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    1bsurferwalker's Avatar
    1bsurferwalker Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 14, 2012, 05:39 PM
    3 year old tears bedroom apart
    My 3 year old daughter who share 50% of time with me. Has lately been destroying her room, covered her whole room, bed, toys, dresser with baby powder. Last week she tore all the feathers out of one of her dess up boa's. When I asked her why she said "because I did". I don't understand.

    I take her too the park, bike rides, swim class. I try to be involved with all activities and let her have play time with the girl next door, I don't leave her in pre-school day care for 9 hours as is the case with mom on her days. Sometime I don't even take my daughter to preschool so her and I can have the whole day together.

    I am lost as too what Im doing or not doing. I discipline and show love and affection. I have been told countless times what a great dad I am but yet I end with this bad behavior

    It has been suggested that it is not me but her home life between parents, she might be lacking something or coping. We have been separated living apart for 8 months
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Aug 14, 2012, 05:46 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 1bsurferwalker View Post
    My 3 year old daughter who share 50% of time with me. Has lately been destroying her room, covered her whole room, bed, toys, dresser with baby powder. Last week she tore all the feathers out of one of her dess up boa's. When I asked her why she said "because I did". I dont understand.

    I take her too the park, bike rides, swim class. I try to be involved with all activities and let her have play time with the girl next door, I dont leave her in pre-school day care for 9 hours as is the case with mom on her days. Sometime I dont even take my daughter to preschool so her and I can have the whole day together.

    I am lost as too what Im doing or not doing. I discipline and show love and affection. I have been told countless times what a great dad I am but yet I end with this bad behavior

    It has been suggested that it is not me but her home life between parents, she might be lacking something or coping. We have been seperated living apart for 8 months


    Who was watching her when she did the damage?
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #3

    Aug 14, 2012, 06:05 PM
    It sounds like she is angry at you for being apart from your wife, and why not? She isn't old enough to talk about it other than 'why are you not at home.' Have you talked to her about all of that? Toys, walks, parks, love - nothing makes up for what you and her mother did to her, and it's going to be a lot of work for a long long time. You CAN talk to a 3 year old. Look for a book on how to talk about divorce to a child.
    Kallyp's Avatar
    Kallyp Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Aug 30, 2012, 11:07 PM
    Maybe you just need to ask her nicely to talk and sit down where politely ask her why she did it and tell her that you did not like that she did that and that you hope she will. Never do that again time out (depends on parents point of view could be asertied as a punnismenf time getting larger every time stopping at 8 min so they understand it's a punishment
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #5

    Aug 30, 2012, 11:30 PM
    Sounds like she is 3.

    Every time it happens, you guys team up and clean it up together. And then make sure she knows she cannot play with her toys for the rest of the day. EVERY single time she destroys the room.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Aug 31, 2012, 01:29 AM
    Yes sounds a lot like 1/2 of all of the 2 or 3 year olds

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