[redlipsticklena]

I got a lady that does job searching forme through the county. She say I have really messed myself over by not being more together at my age, she said I don't even have enough work experience so she don't know how she is supposed to find me a good job but she looks for them anyway.

Anyway tell meabout some of your son/husband asperger traits.

[Wondergirl]

My husband is the perfect Asperger's person--he has all the characteristics: social anxiety, physical oversensitivity, odd sense of humor, is very good at one or two things, but not many other things, is clumsy (can't dance, can't bowl, can't run, drops things), can't understand how other people feel with their emotions. And he has learned how to cope with these characteristics or rise above them.

Our older son (the library worker) has hyperlexia, not Asperger's.

[Enigma1999]

a man come to me in a grocery store only one time last year and asks me my name. i dont know why. i got away from him in there. he was trying to embarrass me and other people were around and saw the whole thing happen. i just wanted to get out of there.

Is that all he did, was ask your name? How did he embarrass you?

Look, I am going to level with you here. Men are going to say things. Things you may or may not like. Same with women. PEOPLE, in general are going to say things. Just let it go in one ear and out the other. Perhaps try focusing on the good parts, like the fact that this man in the store approached you. He may have thought you were not only pretty, but that you looked nice. Maybe he wanted to have lunch with you. Maybe not. Hell, you may have passed up a great opportunity with a decent man. Not all men behave in such a manner that you stress.

Look, I am a woman, and I look at breasts. I like looking at breasts, and NOBODY can or will stop me. Doesn't mean I am a lesbian. No, I just appreciate the female body. Women are beautiful! Take it for what it is...

I DO see that there is more back story here, which could be why you possess type of behavior, in which I will not go into detail. I see that WG is doing a great job at answering certain questions for you. I only answered what your OP asked.

That being said, try not to let these things bother you. Try not to get angry about it. Look at it this way, you are blessed to look the way you do (assuming you are attractive) and there are many people who wished that they got some attention ANY attention.

Make sense?

[Enigma1999]

You know what? Come to think of it... Why did you choose Red Lipstick for your user name? When I think of "red" lipstick, I think of flashy, seductive, bold, sexy, sensual... For someone who does NOT like a certain type of attention, you sure picked an attention getting user name.

... just saying

[redlipsticklena]

You know what? Come to think of it.... Why did you choose Red Lipstick for your user name? When I think of "red" lipstick, I think of flashy, seductive, bold, sexy, sensual.... For someone who does NOT like a certain type of attention, you sure picked an attention getting user name.

....just sayin

Are you serious? It's a damn username. Come on. Get real. You think a username is what I say in real life too? Please. As I said before 'lena' is a part of my reals name. And for the record I don'teven wear makeup. So go figure that one out.

[redlipsticklena]

My husband is the perfect Asperger's person--he has all the characteristics: social anxiety, physical oversensitivity, odd sense of humor, is very good at one or two things, but not many other things, is clumsy (can't dance, can't bowl, can't run, drops things), can't understand how other people feel with their emotions. And he has learned how to cope with these characteristics or rise above them.

Our older son (the library worker) has hyperlexia, not Asperger's.

I have all the same problem he have. Excepts I live alone and he doesn't. He likes being aspergers now probably since finding a place to belong. Mostlyif you're a woman and like that with those kind of problems you get pushed aside or put in the pile nobody wants anything to do with.

[redlipsticklena]

Is that all he did, was ask your name? How did he embarrass you?

Look, I am going to level with you here. Men are going to say things. Things you may or may not like. Same with women. PEOPLE, in general are going to say things. Just let it go in one ear and out the other. Perhaps try focussing on the good parts, like the fact that this man in the store approached you. He may have thought you were not only pretty, but that you looked nice. Maybe he wanted to have lunch with you. Maybe not. Hell, you may have passed up a great opportunity with a decent man. Not all men behave in such a manner that you stress.

Look, I am a woman, and I look at breasts. I like looking at breasts, and NOBODY can or will stop me. Doesn't mean I am a lesbian. No, I just appreciate the female body. Women are beautiful! Take it for what it is....

I DO see that there is more back story here, which could be why you possess type of behavior, in which I will not go into detail. I see that WG is doing a great job at answering certain questions for you. I only answered what your OP asked.

That being said, try not to let these things bother you. Try not to get angry about it. Look at it this way, you are blessed to look the way you do (assuming you are attractive) and there are many people who wished that they got some attention ANY attention.

Make sense?

Yes he ask what my name was I don'tk now what he wanted, he was stranger. I got the heck out of that store immediately. It was embarrassing some man coming up and trying to talk to me and people were watching how it was going to unfold. I did not know what to do besides leave.

