with him but shortly regretted it and poured my heart out that I wanted to get back with him... well, he told me NO. I respected his decision and began the healing process... then he contacts me a month later wanting to get back together. That is when I was too drained from it all and just said no back.

4 years later and after no contact, my call would not mean any bad intention just a sign that someone still has care for an old lover... I am sure he may or may not care to know that but I wish him nothing but the best...

Above it all, I still feel love conquers all...

chuff · Mar 13, 2007, 09:29 AM

Originally Posted by Versace26

No one can ever truly understand a connection that two people shared but I value all your opinions!!

How many times will people say that until it becomes common knowledge that, YES We all can understand the connection that two people share! Your 6 month fling was nothing out of the ordinary and many of us have all been in love with people for years that we thought was going to last a lifetime. Your connection is very relatable because many of us have felt it.

Jiser · Mar 13, 2007, 09:30 AM

Its all a big risk. He may be happy to here from you, he may not! Do you know that he has the same contact details anyway? Four years is a long time. I have moved on in the past from people and although I was connected then and I might be now, still it would be nice to here from them, see how their life is going perhaps even strike up a friendship. But they are mainly part of my past for a reason, same probably applies to you. So be wary, very wary.

You only got one life?

LBP · Mar 13, 2007, 09:36 AM

I think contacting him would be an okay idea... But don't do it in the hopes of getting him back... Just keep an open mind. Let what happens, happen.