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coachrollo · Oct 9, 2012, 08:57 AM

My wife 3 weeks ago didn't call when she left work which she does everyday. Well 3 hrs later she finally called and said that she was having drinks with him. I asked her why she didn't call and she said she didn't think about it. Well last week I walked in the bedroom at 10pm and she was on the phone with him, She said it was for him to tell her that another employee was not going to be at work the next day. The thing is he is a sales manager in another state. The lady out was not evevn in my wife's department. When I asked about it she blew up and said I was insecure. The following Friday I seen where he text her to call him when she left work and she did. Since then she has locked her phone. She doesn't know I know the code I checked it and they continue to talk after work. There again they have no dealings in day to day business. Am I be paranoid and insecure. If it was me doing it she would be livid.

JudyKayTee · Oct 9, 2012, 09:09 AM

Originally Posted by coachrollo

My wife 3 weeks ago didnt call when she left work which she does everyday. Well 3 hrs later she finally called and said that she was having drinks with him. I asked her why she didnt call and she said she didnt think about it. Well last week I walked in the bedroom at 10pm and she was on the phone with him, She said it was for him to tell her that another employee was not going to be at work the next day. The thing is he is a sales manager in another state. The lady out was not evevn in my wifes department. When I asked about it she blew up and said i was insecure. The following friday I seen where he text her to call him when she left work and she did. Since then she has locked her phone. She dosent know I know the code I checked it and they continue to talk after work. There again they have no dealings in day to day business. Am i be paranoid and insecure. If it was me doing it she would be livid.

How about asking her what's going on without being confrontational or argumentative?

If she blew up for no reason when you were calm, yes, I'd expect there's something behind her behavior.

coachrollo · Oct 9, 2012, 10:11 AM

I did I asked her very calmly It just seems real starnge because we allways used to talk when she was coming home.She also lied about his age she said he was in his mid 60s when actually I found out he is 52 she is 44

JudyKayTee · Oct 9, 2012, 10:46 AM

Originally Posted by coachrollo

I did I asked her very calmly It just seems real starnge because we allways used to talk when she was coming home.She also lied about his age she said he was in his mid 60s when actually I found out he is 52 she is 44

I think you have to talk to her about it - every sign that she is covering up for something is coming across loud and clear.

coachrollo · Nov 8, 2012, 09:43 AM

Well I finally found out more she has been seeing him and sending pictures to him but she says it just them talking . Funny thing is I seen a txt where she asked him if he had time to see her at night. Again her answer was she had to talk to him about work stuff. Funny thing was she didn't get home till 1100 Thursday night and she didn't answer her phone her excuse was she had it on vibrate and she was in walmart.

VIKAS_VERMA28 · Nov 8, 2012, 09:59 AM

Give her as much love as possible. Period.

soundscrazy · Nov 14, 2012, 07:48 AM

Originally Posted by VIKAS_VERMA28

Give her as much love as possible. Period.

Wezll sometimes us women love getting att. From other men. It makes us feel good about are selves. Yes Im guilty of being a woman like your wife. I also had a male friend who I shared lots of conversations with. But him and I never crossed bounderies. He new I was married and respected me. I didn't hide anything from my husband he new I had this male friend. But as time went on I started having feelings for that man. I did the right thing and told him I could no longer talk to him. Now working harder then ever on my own marriage. So try to nip it in the butt early on so your wife don't let it get that far. In the end if she is strong enough she will also realize it was wrong. Cause in time no man and women can just be friends.

coachrollo · Nov 14, 2012, 08:55 AM

We have talked and actually I emailed him last week and explanied that I understood they had to talk about work related things but what they were doing was innapropate. And that it needed to stop he is in a powerful position in the company. He did email me back and said if had offened me he was sorry and that it would make sure it didn't happen again. Hopefully she sees what hathis has caused. She swears nothing has happen and she just looks up to him because he is knowledgeable in the business. She also swears she would never cheat on me that she loves me too much. The talks we have had I told her if they didn't have nothing to hide she wouldn't have erased the text or emails.I agree I don't have female friends that I talk to affairs don't start at sex they start at hello.