I just would have like to try one date sometime that's all. But I am not the type of person that should even bother with this kind of thing. Sigh. That's why I thinks I'm probablybetter off dead. This world is not for me at all.

No I am not attractive I just have big boobs. And despite what you think I do not like it at all it is uncomfortable having your breast stared at. People should look at your face. You are probably making other peoples uncomfortable by doing that to them and I don't know why you do it. It's not right... if you are a woman and LIKE to have your body looked at by stranger men then again thatsreally weird IMO and I don't get it.

I just feel sick and disgusted. I am tired of hearing about what''s natural for men and women and their sexual natures. If you do not understand theni am not sure how to explain it.

[Wondergirl]

i have all the same problem he have. excepts i live alone and he doesn't. he likes being aspergers now probably since finding a place to belong. mostlyif you're a woman and like that with those kind of problems you get pushed aside or put in the pile nobody wants anything to do with.

No, he doesn't like Asperger's, but he is willing to do his best to cope and has a good attitude. My friend Joel has Asperger's and is a college grad and can't find a job, but he is coping too.

I am pretty sure it is not your Asperger's that is holding you back.

[Alty]

I just have big boobs. And despite what you think I do not like it at all it is uncomfortable having your breast stared at. People should look at your face.

I bet mine are bigger, and it doesn't bother me at all when people look. When they're being creepy about it I just say "My eyes are up here", and point to my face. Usually they laugh it off, and so do I. Not a big deal.

you are probably making other peoples uncomfortable by doing that to them and I don't know why you do it. It's not right... if you are a woman and LIKE to have your body looked at by stranger men then again thatsreally weird IMO and I don't get it.

You really can't judge other people, because you're not the norm. It makes you uncomfortable, but the majority of women out there find it flattering. But then, your last sentence in this post really says it all. In your opinion it's weird, and you don't get it. But that's just you, not the majority.

[talaniman]

Can't be easy being challenged with a cognitive behavior disorder, and have low self esteem and confidence issues, and purely prejudiced against men. Fear is a powerful obstacle.

Did I mention the deficit in coping skills that not only affect how you deal with the flaws of others, but your own as well?

[redlipsticklena]

I bet mine are bigger, and it doesn't bother me at all when people look. When they're being creepy about it I just say "My eyes are up here", and point to my face. Usually they laugh it off, and so do I. Not a big deal.



You really can't judge other people, because you're not the norm. It makes you uncomfortable, but the majority of women out there find it flattering. But then, your last sentence in this post really says it all. In your opinion it's weird, and you don't get it. But that's just you, not the majority.

Yea well that's why I'm getting off the god*damn planet. Don't beleong here. Since its so flattering and they like it good luck with it.

[Enigma1999]

are you serious? it's a damn username. come on. get real. you think a username is what i say in real life too? please. as i said before 'lena' is a part of my reals name. and for the record i don'teven wear makeup. so go figure that one out.

WOW! Your people skills are improving along with your spelling as you go on... wait... no they're not!

Lena, what is it you want from us? We ALL answered your questions. Now, maybe they are not what you wanted OR expected. But we answered.

This thread has gone on long enough...

Bottom line here. People look. Get over it. You are sick and you need help. Now you want to die? Why? Because you have big boobs that men look at? Who cares. Let's take a look at the 10 year boy who has terminal cancer and only has six months to live... OR, how about the six year old girl who contracted HIV through a blood transfusion and only have a little time left to live. Yes. Yes. These kids have NO choice and WANT to live... Then we have YOU, who wants to die over such foolish things! I don't care if you have a mental disorder or aspergers or paranoia... I have a good friend who has autism and Aspergers AND ADHD, and she STILL goes to college (4.0) in active in sports, works as well as volunteers of hospitals. So... I don't want to hear this sob story. You have a life, so live it! Quit your b!tching and pick up a hobby, because quite frankly, I am getting sick of you hot and cold behavior, as well as insulting members (Judy). You are beginning to wear my patience thin!

[redlipsticklena]

Can't be easy being challenged with a cognitive behavior disorder, and have low self esteem and confidence issues, and purely prejudiced against men. Fear is a powerful obstacle.

Did I mention the deficit in coping skills that not only affect how you deal with the flaws of others, but your own as well?

I guess any women's don't like their bodies being stared at by men like animals. Are prejudiced against them. What else is new

And I do not even know what you mean by coping skills that's deficit. Its probably some kind of insult. Again nothing new from people

[Enigma1999]

No, he doesn't like Asperger's, but he is willing to do his best to cope and has a good attitude. My friend Joel has Asperger's and is a college grad and can't find a job, but he is coping too.

I am pretty sure it is not your Asperger's that is holding you back.

BRAVO! Exactly my thought!

[talaniman]

No insult at all just an observation since many of us encounter people and situations we don't like and really have little control over. We devise strategies for these situations tocopw with them,thus coping skills.

Just because a guy stares at your boobs, or slobs at the mouth doesn't mean all guys are like that (but I concede some of us are animals and inconsiderate morons... just as much as females to be fair!). And I doubt if you have met all the guys in the world and think your experience with them is flawed by condition, experience, or background since its so way over the top and hardly could be a fact.

So why do you hate men, who taught you this? Look tell me what you are really scared of.

[redlipsticklena]

No, he doesn't like Asperger's, but he is willing to do his best to cope and has a good attitude. My friend Joel has Asperger's and is a college grad and can't find a job, but he is coping too.

I am pretty sure it is not your Asperger's that is holding you back.

Well good for them then. I can't finds a job and never could find anything solid. So what the hell am I doing here's then? No reason to be

[redlipsticklena]

No insult at all just an observation since many of us encounter people and situations we don't like and really have little control over. We devise strategies for these situations tocopw with them,thus coping skills.

Just because a guy stares at your boobs, or slobs at the mouth doesn't mean all guys are like that (but I concede some of us are animals and inconsiderate morons............just as much as females to be fair!). And I doubt if you have met all the guys in the world and think your experience with them is flawed by condition, experience, or background since its so way over the top and hardly could be a fact.

So why do you hate men, who taught you this? Look tell me what you are really scared of.

Oh okay it was not a insult. Well my copingskill is thinking about trying to ways for suicide. That's what happen anytime I get stress and want to get the hell out of here. There's nothing here for me anymore.

All I can hear about are people telling me how others get by and how 'oh they are able to do this and that.' well good for them then. I am tired of trying and want out.

No I have not met all the men but 95 percent of them is all about sex and how quick they can get it. They say something wrong with woman in my age group that's not experienced. They never give me a chance in the first place. And I didn't say I hate men you said that. I do not understands the men and that's another thing I'm tired of trying. No point. You have a window of time like 15 to 25 to be a normal woman and if it don't happen they writes you off as worthless and/or crazy.

A lot of the men try to do FWB or one night stand because it's a quick way forthem to get sex without no effort towards the woman. I think they are disgusting in their behaviors sorry to say. They do not want you if you cannot give them regular sexual favors

[talaniman]

I have to many fun hobbies and interesting people to be thinking of suicide when I am stressed. I have to many cool people in my life to even sweat the actions of morons.

Do you have any male friends, or males you trust? How about your hobbies and interests? How about your mom and dad? Do you get along with them? Any siblings?

Generally what culture are you from? I am nosy aren't I? Why are you afraid to try things that may benefit you?

[Alty]

What sort of men are you meeting and where are you meeting them that you came to the conclusion that 95% of them are sex fiend pigs?

I have to say that I know many men, and out of all the men I know maybe 1% are only after sex. Even then, they're not nearly as bad as what you described.

I find it sad that every time something happens that you can't handle, you want to kill yourself. I also find it very sad that the things that you can't handle are things that happen in daily life to most of the population on this planet.

I know you're in therapy, does your therapist help you learn to cope with every day life, things that most people would brush off, but you find debilitating?

[redlipsticklena]

What sort of men are you meeting and where are you meeting them that you came to the conclusion that 95% of them are sex fiend pigs?

I have to say that I know many men, and out of all the men I know maybe 1% are only after sex. Even then, they're not nearly as bad as what you described.

I find it sad that every time something happens that you can't handle, you want to kill yourself. I also find it very sad that the things that you can't handle are things that happen in daily life to most of the population on this planet.

I know you're in therapy, does your therapist help you learn to cope with every day life, things that most people would brush off, but you find debilitating?

Please you people don't put words in my mouth. I never said anythingabout a sex fiend pig. Or whatever.

If these thing happen to everyone on the planet, I'm not everyone on the planet and good for them though. My therapist cannot helps me with everyday life. I don't know what she is suppose to do for a person with an f'ed up brain that is programmed for suicide every day. Only reasons I go toher is to talk to somebody. She can't helpme anymore. She say don't think negative and that's it. I do not talks to her about the men. She doesn't get it at all. She just say 'stay away from them then' if I have issues.

Its funny you say so little of the men aren't all about sex, really? Howmany of them open to being with women with little to no experiences at my age?/ let me tell you mostly none. They LABEL us as crazy and/or not worth the hassle when there's so many to choose from that's not freaks. I knowthis from all the stupid times I try to get date like 'everyone else on the planet' as you put it. They are always 'not that bad' when you are a normal everyday kind of women try not being like that and then see how they are with you. You will learn a lot then about how 'great' and 'amazing' they are.